A gal and her boyfriend tried to mug me off this evening

Emphasis on "tried to".

She was a dime.

Hey boyfriend fell out of the genetic-mutation tree and hit every branch on the way down.

For some reason I seem to consistently attract negative attention from that type (especially on the Luas between Tallaght and St James's).

I was riffling through my latest set of downloads on my music player (the new Simon Patterson BTW, "Beyond" - better than sex), when I hear this sound behind me which I initially thought was a cat hissing.

I didn't bother to turn around but felt this gaze on me whilst they walked by, come to see this blonde dime piece to my right, and this horrid looking Joe Viteralli looking stunt double beside her.

He turns about, stares right at me as if to say, "this here? this is my territory".

He continues to stare right at me clearly being confrontational so I eventually just kind of give them a good dose of derisory laughter, and they both sheepishly mince off.

Is it just me or should a gal like that not be some junior Doctors trophy girlfriend?

Why do they insist on hooking up with social welfare beneficiaries?

Do they not have greater aspirations than cashing state funded child support cheques for the foreseeable future?

And given that my very existence seems to cause deathly insult to their type, will there come a point in the near future that I will need to discontinue commuting via the Luas entirely?

PS - for the uninitiated, "mug me off" =

https://youtu.be/dPtqfAMyGq8?t=25

Oranage2

Okay

Passenger

You shoulda went all Paul Vitti on his ass.

TefalBrain

You must have a rubbish sex life OP

mikemac2

Simon Patterson?

Joe Viteralli?

I used to be with it but now I must be old :(

No idea whom these are. Someone call the retirement home for me

Avon8

Wait until she opens her mouth and the accent will have your balls contracting upwards quicker than a winter dip in the sea.

No junior doctor could be bringing that home to Nigel and Miriam, no matter how much of a lasher she looks when she has the face on

spakman

Did you drop into the local speakeasy to tell them about the dime of a gal you saw?

McGinniesta

I don't know what a "dime" or a "dime piece" are.

Mountjoy Mugger

How da f... did I find myself here. ?

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684455#Comment_117684455

Pfffff,

https://youtu.be/Q-QASuJcGyE?t=343

You tell me (time stamped right at the drop, "climax", if you will).

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

what age are you OP? serious question

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684492#Comment_117684492

Old enough......... to party.....?

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684498#Comment_117684498

I'll take that as early twenties. I assume skanger couple were same age as well. The women can be very nice around that age but give it a few years for the genetics to kick in and they're dog rough.

Useless, flake millenials.

OP, you need to act like this man

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HcSo2pqWOaQ

whisky_galore

Does this new type of mugging involve just staring?

They sound like rubbish muggers OP.

whisky_galore

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684476#Comment_117684476

Is it 1920s Prohibition Era slang?

Tell me how

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684538#Comment_117684538

Actually CCTV footage of the OP in the incident here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAhEFuq62-I&ab_channel=irish332

Yurt2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDd7IaajjR8

What a story John Joe

McGinniesta

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684559#Comment_117684559

God only knows.

storker

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684430#Comment_117684430

This didn't actually explain anything.

nj27

A guy tried to mug me in Paris. I just turned a bit and walked past him. It worked too. I think the point is that people who try to mug others aren't the master criminals that some people imagine them to be.

Wibbs

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684965#Comment_117684965

The OP is, well let's just say... special. Fantasist oddball works too.

riclad

Whats a dime? Mug me off? Is that frighten me. Is this cockney slang? It's funny sometimes there's pretty girls , they look like models until the speak and the whole effect is ruined, I don't watch love Island, im not up with the latest slang

riclad

I googled it a dime is a 10 very attractive woman

riclad

A guy tried to mug me once I was on a bike I just cycled away.

The J Stands for Jay

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684498#Comment_117684498

13

2ndcoming

Sweet baby Jesus.

LillySV

SERIOUS **** MUSIC QUOTED

con747

Op, you need a good mugging so you know what a mugging looks like. 🙄

Canis Lupus

Someone sounds a bit resentful towards women....

BOHSBOHS

Were they takin fackin liber eees OP?

joeguevara

Fair play, you would have got a solid B for that in the creative writing section in English Junior cert honours. Room for improvement but getting there.

PalLimerick

OP sounds like a jealous nerd that can't pull a bit of "a sort".

blade1

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684488#Comment_117684488

He's no Frank Patterson!

tabby aspreme

OP, some day, you might be able to replace the word Mug for Tug, imagine that.

Quantum Erasure

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684430#Comment_117684430

funny how?

Hangdogroad

Translation: a pair of junkies stared at me.

Quantum Erasure

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117685577#Comment_117685577

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISy0Hl0SBfg

bonkers

Duckworth_Luas

Imagine being so odd looking that the junkies stare at you and think "look at that poor gobshite"!

Scotty #

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117685564#Comment_117685564

No such thing as a 10.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZhVSfIf-Kng

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684506#Comment_117684506

Actually I'm gonna be a stickler here:

It's not "genetics" that kick in.

It's downstream gene expression, aka "phenotyping", how the genes express themselves through the prism of development.

Aka neurodevelopment.

This is a function of acquired thought process which is heavily influenced by I guess, that which influences thought process (quell surprise), culture, values, both familial and societal etc.

That is to say, it's not like that potential trophy gal was/is predisposed to being a skank.

That will be a function of societal influence and resultant acquired cognitive state, which in this case is no doubt influence by "Anto" and his glamorization of teh "bad boy" lifestyle.

What I'm saying is if she ditched that mob and decided to lend some motivation to the Junior Dr's and upcoming talent that makes the genuine cogs of society turn (and pays the welfare cheques for Anto + friends), that entire phenotypic "skank" outcome could be in part or largely precluded/avoided.

YellowLead

You’re not on Love Island I’m afraid OP - though I admire your wishful transforming of a skangery Luas experience in overcast Ireland into such in your head - way to escape :)

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117684466#Comment_117684466

You know what?

Maybe ya'll were onto something here.

Given the week that's in it (20+ degrees in ireland, shock/horror), I took a few days off so this morning, said I'd start getting my tan on.

I don't like to go right out in the sun so a few minutes in the sunbeds works wonders for getting that base color.

All was fine, chill etc., except on my way out after a quick bake, I notice this cracker wearing them tight lycra pants.... yoga pants I believe their known as.

All the usual accompaniments, straightened hair, perfect makeup, hot figure etc., but.... she was on her phone at the time kind of "giving it large", you know the full hand waving motion like she's conducting international class business with the prime minister - then she clocked me.

She was about early 20's, and went from giving-it-large, to fucking "super-size-me".

That accent.......

I shouldn't necessarily judge, but how some chicks think that "skanger" thing is hot, it defeats all rationale and common sense.

My reflexive response was to quicken my pace and avert my eyes..... Jebus I must sound like a uppity motherf**ker but it's not that I'm condemning certain social groups, it's just simply that I'm attracted to hotness, and that.... that's the anti-hot, the ultimate passion killer.

Shame.