best line of dialogue ever

gimp, apparently

"Dammit Smithers, this is brain surgery not rocket science, now hand me the damn ice-cream scoop!"

[This message has been edited by gimp, apparently (edited 07-03-2001).]

gimp, apparently

i learned how to edit, yay!

[This message has been edited by gimp, apparently (edited 07-03-2001).]

--Kaiser--

Indeed it is!

Canaboid

Err, you spelt rong rong as well.

Lump

I never knew edit was spelt post reply.


John

DadaKopf

Shouldn't it be, "I spelled it wrongly?" or "I spelled it incorrectly?"

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"I collect spores, moulds and fungus."

tobi

tis funny alright

the fnj

This is an argument that will never reach a conclusion but one of my favourite Simpson quotes has to be.

Remember he ate my goldfish and you tried to lie and tell me that I didn’t have any goldfish! But why did I have the bowl Bart? Why did I have the bowl?

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Clan Acid

--Kaiser--

A line of dialogue not quite so funny but still good:||
||
\/

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Bart:How would i go about creating a half-monkey, half-man creature?

Ms. Krabapel:I'm sorry that would be playing god.

Bart:(Smacks fist on table)God schmod, i want my monkey-man!

Winning Hand

There was a new simpsons two weeks back (dunno if its out there or not) when homer gets a tennis court in the back garden.
Anyway Mr burns shows up with smithers looking for a game

Marge: But Mr Burns dont you have a court of your own?
Smithers: Actually he converted it to a human chess board.
(cuts to the chess board)
White pawn no.1 :Hey Mr Burns has been gone a while now
White pawn no.2 :Lets make a run for it.
(White players run away)
White king : Dammit fools protect me
(all the red players start beating up the white king)

Very funny but I suppose you gotta see it

Canaboid

Homer: Let the bears pay the bear tax, I pay the Homer tax.

Lisa: Thats the homeowners tax, Dad.

adnans

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Canaboid:
Homer: Let the bears pay the bear tax, I pay the Homer tax.

Lisa: Thats the homeowners tax, Dad.</font>

som1 was watchin simpsons last nite , very funny. homer is the genius in us all.

adnans

Blitzkrieger

yeah - "I don't see any tigers around here, do you?"

gimp, apparently

wow, 13 replys, who'da thunk it! sniffle.. i love you guys.. sniffle

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Canaboid:
Err, you spelt rong rong as well.</font>

that was too obvious, i was gonna reply with that to myself, you stole my that... sea-bass turd!!! that'll learn ya.

gimp, apparently

'nuther one -
"its gonna take a whole lotta fireworks to clean this place up!"

Canaboid

"How much for the rock ?"

TwoShedsJackson

'Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons!!!'

for some reason that 5 second bit is cut on Sky 1 whenever they show that episode. Dunno why.

--Kaiser--

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Castor Troy:
'Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons!!!'

for some reason that 5 second bit is cut on Sky 1 whenever they show that episode. Dunno why.</font>

No actually, that was cut out of the original version, cos it was too long, and replaced by homer ringing the bell and running away, which is not nearly as funny.
The one you saw was shown in the 136th episode spectacular

Now that the mention it, Sky 1 does edit the simpsons, as i have noticed new bits in the simpsons i see on bbc2.

Ignorant fu[kers, i think anyone who would edit the simpsons deserves to be hung, drawn and slaughtered.

Guy Incognito

Sky 1 don't show the part in The Simpsons St. Patrick's Day episode where the John Bull pub is blown up. Saw this for the first time a few weeks ago on BBC2.

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Just squeeze your anger into a bitter little ball and release it at an appropriate time, like when Daddy hit the referee with the whiskey bottle. Remember that, when Daddy hit the referee?

gimp, apparently

Homer: (Whistling)(Unzips his fly)
Bart: DAD!
Homer: Oh, I'm sorry, I didnt know you, Jay Leno and a monkey were bathing a clown.

the celtic tiger

Sky1 don't show the bit where Itchy and Scratchy kill Hitler either.

odd.


I like the bit with the human chess board. haven't seen it, but it sounds class!

tct

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I'm a bicycle!!

I'm offended.

BAN THAT GUY!


In all seriousness....the greatest place on earth!

smoke.me.a.kipper

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by the celtic tiger:
Sky1 don't show the bit where Itchy and Scratchy kill Hitler either.
</font>

Then the american prez at the time comes in and helps kick hitlers. I saw that on Network2.

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[Honey I]gassed[The Kids]
<A HREF="http://www.leet-skillz.com

" TARGET=_blank>www.leet-skillz.com

</A> me a kipper, i'll be back for breakfast."

gimp, apparently

Homer: (falling asleep) beeer... dooughnuts... boooobies...

Victor

just read the sig....

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[cue Homer Simpson voice] Hmmm, pigeons.

plastic membrane

Homer : Well, that wraps everything up in a neat little PACKAGE!!!....really, i mean that. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic..

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Damn it Jim, im a doctor, not a Beefy King !

Thanx 4 The Fish

In the stonecutters episode.

Homer :- "And by the Sacred Parchment, I swear that if I reveal the secrets of The Stonecutters, may my stomach become bloated and my head be plucked of all but three hairs."

Moe :- "Um, I think he should have to take a different oath."

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You never expect the Beefy Inquisition !!!

neuro-praxis

Ralph Wiggum:

"When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University!"

"Hi Lisa, hi Supernintendo Chalmers, hi liar!"

