Totally Despondent

dragona

I have had it up to here.
My husband lost his job in August, and had to wait a month before finding work. I lost my job (closed down) in July and have only recently started to work, very few hours, not enough money.
I am in despair - my ESB bill has come in at E400, 200 of which carried over from last time as I couldn't pay.Cant pay now either.
Mega overdrawn at bank - they will not up the overdraft. Rent due next week will be paid but will leave me fully overdrawn to my limit again.
My kids are eating toast and jacket potatos for dinner every night, I have not bought ONE gift for them for Christmas.
I literally have no money for food (I mean proper food, not just toast)
I can just see no way out of this mess.
My teeth are aching and I can't go to the GP.
I am so so fed up I want to crawl into a corner and just cry for days.

Oryx

Go to the ESB tell them whats going on. They will make a payment plan for you. They are not in the business of putting people in the dark unless all else fails. The VdeP are great at helping out people in circumstances like you, dont know where you are, so dont know your local branch. They dont judge, honestly, I used to work with them. Also talk to social welfare, sounds like you could get Family Income Support, or tax credit breaks that could help. Your local clinic usually has an emergency payment system for when your stuck like this but Im not totally familiar with how it works. Do you think there is a point in talking to your bank? Maybe they can arrange cheaper borrowing than an overdraft. There is also MABS (Money advice and budgeting service) www.mabs.ie who will help negotiate repayment plans with people you owe money to and help you budget as well.

You have options. Dont panic, the time of year doesnt help, but you will get past this.

vibe666

I can't stress this enogh that you have to speak to the people involved (ESB, other bills) and explain things to them. If you don't they'll just follow procedure and do what big businesses do to the little people when they're not getting what they want. If you speak to them and put a human voice on things you may be able to get some leeway. Show willing and they will follow suit.

Do you live in Dublin? MABS on Lombard St. opposite the General Registers Office, just off Pearse St. is a government funded office to help people cope with debt.

this is from their website www.mabs.ie

The primary aim of MABS is to help people cope
with debt and to take control of their own finances.

The service is free, confidential and independent

Funded by the Department of Social & Family Affairs

Hopefully they shoulod be able to help you with your current debts.

Now, to help you keep things from getting any worse, are you in dublin? If you are (and no doubt if you're not) there are plenty of people looking for waitresses/waiters for xmas parties etc. If you can do silver service and have some experience you can get €100 for 6 hours work in a number of places around the city. Admittedly it's not the best work in the world, but the money is good if you can put up with it, and it sounds like you're pretty desperate so I thought I'd throw it out there.

I'm PM'ing you my email address and my girlfriends (she works at a hospitality recruitment agency, and they have quite a lot of work going). I can't promise anything, but we might be able to get you something to keep you going.

I know it's not easy, but don't give up. I know you hate not being able to feed your kids properly or get them prezzies, but they'll understand. I know I did. I was 10 when we got really poor, and you might think I'm making it up, but I swear on my mothers life (there was just the two of us) she would send me into the fields (thankfully we were in the countryside) to pick spuds for dinner almost every night at one point and another time we even had pheasant which had met an untimely end under the car one night. It was tasty too after it had been dangling in the shed for a couple of days, even though I wasn't chuffed at the idea initially.

Be strong, there's always a way through it even if you can't see it right now. just have a little faith in yourself, and what you can do if you put your mind to it.

Now if you're not in dublin then I can't help on the job front at all, but I can bet you won't need to go far to get bar/waitressing work if you call round all your local pubs and resteraunts, and MABS have offices all over the country.

Keep your chin up.

Victor

Talk to your local Community Welfare Officer, they will be able to give you support in the form of Supplementary Welfare Allowance, which should mean food on your table and help with the rent and electricity (special payments can be made in winter). There is also a clothing allowance. You may be entitled to a medical card.

Talk to MABS (I imagine they have quite a few offices). They are familiar with this type of situation and will know who to talk to about bills, social welfare and yes the St Vincent de Paul.

You don't have to look at this as taking charity, look at it as a no-pressure loan that you can repay when you are back on your feet.

Talk to your pharmacist about the tooth ache.

the_syco

dragona wrote:

My teeth are aching and I can't go to the GP.

People sometimes grind their teeth in their sleep, if they're stressed. Talk to your pharmacist about it, and they may be able to help.

On the jobs front, goto your local Social Welfare office. They're nice people, and they'll help you if they can. Also, as well as helping you on the money front, they may be able to help you get a better job. Finally, sign up with Fas. Explain your situation (you may need to talk to a Fas officer), and they may be able to help get you a job.

Chin up. The worst has past. Both of you now have jobs, so go from here, and not from your past.

DundalkDuffman

You don't say whether or not you are religious but in know in some cases your parish may be able to help you also. Possibly talk to your parish priest or curate. They may at least be able to give you a different view on things.

Victor

Oh, one more thing. You sound like you should sit down with someone and have a cup of tea and talk .

dragona

Thanks for all your replies.

dragona

To those of you who have pm'd me, thank you - your kind words have helped and I will reply in a bit.