Age diff, whats acceptable??

LegacyUser

I'm 22 and my girlfriend is 18, my problem is i'm 23 this month and she is 19 in May, am i being a bit of a fool going out with someone so much younger than me?? She doesnt see it as a problem and i dont really either but was wondering what other people think. My mam keeps tellin me she is too young for me and all that crap, so she is getting taughts into my head

Cheers

happyhippie

are you kidding me? You're both adults. Generally, girls mature faster than guys, so you two are probably at the same level of emotional maturity. Unless she is quite immature, and that's what's bothering your mum?

I don't think age should matter, last guy I went out with was 12 years older than me! It's all up to the individuals concerned. If you don't feel she's too young for you- she isn't.

Sleepy

If it doesn't bother you when it's just you and her, it shouldn't bother you around other people. It's their problem if they disapprove of what most people would consider to be a fairly minor age gap, not yours.

*adele*

i dont think anyone can just tell you if its acceptable if youre ok with it then thats all that matters,but thats just me..

cajun_tiger

age is just a number as long as its leagal

aidan_walsh

cajun_tiger wrote:

age is just a number as long as its leagal

Uh, no... There are also matters of maturity, etc, that while they may not apply here, they would had the gap been any larger...

LegacyUser

right, i know i shouldnt have a problem with it but i kinda lied to my college mates saying she was 20. now i think i have f@*ked up. She wants to meet my mates but now that i hav lied to them i keep stalling it.

So do i tell the truth to my college mates or just tell her ro say she is 20? I dont think she'd like that though. All my mates from home know her real age but they dont care and jus take the piss out of me.

The Corinthian

For men in particular, dating younger women is almost inevitable. I remember a similar situation for myself when I was 23 and the woman in question was 18. I’ll admit I thought it awkward at first but got over it. It’s never bothered me since.

You’ll get over it too.

The Fitz

I dont see the big deal with it, although if i were to go out with a tewlve year old(im 14 by they way) it'd be considered wrong

Lexie

My first real boyfriend was 9 years older than me. He was 26 and I was 17. Lasted about 4 years. Wasnt the age difference that broke us up. My last boyfriend was 15 years older than me. I dont think it ever bothered any of them. I dont think age should be a factor in determining whether someone is right for someone and as for your mother, its your life!

*adele*

only 2 years...but yeah i get you..

garthv

im 20 and my girlfriend is 18 and me and her get on like a house on fire,if you like her then dont let your mother come between you.

meditraitor

after about 17yo woman are fair game for any man 17-70, the age gap doesnt matter as long as you are attracted to each other..
nobody cares about that type of thing... wouldnt worry,,enjoy

The Corinthian

dope wrote:

right, i know i shouldnt have a problem with it but i kinda lied to my college mates saying she was 20. now i think i have f@*ked up. She wants to meet my mates but now that i hav lied to them i keep stalling it.

So do i tell the truth to my college mates or just tell her ro say she is 20? I dont think she'd like that though. All my mates from home know her real age but they dont care and jus take the piss out of me.

Reading this I would think that she should be more concerned with your maturity than you should be of hers.

petes

Its only a couple of years...Im 24 and my girlfriend is 31. No problems here. Dont let what anybody else thinks spoil your happiness.

Chinafoot

dope wrote:

My mam keeps tellin me she is too young for me and all that crap, so she is getting taughts into my head

well you need to knock that on the head for a start. i went out with a guy who was 5 years older than me and his mam had a major problem with it. she told him constantly that i was too young and was probably going to get pregnant blah blah blah. anyway because he was still living at home this caused a fair bit of tension and we had some huge rows because of it.
we stayed together for around 2 years but in the end all the agro from his mam got too much for me (that and his lack of a spine!!) so we split.

you've said yourself that you dont have a problem with it and your opinion should be the only one that matters.

as for your mates....of course they'll rip the piss out of ya, thats what mates do.

