What think ye of my TV show ideas?

therecklessone

Thinking of doing a submission to RTE for their Autumn scedule next year. Here's some of the ideas I've had...

Beggar Wars - Sort of a cross between Series 7 The Contenders and Treasure Hunt (minus Anneka Rice's arse). Crack teams of beggars (Romanys, Pavees, and the homeless) in a fight to the death on Dublin streets. Not only do they have to collect loose change off the general public, but they have to wipe their opposition out as well. Could be spiced up by guest appearances from Nigerian ATM card swipers and Russian mafia types.

Indicate Ya' Bast*rd - Gatling guns are placed on prominent roundabouts throughout the country, drivers who fail to indicate on said roundabouts will be swept off the road in a hail of gunfire for everyone's entertainment. Could be pitched as an educational effort (who'll forget the Rules of the Road after one episode of this?). Could become a long running series, branching off into Look Left AND Right Ya' Bast*rd (the Safe Cross Code Strikes Back) and Wear a Light at Night Ya Cyclist Bast*rd.

I was also thinking of a scanger fashion show. Looking at all the latest trends in tracksuits, hoopy earrings, and manky baby's names, I was thinking of modelling it on RTE's current fashion show Off the Rails, only renaming it Off The Back of a Lorry.

I'm also looking at developing a replacement show for the Afternoon Show. It'll be along similar lines, three middle-aged geebags sitting on a sofa talking about knitting and ponys only for one third of the budget and 100 times the production values.

What yis think?

aphex™

therecklessone wrote:

I was also thinking of a scanger fashion show. Looking at all the latest trends in tracksuits, hoopy earrings, and manky baby's names, I was thinking of modelling it on RTE's current fashion show Off the Rails, only renaming it Off The Back of a Lorry.

Yeah they do that on ID from time to time.

How about Series 8: the Skangers?
Or Series 8: I'm a Ryan Tubridy- blow my head off

Lafortezza

therecklessone wrote:

the Afternoon Show. It'll be along similar lines, three middle-aged geebags sitting on a sofa talking
What yis think?

How could you improve on the current 3 geebags? Who would you choose?

And have you any ideas for sporting coverage?

therecklessone

lafortezza wrote:

How could you improve on the current 3 geebags? Who would you choose?

I was thinking of making it a roving, round-the-country show, with ordinary geebags appearing each week. What could work better than Mrs O'Reilly and her two Legion of Mary neighbours discussing Varicose Veins and "the change"?

lafortezza wrote:

And have you any ideas for sporting coverage?

I do. Bare-knuckle fist-fighting, live from Dunsink Lane. They could pretend they were at a wedding. Which leads me on to another great idea...

A documentary on slash hooks - Seriously, who makes these? More importantly, who sells them? And if you happened to sell them, what would you're response be to Mossy coming into the shop and shouting "all right Boss, have ye any slash hooks?"

On another sporting theme, I was thinking of a show called Boy Racer, a day in the life of a Civic driver. Sort of a homegrown motorsports show.

On another note, how about a native Pimp My Ride? Hosted by Shane Lynch, he could call 'round to unsuspecting random punters and completely pimp up their Nissan Micras and Fiat Seicentos. Total class like.

The piece de resistance will be our own version of I'm a Celebrity...set in Lillies Bordello, it'll give all the usual C-Listers a chance to resurrect their careers...Barry from Fair City, Fidelma from Glenroe, Pamela Flood, Anne Doyle, Darina Allen's paedo husband, Samantha Mumba's nobody brother. Imagine the hours of quality entertainment that would give us. But who'll be our Ant and Dec? Zig and Zag?

BlitzKrieg

does slydice get the tv after midnight to show off his wonderfull collection?

Big Ears

therecklessone wrote:

our Ant and Dec? Zig and Zag?

Anto and Deco , de boyz from deee streeeeht

Crucifix

therecklessone wrote:

Indicate Ya' Bast*rd - Gatling guns are placed on prominent roundabouts throughout the country, drivers who fail to indicate on said roundabouts will be swept off the road in a hail of gunfire for everyone's entertainment.

I'm all for this one, but why limit to roundabouts

BuffyBot

Don't give up the day job, whatever that is.

I think I can safely say comedy writer isn't it.

Hobbes

How about "Beat the Racist" where we tie you up in a sack and all the people you just slagged off get to beat you with axe handles.

therecklessone

Hobbes wrote:

How about "Beat the Racist" where we tie you up in a sack and all the people you just slagged off get to beat you with axe handles.

What, all the people? The boy racers, sh*t drivers, c-list celebrities and menopausal aul wans included? :rolleyes:

Garcon, sense of humour for table 2!

therecklessone

Crucifix wrote:

I'm all for this one, but why limit to roundabouts

From little acorns great oak trees grow...

therecklessone

BlitzKrieg wrote:

does slydice get the tv after midnight to show off his wonderfull collection?

Did you really need to ask?

therecklessone

BuffyBot wrote:

Don't give up the day job, whatever that is.

Wouldn't dream of it, pays far too well...

Draupnir

Magnet & Steel

Dr. Dre

Indicate Ya' Bast*rd - Gatling guns are placed on prominent roundabouts throughout the country, drivers who fail to indicate on said roundabouts will be swept off the road in a hail of gunfire for everyone's entertainment. Could be pitched as an educational effort (who'll forget the Rules of the Road after one episode of this?). Could become a long running series, branching off into Look Left AND Right Ya' Bast*rd (the Safe Cross Code Strikes Back) and Wear a Light at Night Ya Cyclist Bast*rd.