"Mrs. Krobopple and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies, and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me."

"Look Daddy, a whale egg!"

Ralph's oral essay on Principal Skinner's life:
"Principal Skinner is an old man who lives at the school. Teacher made me go to Principal Skinner's office when I was dirty. When I grow up, I want to be a principal, or a caterpiller! I love you Principal Skinner!"

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Give me back my towel. I'll sue.

the fnj

So any of you guys doing anything illegal?

Homer no function beer well without!

When I get board I make up my own movie!

It's a ring toss game!

Dam you Walt Witman!

The have the internet on computers now!

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Clan Acid

Enygma

From the Thelma and Louise episode:

Wiggum (asked for his location): "uhh, we're on a road, seems to be asphalt...trees....I'm directly under the earths sunnn...... now!"

later on when she turns off the lights in the car:
Wiggum: "Oh my god! It's one of those ghost cars!"


Ahh he's the best

Anyways, this isn't a simpsons only thread, what about South Park.
"Damn your black heart Barbera Streisand!"

Paladin

The powerplant has just funded a new town warning system in case of a meltdown with flashing lights etc.

Lenny: The ironic thing is that if there is a meltdown there wont be anything to power it.

DadaKopf

"The internet? is that thing still around?"

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"I collect spores, moulds and fungus."

Thanx 4 The Fish

DOUGAL- Ahh, lets see I'll have the Hindu Curry, Steak and Chips, and a glass of Coke thanks.
POLICEMAN- Do you know where you are? Your in a police station.
DOUGAL- Oh right. Well, in that case, I'll just have the Satay Chicken.

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You never expect the Beefy Inquisition !!!

Winning Hand

Heres another old (new) episode part
(homer has become an internet gossip guy under the name of Mr. X

Comic guy:
Lets see here "Sex" "XXX" wait heres "Mr.X". Shall I step the forbidden boundary????? Ok. Whats this, pothole money used to fund a swimming pool for the mayor. Why there isnt an emoticon that can be used to describe my rage

DeadBankClerk

southpark:

[at the bus stop, bus stops at children]
bus driver lady: [shouts] GET ON! we're running late!
kyle: we're not geting on, you fat ugly *****.
bus driver lady: WHAT DID YOU SAY?
kyle: i said 'we're not geting on, you fat ugly *****.'
bus driver lady: oh. alright then. [drives off]

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- Dead Bank Clerk -
honey i pimped the kids
"Cosmus Equitiaes magnus cinaedus
et fellator est suris apertise."
-pompeiian graffiti

gimp, apparently

Wiggum again:In pursuit of a blue... (squints)... car!

Yo Mamma

Wiggam again...outside the Brothel....

Bart........"Take him away boys !"

Wiggam......"Hey thats my line ! Bake him away toys !"

Lou........."What was that chief?????"

Wiggam......"Just do what the kid says!!"


Or....

Rex Banner.."One of these days I'l catch u Beer Barron!!"

Homer(in Distance)...."No u wont !!"

Rex Banner.."Yes I will!!"

Homer......."WONT"

Bloody Drunkard

sky1 always cut things on the st patricks day episode they cut a scene of a british pub blowing up

Mr Burns : They know too much. Smithers use the amnesia ray

Smithers: You mean the revolver

Burns : Yes and be sure to wipe your own memory too

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BlOoDy DrUnKaRd

boddah

Futurama quote:

Bender:[Waking up] Oh, I've just had a horrible nightmare, ones and zeroes everywhere... and I think I saw a two!

Fry: it's OK Bender, you *know* two doesn't exist

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Durty auld Morris drums... they're fu*kin' great!!

Bloody Drunkard

Me fail English Thats umpossible

or

Ralph : When i grow up i want to be just like daddy

Skinner : Better start eating

or


You done good Ralph now you know what you must do burn em, burn the house the down

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Somebody Please buy me some alchol

gimp, apparently

Homer: mmmm...64 slices of american cheese

plastic membrane

Skinner :
Forgery ! So he didnt have leprosy !!!

Or Airplane:

Doctor : We've got to get these people to a hospital !!
Stewardess :: Why, what is it ?
Doctor : its a big building with patients, but thats not important right now...

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Damn it Jim, im a doctor, not a Beefy King !

Fidelis

Woman:Surely you can't be serious ?

Doctor:I am serious, and don't call me Sherley.

Skorzeny

Bender(defending himself): Hey, I`m generous. Yesterday i gave blood.

Fry: Who`s blood?

Bender: Dunno, Someguy i found in the streat.

--Kaiser--

(Homer praying, looking upwards, 'O God Why' etc..)

Marge:Homer, thats not God, thats a waffle stuck to the ceiling.

(Homer dislodges waffle eith broom handle, and proceeds to eat it)

Homer: Mmmmm, sacriliscious!

Cerberus

What about the time Homer goes searching for Lisa in the Russian quarter and he gets stranded up on top of a runaway portable elevator platform.

Homer "Ahh...D'Oh...Ahhh....I'm not a religious man, but if you're really up there,
please help me Superman!!!!.....Ahhh!!"

Fiona02

mrs k: embiggen is a perfectly chromulent word.

homer meeting ned for the first time
flanders: "my name's Flanders but my friends call me ned!"
homer: "go home Flanders"

futurama
zap brannigan: Leila, i just want you to know that if things dont work out with this guy i will be *right there* to score you on the rebound"

uhuh uhuh