fed up

LegacyUser

hey there

i've been feeling really down, empty, desperate for the past year or so and have been seeing a psychiatrist and counsellor and taking antidepressants. nothing seems to do any good though. it's not just depression though, a lot of it stems from completely hating myself and having no confidence at all, so even around people who are really good friends i can't even look them in the eye. every day i go over all the times i have done stupid things or made mistakes in my head and i can't stop thinking about them. i've tried the whole keeping busy and going to the gym a few times a week thing, as well as all the professional help and nothing seems to be working. i don't really know whats left for me to try but i hate feeling like this, it hurts so much....'

The_Goose

I ve been there maye, its like looking back at everything you ve done and only seein the bad things! i went so far as to look to the future and couldnt see anything to look foward too!
Now drugs, doctors all that can ease it but its basicly all down to you!You see yourself in a certain way and it ll stay that way until you start thinking differently about yourself! Weather you dont like yourself because of your looks,(goin to gym) something you did or said, you have to just let it go(easier said than done i know) start again! I m sure there s something you ve alwaya wanted to do, well do it! Go traveling, learn a new language fall in love, You are the only one who can help you!!
I m sure there s something right around the corner!

Be well

John

banquo

feddup wrote:

hey there

i've been feeling really down, empty, desperate for the past year or so'

you did well going to the gym a few times a week. and generally keeping busy. yet it seems that nothing has worked?

so... what happened a year ago?

BolBill

The_Goose wrote:

I ve been there maye, its like looking back at everything you ve done and only seein the bad things! i went so far as to look to the future and couldnt see anything to look foward too!
Now drugs, doctors all that can ease it but its basicly all down to you!You see yourself in a certain way and it ll stay that way until you start thinking differently about yourself! Weather you dont like yourself because of your looks,(goin to gym) something you did or said, you have to just let it go(easier said than done i know) start again! I m sure there s something you ve alwaya wanted to do, well do it! Go traveling, learn a new language fall in love, You are the only one who can help you!!
I m sure there s something right around the corner!

Be well

John

Listen to him mate, thats good advice there.

Beruthiel

feddup wrote:

a lot of it stems from completely hating myself

why do you hate yourself?

LegacyUser

i don't know why i hate myself....it's irrational and everything but i still feel that way. i do stupid things, say stupid things, i'm selfish and always think of myself when i should think of other people. i hate the way i look too (i'm not overweight though so it's not simply a case of losing weight that might make things better).

to answer banquo's question, nothing happened a year ago. i've always felt this way i guess but it hasn't bothered me or got in the way of anything, but it's been getting progressively worse.

anyway thanks for your comments guys, guess i just have to try and keep plugging away.

thanks for listening

Oryx

feddup wrote:

i don't know why i hate myself....it's irrational and everything but i still feel that way. i do stupid things, say stupid things, i'm selfish and always think of myself when i should think of other people. i hate the way i look too (i'm not overweight though so it's not simply a case of losing weight that might make things better).

to answer banquo's question, nothing happened a year ago. i've always felt this way i guess but it hasn't bothered me or got in the way of anything, but it's been getting progressively worse.

anyway thanks for your comments guys, guess i just have to try and keep plugging away.

thanks for listening

You are not stupid. You only say or do stupid things in your own eyes. You are normal, if you could only see inside everyone elses head you would realise that we all feel stupid sometimes and we all have our insecurities. You sound as if you have no confidence, as if you are not entitled to think of yourself, well you are! If youve always felt like this, please realise that there is a better way to regard yourself and you are worth more. I know this wont happen overnight maybe try changing some of the things you do, try voluntary work, join a club, see yourself differently, and meet different people who wont prejudge you. I really hope things improve for you, best of luck

tribble

I have a bunch of questions fore you.

1. What age are you (roughly)?
2. Are you in college/work?
3. Do you have a girlfriend? Ever?
4. 1-10 how would you rate your looks.

LegacyUser

i'm early 20's
im in college and work part time
i'm a girl. single at moment but have had a boyf
looks maybe 5 or 6 out of 10

tribble wrote:

I have a bunch of questions fore you.

1. What age are you (roughly)?
2. Are you in college/work?
3. Do you have a girlfriend? Ever?
4. 1-10 how would you rate your looks.

Ren0

feddup wrote:

a lot of it stems from completely hating myself

Maybe you don't actually hate yourself, maybe u hate some1 else who always knocks u down.

Find some1 who likes u, a friend or an admirer perhaps. listen to all, the good things they have to say about U.

and if all else fails, don't forget that Barney The Dinosaur loves you.

If u can't find any1 i'm sure some1 on the forum who lives near u would gladly meet up with u and talk face to face.

LegacyUser

thanks again for all the help guys *much appreciated*

the weird thing is, my friends are great they are always telling me how funny/intelligent/great taste etc. i have, i'm just so uncomfortable receiving compliments!!

thanks again

Chad ghostal

feddup wrote:

i don't know why i hate myself....it's irrational and everything but i still feel that way. i do stupid things, say stupid things, i'm selfish and always think of myself when i should think of other people. i hate the way i look too (i'm not overweight though so it's not simply a case of losing weight that might make things better).

I Used to be the exact same way (still am, but slightly less). The only way i've found of actually getting past this is to drop the crap things i saw myself doing, or saying in the past, or at least rationalise them as best as possible, in order to be able to let them go.

The self conciousness of saying the wrong thing, or doing the wrong thing was often the cause of me doing or saying the wrong thing..
i know its not going to be easy, but you have to find a way to let those things go and not to think about what other people think of you.

im not sure if im the best person to be giving advice since im pretty much the same way, but i think/hope im getting better; and into a slightly healthier situation.

best of luck

kensutz

I've been sorta through this myself but with not going to see anyone about how I was feeling etc. The way I came around this is that I didn't think of anything negative, I was probably the most miserable person you could've met at the time but I thought that it wasn't worth it trying to put myself down. Now I travel every weekend to Norwich to see my fave team play, I enjoy talking to people in work and basically all the negative thoughts I had in my head are gone. I'm still single myself which is a bit of a bitch but it's not the end of the world. I suppose I'm happier now than when I was with the girl I was last seeing, who now is after trying to make her way through all the fellas on the shift probably as a way to get my attention but now I laugh at her making a fool of herself.

Victor

feddup wrote:

i've been feeling really down, empty, desperate for the past year

I've been there for 4 years, thing have got better.

nothing seems to do any good though.

Anti-depressants aren't a "cure", they are there to give you time to recover.

Tell us more.