How long after a break up is it ok......?

Wolf

Right for once im posting here and life isn't too bad. Theres this girl that moved in next door to me. Shes really good looking, funny, intelligent and all that jazz and tbh im quite taken with her.

We had been hanging out for about a month and I was falling for her more and more only thing is she had a boy friend (sniff sniff). However, one of my mates was all like "Shes really into you and all that". So I keep on hoping, but, don't get me wrong I wasn't trying anything on as I don't mess with other peoples relationships thats wrong.

Anyway, Valintines weekend im feeling crapy funny enough as her boyfriend is coming up as it turns out as far as I know he dumped her and hes gone by sunday. So Valintines day we all go out for cocktailes and me and her end up all kissy kissy OH sing HOSANA So, im happy. That night I said to her about the fact that she just got out of another relationship and all that, but, we never really discused it properly. So the next night we hang out all day and at the end of the night we have a kiss on the lips and she goes home (baby steps). Then the next night we have a slighly more serious kiss before she goes home hehe and last night we end up kissing on her bed for about 3 hours.

Now heres the thing, I know she liked be before dumping her bfriend, so its not just throw back, but, how slow/fast and all that should I take things I really like this girl. I mean whatever about meeting someone im this into, but, she really seem quite taken with me some how, i really don't want to make a mess of this. I mean should I give her some time alone, but, can't now as we have kinda started WHAT SHOULD I DO????

Wolf

PS soz for any grammer Im a bit excited atm as she will be home soon and we are going to get a bite to eat

WhiteWashMan

if she doesnt want tim e alone, then dont give her time alone.
if she does, then do it.

if she wants to shag, shag.
there are no rules.

of course, you will end up being the rebound fling, so enjoy it until she thinks she needs to be by herslef for a while or whatever rubbishy excuse comes out.

you may as well enjoy the ride, and hey, if it turns out your not a rebound fling and you get a reltionship going, what exactly did you lose?

skywalker

you dont mention how long/serious her previous relationship was?

BaZmO*

skywalker wrote:

you dont mention how long/serious her previous relationship was?

I don't think that really matters.

WWM's advice seems sound enough. There's no rules with stuff like this.

B.

LegacyUser

She got dumped? And is now on the rebound...be the smarter one here and stay one step ahead.

Wolf

Seriously, she went off traveling and stuff with out the guy and then came to Uni and I THINK that why it eneded. Also, it was obvious to just about everyone in the uni that we had it in for each other before they broke up. I mean we spent nearly all our time together and she commented about my looks and my general niceness as a boy (I think this is her only downside crazy ) so I honestly don't think its total rebound anyway but I don't want to end up that way as well.

Also, I reckon they had a long, but, not too intense relationship but it hard to tell.

Also, I have only ever meet 4 girls in my 25 years that Iv realy liked and Iv been to alot of places and meet alot of people. This is the 4th girl Iv every realy liked and now by some gift its working for once I realy don't want to mess it up or more to the point its not so much about messing it up it more I dont want to do anything that will wrong her.

LegacyUser

Ah fair enough. I was just giving you advice there just to make sure you are ahead in case whatever happens...just basically suss it out and sort out what is going on between you and pay close attention to her emotions. Is she upset she got dumped?

PowerHouseDan

Just be yourself to. She liked/likes you for the way you were, Dont start to try and change to be "Perfect" just be yourself

Wolf

powerhousedan wrote:

Just be yourself to. She liked/likes you for the way you were, Dont start to try and change to be "Perfect" just be yourself

Thats good advice that ta dan.

I had a bit of a chat with her and shes fine staying over and making out basicaly, but, notthing more for now which I told her is more than fine. I said that we can take as much time as she wants about everything weeks, moonths hell Id wait years tbh.

Weird thing is two nights now shes been asking if "I" have doubts. Shes all like "You could be kissing anyone why me?!?!?!" as IF! Now is this some sort of trick she can't really mean it. I mean I reasure her that IF? I could pick anyone it would be her.

Anyway, all seems good. Thanks for all the comments esp Dan its good to be reminded not to change too much just cuz stuff starts.

EDIT

Actually she seemed upset about the break up on the monday night, but, since having a good old cry she seem totaly unphazed I mean she never talked about him that much before and once said to me that they were more like friends now really. I think the way it happened upset her, but, otherwise she really seems ok.

PowerHouseDan

No Prob, Best of luck with it. Let us know how your getting on.