Agreeing with a remark made at someone else's expense?

Brid Hegarty

You know that moment when the only time your a** hole boss is actually being nice is when he's making a nasty joke about someone else; and you laugh or agree with it?? Be honest, did something equivalent of this ever happen to you? 

I'm only now just about able within myself to not agree with such a person when something like this happens. It's quite a bit harder than what you think when it actually happens... to be able to not agree and instead leave an awkward silence. In such a moment you can be fooled into thinking that your boss wouldn't say something 10 times worse about you to the very same person he's mocking.

I actually happened to remember a scene on TV recently which reminded me of this. For those of you who are familiar with 'Mad Men', it was when Don Draper found Roger's diary and started laughing at what he saw written to Peggy. But Peggy did not join in, and instead corrected him.

Of course it's not always going to be a boss who does this. But it's amazing the amount of people who are only too happy to sacrifice what they believe in and join in mocking another person, so that they can be down with the cool fella.

I'm Eating my breakfast, Brid.

degsie

No, because I'm a grown-up

growleaves

'The absent are always wrong' - French saying

Fly_away

Your choice of response isn't binary. You don't have to show agreement OR remain silent.

You can take the personal aspect out of it and comment on the general behaviour that he/she is complaining about and try to link it away from the person they want to bitch about.

This is a polite and constructive way of telling someone you're not going to engage in **** taking behind someone's back.

Brid Hegarty

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117689648#Comment_117689648

That's true.

Gary Scrod

Try something like 'You are both chunts'. That should shut him up.