Separation Advice

randomaccount1

Recently and a bit out of the blue my other half decided to call an end to our 20 year relationship. We never married in that time, due to her personal thoughts on it but have been living together in all this time and have a 14 year old daughter with some additional needs. We build a house around 15years ago and we built it on the large side and in a way that eventually down the road we would go into the accommodation business of a small guesthouse/B&B. It's a joint mortgage with about 200k left and current value on the home would be 650k approx.

I work full time and usually from home so moving out was never a viable option due to limited places to live and the fact I want to be in or close to home to help with my daughter as needs be. I took the option to convert our block build garage to a living space (about 30m2) which I living in and finishing as I can. Boundaries at the moment are a bit up in the air with access in and out of the house a bit ah-hoc at the moment so I guess this will have to be formalised at some stage. We are seeing a counselor not to fix the relationship which we both acknowledge is not gonna happen but to help with the separation part.

In terms of the finances' I am paying the mortgage still 100% and giving half towards shared bills like utilities/broadband etc . I dont give money for household expenses and I get my own food etc. The house has been run as a business of a guesthouse for the last 4 years and my ex-partner is a sole trader with the business under her name.

Long term I believe I will look to move out however she is still undecided on what she wants to do as the business is her income and I see none of the profit. I want to fully provide for my daughter but I also want to protect myself in terms of getting funds together for a new home down the road. Complications have come up recently in terms of where the business and household converge like one example we had to get a new hot water cylinder and pumps installed, the bill was around 4k and I am expected to pay 50% however she will no doubt claim about 75% of that work against her tax bill as an expense.

I am wondering to I need to go down the road of a separation agreement which could unpick the financial side of things or does it need a Solicitor. Any advice appreciated.

Dial Hard

Counselling to help separate is a waste of money, you'd be far better served spending that money on a solicitor. I'd normally advise mediation for any amicable(ish) separation but the way your assets are joined at the moment I think a solicitor is most definitely required.

Dumb Juan

Hi,

You situation is complicate but not impossible.

I think keep going to counselling as it will hopefully help with emotions, fighting and separation.

Regarding assets and finance you need professional help. Do you have any idea of her income? Do you have access to her accounts? You say you are not married, so is safe to say you are both separately assessed for tax? I definitely think you need a solicitor to help you.

You should do a statement of means. www.solo.ie is a good website for information. Somewhere on the website is a link to maintenance calculator, which is worth a look at.

But I think you need to see a solicitor straight away.

Dumb Juan

Weekly Expenditure Blank.xls

A maintenace calculator

randomaccount1

Thanks all for the advice above, I have been leaning towards getting a solicitor on board so will look to do that as a matter or urgency. As far as access to business accounts, not now as she has taken my access away from the booking engines - however I would know approx how much /month the business brings in -> 10-12k ish before expenses.

We are both accessed separately for tax with my wages in my own account and a joint account for bills. Due to the fact I am on site as well I am also called upon to help now and again with maintenance tasks and guest interaction when she isnt about which is another issue that needs to be sorted.

Dial Hard

You need a solicitor and an accountant, imo.