Protocol for funerals at the moment

I haven't actually been to a funeral since before COVID but there's one this week I'd really like to go to. What's the protocol now at the funeral home, the evening before the burial? How is social distancing managed? How do you avoid shaking hands with the next of kin, or is that being ignored? Gloves? I don't want to be shaking hands with people and I guess they dont want to either, but what if everyone is doing it? It's such an emotional occasion, I'd rather not go at all than offend people by stepping back from hugs.

looksee

Greet people, carry something to occupy your hands and just give a little nod - not the traditional way, true, but you can maintain your distance without making a fuss about it or getting into hugs. There are sure to be people shaking hands, that doesn't mean you have to.

Its up to you, most people are understanding and reasonable, and many will feel the same as you. There will always be the odd one that will criticise you for not shaking hands, or criticise you for going against covid practise and shaking hands or hugging, so you can't win there.

I don't know what the situation is in the funeral home but the undertakers will surely be organising safe practise. Its hard to be definite, places vary. If you feel uncomfortable then just don't stay, go to the church/burial where there will be better opportunity to keep your distance.

Jellybaby_1

My friends, family and I don't shake hands or hug anymore. The most I've done is nod, a little hand wave or if pushed, I just bumped elbows if it was offered. If someone goes to shake your hand, I'd just say, "we'd better not", but keep it light with a little wave and try to make your masked smile reach your eyes! I've noticed that with friends too. At my age, and with my health, I don't really care if someone is insulted by me keeping to restrictions.

Thanks for the comments.... I chickened out and didn't attend the funeral home but will go to the cemetery tomorrow. I never feel at my ease in funeral home situations at the best of times! Nor am I a hugger normally either.

In some ways COVID has allowed me to be the slightly unsociable person that I always felt.

looksee

I know what you mean inthehat, I only in recent years learned to automatically do the hugging and air-kissing thing, then I had to learn to stop again 😀

Garlinge

I have to attend a funeral in UK tomorrow. All will wear masks in chapel and people are being asked to do antigen tests on the day. Otherwise there seems a great relaxation of rules so no limit on attendees in chapel and for the 'afters'.

looksee

That is the UK, from what I have heard from relatives there the level of restrictions, even at its peak, was no-where near as aware and observed as here.

Garlinge

And daughter living in London got covid in March 2020 and then was early to get both jabs but now living in Ireland and caught covid here so immunity of earlier dose and jabs worn off?

looksee

Goodness that was unfortunate, really bad luck to have two doses and in spite of vaccination.

Garlinge

First covid was before vaccine available... classic loss of taste/smell and again this week but not a bad dose. Her London flatmate got 'covid toes' and back then little was known of symptoms. Now she would be getting booster earlier if lived in UK .... not sure how she fits into Irish system. They say a dose of covid is as good as a vaccine....

It’s hard to know what to do with the handshake if you are talking to the bereaved. Maybe if expected use a hand steriliser before and after.

looksee

Maybe wear gloves? I know its sometimes considered a bit rude to shake hands with gloves on but at the moment would probably be appreciated.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/118129734#Comment_118129734

Not sure if that solves the issue because the gloves themselves can carry the virus. It’s putting your hands close to the nose or mouth that infects.