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Relocation with a child abroad- getting permission from court

  • 18-01-2024 9:51pm
    Registered Users Posts: 3

    Need advice please.

    I am starting separation process with my husband. I am Polish, he is italian, married in Ireland, son 4 years old born here.

    I wish to relocate with my Son back home to Poland where all my family and support is there. I have nobody here, i am on my own. I dont have help and for now my husb still lives here in a family home but already doing less at home & helping and looking after kid less.

    I work full time, but not making enough (less than 2500net) to pay mortgage, bills, cover after school, adidtional days if kido is sick, insurance etc. When my ex will move out in the future will be very hard, mortgage will go up on variable rates as well

    There is no option of living together separated.

    I gave couple of option to my Husband.

    -Sell home & share whatever is afrter sale and myslef will relocate- refused by him

    - he buys me out & i relocate. He agreed firstly but he changed his mind after bank refused his Mommy on taking over mortgage due to age.

    He wrote me on the email i can relocate even tomorrow if i leave home with my name on the mortgage.😀 as he needs a house for our son to have a plce to stay on holidays..

    Coupd you please tell me how can i approach this situation? There are no many court cases in this subject. Found one from northern ireland, polish woman was granted permission of staying in Poland with child despite father's dissaproval.

    I really believe my child wpuld have a better future in Poland, full family, feee school & college& medical treatments. For the father i offer anytime he wants, summers, winter holidays, it is only 1.5h flight and i would offer him a room.

    What can I do?


  • Registered Users Posts: 347 ✭✭iniscealtra

    A child needs both their parents. It would be preferable if you both live nearby to raise him together. Sell the house, split the money and live in the same area. Share childcare.

  • Registered Users Posts: 3 foreignmotherinireland

    Selling the house and going both of us for renting its not the best option. First of all my full income would go for rent if i am lucky to find, same for daddy.

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,406 ✭✭✭XsApollo

    Well the one thing there is he said you can relocate if you just leave your name on the mortgage?

    What kind of equity is in the house? If there is no profit from the sale, then it wouldn’t really matter then if it’s sold or not?

    if you are relocating then I presume you have no intention of returning.

    you could agree and then deal with it in a few years.

    if he does agree to let you relocate with yer child then get it legally signed.

    If ye can’t agree on anything then you need to talk to a solicitor, which will then probably go to the courts and the judge will decide.

    My own opinion, if there isn’t massive money in the house after it’s sold then do as offered and you get what you want also.

  • Registered Users Posts: 3 foreignmotherinireland

    Thanks for replay.

    Dont know precisely how much would be, I believe after paying off the mortgage around 100k? Maybe less if there are any other fees I dont know about.

    40k would buy me half of nice apartment in my home. I can't leve my name on mortgage either as I will be not able to take mortgage myslef at home in my country.

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,213 ✭✭✭Ezeoul

    You will both need professional legal advice. A few things to think about here:

    In relation to the house -

    The only way for your name to be taken of the mortgage in Ireland is if either (a) the house is sold and the mortgage repaid and the equity split or (b) your ex can raise a big enough mortgage in his own right to buy you out of your share.

    A bank will not take you off the mortgage any other way, and a Court cannot order them to do so.

    In relation to your child:

    1. Both you and your ex are equally joint guardians of your child.
    2. Your child has a right to a relationship with both parents, and the Court will seek to uphold this
    3. In order to relocate your child to another country, you need either - (a) your ex's consent OR (b) you can make an application to the Court for a waiver of guardian's consent.

    If your ex does consent, I would advise getting it in writing and visit a solicitor together to get an agreement witnessed / notarised.

    If you need to apply for a waiver of consent to permanently reclocate your child - in my experience, these are extremely rarely granted. But if you wanted to try and make a case for it, you need to have a detailed plan in place on why you think it is in the child's best interest (not yours), how you intend to facilitate the continuing relationship between the parent here, and the child. This would include a plan on how you would make parenting decisions, how you would maintain regular contact between the parent and child, and of course regular travel back to Ireland for visits - and as you are the one moving away, you would be expected to travel back with the child, and bear the costs involved.

    He wrote me on the email i can relocate even tomorrow if i leave home with my name on the mortgage.😀 as he needs a house for our son to have a plce to stay on holidays..

    Keep that email. He may not have meant it that way, but it could be construed as him trying to barter his consent for your share of the house.

    Post edited by Ezeoul on

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