Fantasizing more and more on have sex with men...

Areton

I'm from a Latin American country in the Caribbean. Up until now I've been straight  but my fantasies with men are escalating.  They, especially with black/dark skinned males, but in general with big strong males, some of them are people that I met in my youth. 

The first One, T was a black man that I met in my first years in college. He was a rather strange guy that had a gorgeous slender but muscular body. Now i remember that i was hypnotized by his hairy chest, in his speedo he was magnificent. He was  25, and I was 18 and now I think that it would be so nice if he would make a move in those times.. maybe it would change my life. I always fantasize on T seducing me or even taking me to his home and forcing me and making me his.

The second was L. He was a great friend and a gorgeous man. Not black but dark skinned and athletic. The thing with him is that he actually kind of made moves on me, constantly insinuating things and making sexual jokes about us...he even give me a little drunk kiss one day but he was drunk and i feel uncomfortable. But I actually had fantasies of him, laying over my back and making love to me in an intense tender way. In that time I had a lot of resistance to those desires and also desired other things. If he -or me- would make a "proper move", i mean, talking to me directly or approaching me in a moment more opportune...what would happen??. Now I kind of fantasize about a parallel reality in which he seduced me and we became lovers and lived together. Sometimes, in those fantasies, he would share me with his friends.

The third, R, was also a beautiful black man. He was big and masculine, a little fat with a magnificent chest. We were great friends.  He talked a lot about his big penis -part serious, part in jest-and i think that he may have made some insinuations to me. With him I also have fantasies of being seduced, and possessed.

I'm fascinated with the physique of black men but actually have an experience with a friend in which i made a fellatio to him. He was a slender white guy and it only happened once but it was nice. He now lives in another country but I would like to see him.  Im also strongly attracted with women, and i'm a man of about six feet, and usually are very active and dominating in sex, but is as, in this fantasies, i wanted to switch polarities and just be "possessed" or taken. I'm having elaborated fantasies of being young and seduced -even forced- by older stronger males.Maybe this is common. I don't know.

Actually I don't have those fantasies all the time, and also they work very well for me as fantasies but sometimes i wonder if i should try to act out them. I'm 46 and don't know if it's too late to pursue an experience or relationship of this kind. Most of time i don't think in it but, in some point, the desire to experience what is have a man, a strong man, making love to me, and being submissive comes back to me, i think getting more and more comfortable with the idea of have a lover or even a boyfriend and be the bottom. But I don't know if I will ever act on that desire or if it is a good idea to do it.

For now I just wanted to share it.

Liberty_Bear

What you are experiencing is a very common experience among men and has been written a lot especially now as more and more men appear to be at ease with their sexual orientation. Before making any move maybe speak to the Gay Switchboard (01) 872 1055