Had two dates, no third date request

bvc456

Hi, I have a small problem with a guy I met on tinder. He messaged me first on the app, we texted a little and then switched to another communication app. We've already been on two dates, both lasted over 4 hours & on the second he already initiated hello/goodbye cheek kisses. He was also moving closer to me when we were sitting so it seems like he likes me.

The problem is I was always the one who suggested/brought up the topic of spending time together. He would plan only after I mentioned us going on a date, which I did two times already and I think it's his turn now. After the dates he usually texts me every few days, we exchange messages and then nothing. After a few days I reach out, a little back and forth with small talk and then still nothing. Then he texts first again. It's been over two weeks and he hasn't asked me out on the third date. Is he shy or just keeping me around as an option/ego boost? I feel like at this point if he wanted to ask me out he would.. Is he not into me? I don't wanna communicate that to him directly because I don't want to end up with a half-hearted guy later. It's a turn-off to me that he never says 'let's go do this or that', 'how about we go x and y' or just plain & simple 'do you want to go out again?'. Instead he just asks how things are going etc. I'm thinking of dropping it and moving on but at the same time scared of losing an opportunity. I've considered unmatching him because I got irritated by him only texting. Then I thought it out and decided not to do it and give him the benefit of the doubt.

What's interesting is that a few days ago he has unmatched me and I was surprised (he was the one who texted me before that on the other communication app). Prior to that I noticed he removed one sentence from his profile description. Did he unmatch to hide that he's changing his profile or is he just giving me a major hint that he's not interested? It's just kind of weird to me why he would do that because the only time I unmatch someone is if they really pissed me off or if I feel absolutely zero attraction to them but in the latter case I usually don't do it just not to be mean.

89897

You dont want a half heart-hearted guy but you already have that. To me he doesnt seem interested so you have 2 options.

Ask him if hes interested and relay your concerns. He'll either pick up the slack or not but at least one way you'll know.

Or

Stop texting and see if he does. Either way you'll know his intentions.

Also theres no good in over analyze or reading too much into sentence changes etc, it'll only drive you mad. Take action if you want something.

Tork

If you decide to ask him straight out if he's interested, there's a possibility he won't give you a straight answer or an honest one. Just something to keep in mind if you opt to go this route.

To be honest, it looks like he's not all that interested. Be careful not to fall into the trap of making excuses for him (i.e. he's shy, he's busy) or over-analyzing things such as that sentence.

Princess Calla

I'm sorry but "he's just not that into you".

We've all been there.

In my experience (and I've had alot of experience 😂) when a guy is into you they make an effort. Tbh it shouldn't even be an effort , when both people are on the same page it should just glide along.

Cut your loses , it's only been 2 dates. Don't drag the arse out of it.

YellowLead

Agree with the others, he’s just not that into you. He thinks you’re alright so he’ll plod along if you push, until he meets somebody else. If he was updating his profile after you met, he was clearly looking to match with others.

It happens all the time with OD - a couple of dates mean nothing and plenty are multi dating until they meet somebody that really takes their fancy. When a guy is interested he makes an effort.