Loneliness at work

dublin_Horse

Hi.

I currently work shift work and the section I'm in there are 12 of us but we don't work together or hardly see each other due to the nature of the shifts.

I hate it and feel very isolated. There is another section where I am quite friendly with some of them and they go to the pub together but are very clickey. I have met 2 of them there before when I just wanted to get grub and get out of work for headspace. One of them sat with me but it felt like he didn't want to.

I met them again two weeks ago briefly and one of them made a remark that I was trying to get in with the chosen few. Am I reading too much into that remark or is it that I was basically told to f**k off. I can't stop thinking about it.

mcgragger

is it a union ran place you work?

maninasia

Get a different job and better to not be shift work I reckon . You aren't happy with it. What would change if your coworkers changed ?

I know easier said than done..I guess you are young enough still.

Xterminator

hi op.

some jobs just are a better fit for any individual - eg you.

is there any obstacle to your changing job? could you maybe do a few interviews, get a feel for how friendly the places are before you decide to change? i worked nights myself and found it challenging because i had outside interests and they were not on shifts/weekend work. so i was isolated that way.

dunno if this is practical depending on your location and industry. in my case i did college part-time and changed my career. got away from shiftwork altogether.

thefa

I met them again two weeks ago briefly and one of them made a remark that I was trying to get in with the chosen few. Am I reading too much into that remark or is it that I was basically told to f**k off. I can't stop thinking about it.

I think only you know the exact words, tone, character of the person, etc to make a call on that. I can see how it can be perceived negatively unless the person is of a teasing nature or self-deprecating.

If they really disliked you though, why would they even be arsed sitting with you or anything beyond niceties? It seems to matter a good bit to you and this can come across too. Maybe the reality is somewhere in between.

Both at work and outside of work, cliques can be difficult to get into particularly if they’re well established and comfy. Your shifts don’t naturally align so that’s a natural barrier.

Reesy

Sorry to hear that. Sounds like your work is a tough place to make friends. Can you work on meeting soe new people outside work? That might help with the loneliness and also make you more relaxed at work. Good luck.