Grandmother Has Cancer

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I found out yesterday that my 80 year old Grandmother has cancer of the Womb.

She is my Mother's Mother, and understandably my Mother is quite upset about this.

The docs have only told my Grandmother that she has an "infection" in her womb and needs a Hysterectomy. If the cancer is more widespread she will then be informed. I'm sure they will have to tell her anyway, I don't really understand why they have not told her now?

I hope that they have it in time, but I also understand that she has had a very long and fulfilling life. Both my Grandfathers were lost to this disease some years ago too (obv not of the womb).

When my dad told me, I reacted in a very blasé way - "Oh my god" - and said nothing else. After a few minutes, I asked how my mother was, he told me she was upset.

I am not that close to her, but she is my Grandmother after all, and I would miss her of course if she left us.

I don't know if I am looking for advise as such, I'm sure other people have experience of this.

What can I do to help my mam through her distress, my dad too.

I hate cancer, it has affected the lives of so many people I know.

cajun_tiger

i hate cancer as much as you have lost enough and seen the suffering of too many.

my nan has it of the linph's, her son age twenty dies at age 40 4 years ago and her brother passed away last year, same cancer. now shes near on 80 herself and i can understand why they wouldn't tell your nan, its alot to take on and since her husband died of it she probably has a very negitive idea on it.

removing the womb at her age wont be too bad at all. i wish her the best of luck, all i do have to say is 4 years ago my nan was given months to live, shes now still playing her 18 holes of golf as much asshe can, and has diabities on top of it.

CathyMoran

I lost my maternal grandmother to skin cancer after a 15 year battle - she had a very long and fulfilling life during that time and died at the ripe old age of 89 Cancer is never easy but it does not have to be a life sentence - a wake up call maybe. Just be nice to your mum and dad - that is all that is needed at the moment - she will let you know if she needs to talk. Cancer is tough at any age but you have to remind yourself that your grandmother is having a full life, a cousin died from cancer last year at 42 leaving a young family. My mum never told her mum that she had cancer, but she discussed it with me - she just did not want to hurt mum...but it is better not to mention cancer unless your mum thinks you should - some people can take a cancer diagnosis in the wrong way wheras in most cases it is treatable.

shelly04

My grandad was very ill for about 5 months with cancer he died 21st jan 02, that was still a shock even though we knew for ages he wouldnt get better. My nana lokked awful at the funeral,naturally enough so everyone thought anyway....even my dad, but a few days later was admitted to hospital as she was worried about dropping 2 stone in a month and a half, they did tests and gave her the all clear and discharged her but within a few days she was back in, turned out she had cancer too, my nanas brother didnt want the doctors to tell her, but the doctor said it was the patients right to know, they told her and she died two weeks later.. 26th/feb/02. a month and 5 days after my grandad, although i miss both of them a lot, she didnt really suffer as much as my grandad, personally i think that the chemo,even though it helped him live longer,didnt seem worth it. my nana sadly didnt live long enough to recieve chemo but seemed to be more 'her' when she died.
that said my auntie was diagnosed with breast cancer, recieved her chemo and radiothearphy and shes fine now, thank god.
I think the best you can do for your parents is just be there for them,and talk to them, dont shut down and pretend it isnt happening.

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Well, my Gran had her operation, and they found more of the stuff inside her.

Very hard time for my mam and her siblings.

I don't know if they'll bother treating her now or not.

*adele*

yea my mam came close will u be ok?

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I'll be ok, just hate seeing my mam so upset.

*adele*

yea i kno its like ur life changes really really quick

CathyMoran

I am sorry to hear that they found more cancer - they can still do a lot nowadays but do make the most of your time with her. My gran had cancer for years and I saw what my mum and her siblings went through at the time. It is never easy coping with a serious illness - the best thing to do is take your mums lead on what to talk about and when. Best wishes.

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I hope you all don't mind me dragging this up yet again.

Well, she is still in hospital, and a couple of things have happened.

She was supposed to be going to a convalescent(sp?) home last week, but she was on a drip, and when they were changing it, the tip of the part in her arm broke off, while still inside her arm.

The nurse didn't notice, and the arm started to swell up and bruise, it wasn't until she had an x-ray the next day that they saw it, so she had to have another op to take that out. Then they removed something else from her arm, that the docs said was "diseased muscle tissue", which we all took as more cancer. Turned out it was just clotted blood. :eek:

Someone from the Convalescent home told her she was first on the list for a bed there, then told her a few days later that in fact she was not even on the list yet, and would be a few more days until she could move.

In the intervening days she has contracted that "hospital super-bug" thing, so she can't leave the hospital until that clears.

She is still in good spirits all the same, I don't know how.