vinces diary part 2

blackbelt

vince is walking backstage and bumps into stone cold steve austin

vm:hey steve,ready for the movie
sc:what!?
vm:the new movie projects
sc:what!?

vm:listen regarding the tess broussard shoot match,we think it would be a bad image for wwe but the ball is in your court.
sc:hell vince,it was always in my court.what!?

vm: what!?
sc:don't you say what to me again.you think your going to run rough-shod over the good name of stone cold steve austin?....what!?
vm:no,eh i have to go.have a good day steve
sc:good-day vince....what!?

vince walks further and meets his solicitor

vm:well,whats the story with brock lesnar.
s:well basically it doesn't look good for the wwe vince.brock lesnar is nearly certain to win this case and wrestle in japan.
s:damn lesnar,he's the next big dumbass.he certainly won't get back to wwe when he is demanding a salary that is ridiculous
s:well we were hoping to get back into contract negotiations with brock after wrestlemania.
vm:i got it.....at wrestlemania vincent kennedy mcmahon will challenge brock lesnar to a fight on raw the next night.that will stir some ****.if he makes it from minneapolis to new york in 24hours,i will give him what he wants.if not i will have a brock lookalike come out with a nfl football thinking he's the next big player.but i will fight the lookalike and win.this indicates that brock is the next big thing to kiss my ass.
vm:thanks for stopping by

vince then walks down to the parking area and meets theodore long

TL:holla at ye playa
vm:a big north carolina holla to you to teddy
tl:vince i had an epiphany playa.i think to boost smackdown ratings that yours truly resurrect the godfather gimmick and have loadsa bitchas follow me around
vm;yes good idea,our women wrestlers are good and sexy,they draw in the biggest rating segments so thats what smackdown shall do.
tl:raw don't have a chance playa.i mean look at my playa-wear homedog.
vm:i see it teddy.and let me inform you that that playa-wear or whatever you call it...will server you well as special guest referee at wrestlemania fotr the match between orton and taker.
tl:but my shoulder playa
vm:teddy your lucky i didn't fire your ass...i saw you with those girls and theres nothing wrong with your shoulder.it was a ruse to better your career.but i must admire your grapefruits playa..thagts some neck and ruthless consideration you got.
tl:thanks playa
vm:and you make a good general manager on smackdown.so nothing will happen.good-day.

tl is embarassed and goes red as vince leaves.

vince heads into his office

vm:jr,where is my coffee
jr:its brewing
vm:ok,where are those documents
jr:here they are
vm:yes its all in order,you will be inducted in to the vince mcmahon kiss my ass club straight after you are inducted in to the hall of fame.
jr:great vince
vm:tell johnny "ace" laurinaitis to go and hang himself.that should get rid of that bad odour in the wwe.
jr:with pleasure

laurinaitis is in the corridor with the hurricane

jl:wheres your suit hurricane?
h:i left it in the phonebox before transforming from gregory helms into the hurricane
jl:don't try and sell that sh$t to me.hurricane,i will bring your misbehaviour to the wwe board of directors and you will be punished.
jr:laurinaitis...boomer sooner,your fired,finito benito.asta la vista
jl:what.whats going on
jr:vince said you suck and that wwe morale is down and that your the problem
jl:well.....im going to tna.me and vince russo don't need you guys anyway

vince interrupts

vm:vince who??....oh yeah the man who thought he was better than us,jumped onto the sinking dubblya c dubblya ship and sank.vince russo.well good luck laurinaitis...your definitely going to need it.you won't last five minutes down in florida

vince leaves and takes out his cell phone

vm:hey hulk hows it going.
hh:great vince.im looking forward to being at wrestlemania 21
vm:me too
hh:what ye gonna do when hulk hogan and his new hip run wild all over....actually who is my opponent duuude?
vm:well i thought i'd tell ye.macho man ain't coming back cos you'll be there.he also said that if there would be a chance you'd arrive there should he be in attendence,he'd have the whole LAPD out in force
hh:you know something duuude,macho man could never get over the fact that i have 24inch pythons duude,he could never get over the fact i slept with elizabeth and never put him over.he could never come close to the hulkster and all the lil hulkamaniacs.
vm:tell me about it,the guy has so much beef with everyone it would make you hungry.anyway hulk,the new deal is that stone cold will be on pipers pit and have an interview.i plan on having you come out and challengint hem 2 to a triple threat match.the losers have to wear a skirt for a month.
hh:excellent dude,you know piper is a big closet freak duude anyway.
vm:first i heard of it but ok.i'll catch u later hogan

vince then calls macho man

vm:macho man,hulk hogan says he won't be at wrestlemania
mm:ooooooohhh yeeeaaah diggit,the mmaaaacho man just p*nked the hulkster the F*ck out on mtv.once agaiiin the macho man wins diggit.the coward hogan couldn't be a maaaan.2 things im going to accomplish (he actually waves his finger as he says it) nuuumber one...to punk hogan the f*ck out and number 2.........
vm:number 2
mm:yyyeeeaaaah,thats to call hogan out and make him be a man.
vm:sounds good macho man.gotta go

vm:hee heee heee.....its been too long since 1994.time for another screwjob which will build ratings......hogan and savage collide...legit.theres no chance in hell people will switch off now

vince turns to the mirror.his fave is all red and he starts smiling and then laughs

vm:your screwed now mega powers...your screwed now

TO BE CONTINUED



s:well that could be

Kio

thats good dude cant wait till the next one the first one was better

leggo

Why would Vince write transcripts in his diary? And why would it be in third person? Is a diary not meant to begin with 'Dear Diary' and have the...eh...diarist (?) write about their day after it happened?

blackbelt

well yes but i never thought of it that way i just thought it was a good title to it.what do want me to call it cause i can rename it if you all want?

leggo

Nah man, call it what you want, I was just saying it was a little misleading that's all. Something like, "The Life and Times of Vince McMahon" would, in MY not-so-humble opinion, be more appropriate, but it's your thing at the end of the day.

The Fitz

Keep it up dude!