Frustrated with myself

Ll213

Hi all first post on here and somewhat of a common problem.

I'm attracted to a female co worker (I'm a male). We both work in retail but we're not co workers in the sense that we don't work directly together everyday, she works in a different dept to me and with retail shifts there can be some weeks where our shifts will interwind for as little as 6 hours total.

I've wanted to ask her out for the past couple of months but I keep wimping out and I'm left feeling very frustrated with myself when it happens. I know that I just need to summon up 2-3 minutes of courage and ask her and regardless of her answer at least than I would know where I stand.

I don't understand why I'm finding it so hard to do this as I'd generally be quite confident about myself and also I know how happy I'd be if I just asked her.

Hopefully by creating this thread I might create some impetus for myself by having to provide an update to anyone who replies.

JoChervil

Have you got any interaction with her? How does she respond to you?

If you surprise her with such an offer out of the blue, it's very likely she will say no out of this surprise. So I would proceed slower, observe her reaction on you and let her know in other ways that you might be interested.

rolling boh

Have you any opportunity to talk to her firstly without asking her out so you might get an idea what she is like and is she single . Straight up asking her out without really knowing her might be a bit heavy but I suppose plenty will disagree and say go for it .

Ll213

Hi guys I'm just going to respond in a single message to both since both posts are kinda similar. I have had some interactions with her and I think there is something there which I feel is worth acting on but it's not a sure fire read although I guess there never really is.

nj27

The more you think about it the more you ain't doing it. Paralysis by analysis, and further additional slogans etc. It's just a broad you're into, ask her out and stop making it the be all and end all. Also how about she's lucky you're asking her, why not think of it that way?

Neyite

Just ask.

Honestly, if she's not interested, or is already in a relationship, as long as you take a no from her gracefully, there won't be any harm done whatsoever, and it will only be as awkward as you want it to be. I've been asked out a lot in my younger days and it was a nice little ego boost to have been asked The only time it didn't feel nice was when the guy got thick with me after I politely declined. If you do get a knock back, a smile and a cheeky "ah well, no worries, it was worth a try" is a nice way to close it off with no harm done.

FWIW, a big proportion of couples meet through work, it's where you spend a massive chunk of your life when you think about it. I'm 18 years with my former workmate and so far so good.

thefallingman

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118446611#Comment_118446611

maybe don't jump straight into a date, how about a coffee at lunch break ? if that go's well a beer after work