That's the money right there, though I would like to see it include dopes who drive around with their foglights on (if anyone deserves death, these do).

"Inner city sumo?"
"Monkey Tennis?"

Piste

Pitch a ten year old scumbag with a sharpened spoon against a D4 rugby player with a pen-knife and see who'll win.

crazy angel

id watch your show! in fact it sounds so good i might just get my tv fixed so i could watch it!

Gummybearz!!!

Gummybearz!!! wrote:

Pitch a ten year old scumbag with a sharpened spoon against a D4 rugby player with a pen-knife and see who'll win.

Well I'd watch it, even if it is reality TV...

Kingsize

seriously some of you guys must be workin for channnel 5.
How about "rat race" its a kind of cross between the crystal maze,i
m a celebrity & blind date.a group of "celebrity" "love rats" e.g Darren day,brian macfatten,John thompson,James nesbitt,angus deaton , john leslie etc etc
are locked in a compond for a fortnight & have to compete in tasks accumulating points as they go,there are individual & team excercises individual tasks may be "ironic".The public votes to take points away & those below the threshold are FUkked out with the threshold rising as the show progresses.
the overall winner is the one with the most points & the prize is a night with a choice of one of many Willing females who are desperate to get on tv at any price & have put their names forward

ionapaul

Some ideas sound crazy - BUT if ten years ago someone told you, 'in the near future there'll be a show focused on people who think they're ugly and who receive free plastic surgery to *beautify* themselves', you'd have called them looney. And yet the Swan exists!
Something like the Running Man would be entertaining...we are not so debauched yet. I think a reality show following around college students trying to score in Tramco or the Palace (is it still a nightclub?) would be grand funking railroad hilarious.

BolBill

How about :

ANNABELLES FIGHT CLUB : Team up a group of Rugby playing "jocks" against one other "jock" from another school. Let five of them take on the one hapless "jock" and see who wins. The winner is whoevers Daddy keeps their son out of prison. Entrants from Foxrock need no apply as it would simply be unfair.

DECENTRALISATION : A new game for all the (Civil Servant) Family. Start with a group of Dublin employees that have worked for years in their City Centre location. Then, one day, just move their jobs a hundred miles away to a backward area of the country without telling them and just announce it on the radio. The winner is the last employee not to question the governments motive.

REALITY TV - DESIGN A SYSTEM : This show follows a group of computer "experts" who have to come up with a system of counting votes entered by a large number of users. This fascinating series shows how simply 50 million Euro can be spend on something that simply doesn't work. There are no winners on this show, everybody loses though.

ionapaul

Controversial

therecklessone

BolBill wrote:

How about :


DECENTRALISATION : A new game for all the (Civil Servant) Family. Start with a group of Dublin employees that have worked for years in their City Centre location. Then, one day, just move their jobs a hundred miles away to a backward area of the country without telling them and just announce it on the radio. The winner is the last employee not to question the governments motive.

Nice.

On a similar note, how about we replace the General Election with a massive 5 year game of Big Brother. It would boost voting figures, raise extra revenue for the state coffers (50c a text message) and provide us with lasting entertainment.

Some highlights:

Brian Cowen and Mata Harney having a cuddle in the shower... :eek:

Michael D Higgins getting his head kicked in by any number of "deputies" (Sinn Fein, I'm looking in your direction for this one... )

A special dodgy pub/amusement arcade for the handing over of plain brown envelopes of cash.

Imagine the fun of the diary room!!! Bertie F'in and B'in out of him...

Cactus Col

All hilarious, guffaw guffaw, etc.

they are crap.

ionapaul

Cactus Col wrote:

All hilarious, guffaw guffaw, etc.

they are crap.

Maybe you're crap, huh?

Now that's a title waiting for a television show! 'Maybe You're Crap, Huh' - after all, since 'Who Wants To Be A Millionare' hit prime time, I think title-as-question shows are ready for total domination.

BolBill

ionapaul wrote:

Maybe you're crap, huh?

Now that's a title waiting for a television show! 'Maybe You're Crap, Huh' - after all, since 'Who Wants To Be A Millionare' hit prime time, I think title-as-question shows are ready for total domination.

Maybe he's an idiot, sounds better

crazy angel

ha ha lol

Sposs

Give Mondo more airtime he's rapid. :rolleyes:

Cactus Col

BolBill wrote:

Maybe he's an idiot, sounds better

Maybe I am, but maybe I'm right.

BolBill

Sposs wrote:

Give Mondo more airtime he's rapid. :rolleyes:

Give him some jail time more like !!!!!!

Kingsize

how about mondo versus kevo in a pathetic attempt to do an irish celebrity
boxing show..even if it were shyte youd at least see them beatin the crap out of each other

jester77

I reckon we should have a show called "Pimp my Bitch"... this could involve taking a skanger and try and pimp her up a bit.... or maybe all those fat burds who think they look great in a mini skirt and tight top with a flabby belly hanging out!! So much potential....

Keyzer

How about "Car Wars"....
Fit three peoples cars with blades on the wheels for slicing down silly pedestrians and miniguns on top for destroying idiot drivers. I would gleefully participate.

"Skang Fights" - The object of the game is to start a fight with anyone for the most ridiculous reason, winner gets a new pair of air max and 20 blue.

"I'm an employee, get me out of here" - Employee's try any means neccesary to get sacked form their current ****ty job.