This ones for the boys....

--Kaiser-- · 27-02-2001 1:16pm #1

A young man is wandering, lost, in a forest when he comes upon
a
small house. Knocking on the door, he is greeted by an ancient
Oriental
man
with
a long grey beard. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me
up
for
the night?"
"Certainly," the old man said, "but on one condition. If you
so
much
as lay
a finger on my daughter, I will inflict upon you the three
worst
Chinese
tortures known to man."
"OK," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty
old
as
well, and entered the house. Over dinner the daughter came
down
the
stairs.
She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic body. She was
obviously
attracted
to the young man as she couldn't keep her eyes off him during
the
meal.
Remembering the old man's warning he ignored her and went up
to
bed alone.
During the night he could bear it no longer and sneaked into
her
room
for a
night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so
the
old
man
wouldn't hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his room,
exhausted
but
happy.

He woke to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes, he
saw
a
large rock on his chest with a note on it that read:
"Chinese Torture No.1: Large rock on chest."
Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best
the
old
man can do then I don't have much to worry about." He picked
the
boulder up,
sleepily walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.
As
he
did so,
he noticed another note on the window that read:
"Chinese Torture No.2: Rock tied to left testicle."

In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already
getting
close to taut. Figuring that a few broken bones was better
than
castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted towards the ground, he saw a large sign on the
that read:

"Chinese Torture No.3: Right testicle tied to bedpost."