Jonny Arson

As the saying goes ''age is just a number''. There is only a four year or so age gap between you guys so whats the problem. As long as you are happy together and in love, age makes no difference at all.

koneko

Jesus, Zane, are you kidding with that sig?

dope, I really wouldn't worry about it, as others have said. It's not a big gap, and she's not that young, so enjoy it and don't worry

BolBill

Im 35 and my girlfriend is 17

KlodaX

I saw someone who was 17 when I was 14, 23 when I was 19 and others inbetween and since. I am now 23, 24 in August and my boyfriend is 21 next month. To be honest maturity really depends on the individual. I'm pretty sure my current man is more mature than the last person I saw who was the same age as me. Most of my associates are in their late 20s with a fair few having the maturity level of a teenager. Maturity comes from life experience ... some experience life more than others, regardless of age. If you where to limit yourself to people the exact same age as yourself you are ruling out alot of hopefulls.

Kell

dope wrote:

I'm 22 and my girlfriend is 18, my problem is i'm 23 this month and she is 19 in May, am i being a bit of a fool going out with someone so much younger than me?? She doesnt see it as a problem and i dont really either but was wondering what other people think. My mam keeps tellin me she is too young for me and all that crap, so she is getting taughts into my head

Cheers

What acceptable is you doing a 'lil search for similar posts of which there are 100's regarding the same topic as opposed to wasting your and everyone elses time.

K-

Kingsize

Im 35 & my g/f is 25 it dont make a difference but speaking from experience it seems to matter more when you are in your early 20's.

Btw i love the expressions on the crowds faces in that cantona pic!!!

azezil

24, dated a an 18yr old for 4 months... the age difference didn't bother me at first but as the months went on little things used to get on my nerves.


I wouldn't hesitate to date another 18yr old though, may not be the most emotionally stable or mentally stimulating but they do have, other, desireable attributes.

combs

dope wrote:

I'm 22 and my girlfriend is 18, my problem is i'm 23 this month and she is 19 in May, am i being a bit of a fool going out with someone so much younger than me?? She doesnt see it as a problem and i dont really either but was wondering what other people think. My mam keeps tellin me she is too young for me and all that crap, so she is getting taughts into my head

Cheers

I'm just guessing but maybe your mother just doesn't like her, or simply doesn't like the idea of another woman, and is using the age as an excuse! I find it hard to believe that she'd see anything wrong with 22-18=4. That nonsense only matters to self-conscious 18-22 year-olds, many of whom have a startling knack of pre-empting their happiness by worrying about such things.

4 years isn't really a gap IMO.

Go for it, don't allow anyone else's ideas to conflict your own.

Cianan2

Half your age plus seven. Thats an old rule we used to go by.....So,shes grand!! Tell your mates this rule,and you're sorted.

azezil

Cianan2 wrote:

Half your age plus seven. Thats an old rule we used to go by.....So,shes grand!! Tell your mates this rule,and you're sorted.

heh just heard that phrase for the first time last weekend... well he turned out to be a little younger than that :P

arbeitsscheuer

My bruv is 29 and his gf is 22 this year. They's been going out for almost 4 years now, and are probably gonna get engaged some time soon (as in, the next 6 months or so)...

Just reading the age gap, it does look kinda horrible, but in reality they are pretty much at the same level of maturity (my bruv always was a bit slow just kiddin)... That's probably why we've always got on so well, despite there bein 10 years between us.

I reckon age gaps matter less as you get older, but more when you're just developing, i.e. 13-20 years old.

E.g. A 14 yr old going out wit a 20 year old. euwwww.
But a 25 year old with a 31 year old? Not so euwww...

ether

My gf's 9 years older than me, read the sig

damnyanks

The law states* it is half your age + 7 = lowest age to date someone.

ether

OMG what do I do?

Victor

damnyanks wrote:

The law states*

I think you meant to clarify that as "the rule of thumbs states ....."

FatherTed

I've been married to my wife for 9 years. Who is 6 years older than me. We met when we were both in our 20's. Maybe it's different if she is still a teenager.

But really, age is just a number. What matters is what's inyour head and your heart.