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Elephants

  • 03-07-2001 5:59pm
    #1
    TheWolf
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 801 ✭✭✭


    There was this tiger who woke up one morning and just felt great. He felt so good, he went out and cornered a small monkey and roared at him, "Who is the mightiest of all the jungle animals!?!" And this poor quaking little monkey replied, "You are of course, no one is mightier than you."
    A little while later, this tiger confronts a deer and just bellows out, "Who is the greatest and strongest of all the jungle animals!?!!" The deer is shaking so hard it can barely speak, but manages to stammer, "Oh great tiger, you are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle."
    The tiger, being on a roll, swaggered up to an elephant that was quietly munching on some weeds and roared at the top of his voice, "Who is the mightiest of all the animals in the jungle!?!?!!"
    Well, this elephant grabs the tiger with his trunk, picks him up, slams him down, picks him up again, and shakes him until the tiger is just a blur of orange and black, and finally throws him violently into a nearby tree. The tiger staggers to his feet and looks at the elephant and says, "Man, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so ****ed!"


    An ant is walking along thinking to himself..."Jeeze, I'm so horny!" Then, he spies a female elephant. The ant crawls up the elephant's leg and into the elephants ear and says "Miss Elephant, It's been soooo long since I've had sex and I'm soooo horny....do you mind if I crawl around back and do my thing?".
    The elephant, rather indifferently, says "OK....whatever.". so the ant goes around back and does his thing...but a monkey sees whats going on and... as monkeys do... decides he's gonna mess up the ants business by throwing a coconut at the ant. He misses the ant and hits the elephant in the back of the head. The elephant lets out a loud "Owwwww!!
    In his heated state, the ant picks up the pace and exclaims "That's right....take it, Bítch!!"



    "Only two things are infinite,
    the universe and stupidity, and
    I'm not sure about the former."

    Albert Einstein

    "Never argue with idiots. They just drag you down to their level, where they have all the experience"

    TheWolf


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