People ignoring non-native Eng speakers when there's a native speaker present

PoisonIvyBelle · 24-03-2021 04:52PM #1

This is something I've noticed a few times over the years and especially in my current relationship with a non-native speaker. His English is really quite good but with a distinct accent, and once someone hears the accent or see him pause to work out what they've said, they often direct the conversation to me and ignore him even if he started convo/Q.

The best example I'd have is in retail, if we're in a store and he asks a Q they notice the accent and look at me instead to answer. Or, if he doesn't understand exactly what they've said, they look to me and talk to me instead of just repeating it to him a little slower. I know it doesn't sound like a massive deal but I find it quite rude when he's standing there right beside me. He's so used to it that he doesn't even comment on it but should he have to be used to it?

It's especially become even more apparent to me since starting to learn his language, because I know I'd be embarrassed if a similar situation happened to me in his country any time I tried to speak in their language.

I'm wondering if this is something non-native speakers here commonly experience?