Vatican Denounces Inverted Mouse

Lord Khan

Not sure if this belongs under games or humour

Pope John Paul II made an announcement that has the Roman Catholic gamers of the world up in arms today: it is now a sin to use the "inverted mouse" in First and Third Person shooters.

"It was never God's intent for the mouse to be used in such a profane manner" the papal statement reads. "It was always intended that up was up and down was down, never reversed in some profane abomination," His Holieness continues.

The majority of the Catholic gaming community was unaffected by this announcement, as inverted mouse users have always been in the minority. "I never did trust those inverties." Commented Father Don McLeod. "I always suspected it such a tendency had roots in Lucifer. That or communism. We as Catholics must always remember these few things: Women have no choice when it comes to their own bodies, sex is NOT enjoyable, homosexuals are all going to hell, and the inverted mouse is an unnatural abomination in the eyes of our Lord God."

The announcement has lead to a small group of "closet" inverted mouse players. Community leaders have started weekly prayer meetings for those reluctant to see the error of their ways. These meetings attempt to invoke the will of God through prayer, in an attempt to "pray the invertedness out of the poor tortured soul." The resistance is fairly strong, though. "Look, I'm sorry, it just doesn't feel right to me. As long as I've been a gamer, I've always felt this way. Your prayers wont change that." Stated one beleaguered Catholic gamer.

Other gamers are just giving up entirely, so difficult is the transition to "normalcy."

"Well, if I can't play my video games, I'll just go to my room and masturbate. Oh… wait… darn it!"

Victor

Jonny: yer screwed.

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[cue Homer Simpson voice] Hmmm, pigeons.

SantaHoe

INVERTED MOUSE 0WNZ J00

Lump

Inverted mouse is the biggest load of crap :P

John

Fidelis

UP is DOWN

and

DOWN is UP

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Nil Desperandum

Kali

booo inverted mouse.

Stephen

Inverted mouse is the way to go

boddah

inverted mouse is the tool of lucifer himself.
if god had intended us to use the inverted mouse, he would have set the default setting to "yes".
think about it

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"you'd be paranoid too, if everyone was out to get you..."

Snaga

Bah to all your non inverted mouse hides!

tis the only way to play , just think if magically they switched around. All them pilots would crash on takeoff and the world would return to choas and anarky....

*honest*

TwoShedsJackson

It has to be inverted - it just makes sense.

Baz_

makes sense in a mirror.

Da Bounca

oh yeh, it does

Bard

Without my inverted warped sense of reality, I'd be doing something different with my life, and probably falling over a lot less.

Without my inverted mouse and trackball, my little Quake dude would be having difficulty with the comparitively simple task of standing up straight.

Inverted mouse all the wayyyyyyyy...