Really bad work stress

Adviseme

I’d like to hear your guys advice.

Last week I started a job as let of my college degree. It is supposed to last until June but it is causing me so much stress.

I’ve never really had issues like this with a job but I feel like there is so much expected of me and there’s so much to learn and my quality of life has dropped massively. I can’t sleep at night because I’m worried about work, I can feel my heart racing all day and even as I type this my hands are sweating.

It’s so embarrassing because there are people my age who have done this job and had no issue and here I am on the verge of tears because I can’t handle it.

I’ve worked many summer etc jobs etc and never been like this. My employer isn’t even particularly bad, I really think it’s me that’s the problem. Maybe I’m just not suited to this work but there’s no way I can do this for 6 months my mental health will go to hell.

I’m afraid that my college won’t let me leave this job though, even though up until 2 weeks ago I was due to do classes as normal as I hadn’t secured a job. I’d love to be able to go back to that.

I’m sorry if I’m rambling on, there’s probably other things I want to say that I can’t think of but I’ll keep it short.

drunkmonkey

Are you on your own, work is a strange place at the moment especially starting off.
Have you anyone in work to chat to and help find your feet.
Get some sleep, switch off devices, maybe a 30 minute walk in the morning before work to soothe the mind.

jackboy

Adviseme wrote: »

I’d like to hear your guys advice.

Last week I started a job as let of my college degree. It is supposed to last until June but it is causing me so much stress.

I’ve never really had issues like this with a job but I feel like there is so much expected of me and there’s so much to learn and my quality of life has dropped massively. I can’t sleep at night because I’m worried about work, I can feel my heart racing all day and even as I type this my hands are sweating.

It’s so embarrassing because there are people my age who have done this job and had no issue and here I am on the verge of tears because I can’t handle it.

I’ve worked many summer etc jobs etc and never been like this. My employer isn’t even particularly bad, I really think it’s me that’s the problem. Maybe I’m just not suited to this work but there’s no way I can do this for 6 months my mental health will go to hell.

I’m afraid that my college won’t let me leave this job though, even though up until 2 weeks ago I was due to do classes as normal as I hadn’t secured a job. I’d love to be able to go back to that.

I’m sorry if I’m rambling on, there’s probably other things I want to say that I can’t think of but I’ll keep it short.

Your only there a week. It’s going to stressful for a while as it is new and you are in the steep learning phase. I guarantee that in a few weeks time things will be much better and by the end of the six months you may be flying it.

Don’t give up. Just try to manage the stress until it eases. Excercise and eat healthy will help but beyond that just stick it out.

dreamers75

I dont think this is a work problem but more a panic attack/anxiety issue which you need to look into.

Panic/anxiety are perfectly normal no matter what the situation is.

OMM 0000

Can you tell us what the work is?

Shiny

You are starting out fresh and aren't expected to know everything from day one.

Don't be afraid to ask for help as someone on your team with more experience could help you fix an issue very quickly and save you hours/days of fretting.

Be curious, enthusiastic and ask questions. Your knowledge and confidence will increase over time and you will settle in.

Leftyflip

It sounds like you might be putting a lot of pressure in yourself. It's a new job, nobody expects you to know everything at the start. Just because there's people there who can do it without problems, doesn't mean you have to compare yourself to that. Take a step back, breathe and take it easy. Use any support work can give you and ask your questions.

I changed careers to a commissioning job nearly two years ago and I was freaking out as I'd only gotten a weeks training (off a first year apprentice of all people) and I didn't feel ready at all, but it passed.

Don't dwell on the simple things and do your best. You're learning, mistakes are allowed and so is taking a bit longer to do things.

The White Wolf

I did a placement after college OP and it was really rough at first, by far the worst working experience I had at that point (like you had plenty of jobs before). The sector was dealing with mental health and addiction in people so some sectors can be much rougher starting off than others so whatever job you're doing, struggling is in no way a reflection on you.

It's natural to put pressure on yourself on what feels like possibly your first "important" job so you just need to link in with your colleagues as much as you can to learn the ropes. People expect new starters to ask lots of questions and to need regular help so don't be afraid to ask (especially during a pandemic).

Hopefully the supports are there for you to use OP, if you there are things will get better I guarantee it.

OP you said you've worked in jobs before - were they similar skilled professional roles?

With college placements, you really should be getting instructions about what to do, rather than having to make decisions yourself. Decision-making can leave you feeling responsible for things. Responsibility outside your capability will leave you stressed out.

Your employer is going to want to utilise you as much as they can, and if you're stepping up and taking on whatever's given to you, and getting through it, that can act as an indication to them that they can keep giving you more. The better you do, the more they trust you, but the more they trust you, the more you might feel responsible for living up to that trust.

If you're struggling, it's important to indicate that to management. Start by:
- Making sure that when someone gives you instructions that aren't clear, or that leaves decisions up to you, that you ask them what THEY want you to do about X, Y, Z. Don't take on responsibility for sorting out the unknowns.
- If you're not sure about something, or you've asked a question and the instruction isn't clear - say you don't understand. Make them explain it over again and if that still doesn't make sense, tell them.
- If you've taken a task that made sense at the time, but now you're worried about it, go to the person who gave you that task and say you're worried about it. They should take that off you.
- Push back. When something feels like your responsibility, it shouldn't. Unless you're the best-paid college student ever, you're not getting paid enough for this stress. Make it clear to people that your problems are their problems.

If you start pushing back and saying you need more help, and you don't get it, something has gone wrong, either a bad/stressed manager or a bad/stressful workplace. Find someone you can escalate this to - perhaps the person who arranged the placement for you, HR, or team lead. If you don't have that person, at the very least confide in some of your colleagues and they might be able to help find a solution for you.

Mrs OBumble

true-or-false wrote: »

OP you said you've worked in jobs before - were they similar skilled professional roles?

With college placements, you really should be getting instructions about what to do, rather than having to make decisions yourself. Decision-making can leave you feeling responsible for things. Responsibility outside your capability will leave you stressed out.

Your employer is going to want to utilise you as much as they can, and if you're stepping up and taking on whatever's given to you, and getting through it, that can act as an indication to them that they can keep giving you more. The better you do, the more they trust you, but the more they trust you, the more you might feel responsible for living up to that trust.

If you're struggling, it's important to indicate that to management. Start by:
- Making sure that when someone gives you instructions that aren't clear, or that leaves decisions up to you, that you ask them what THEY want you to do about X, Y, Z. Don't take on responsibility for sorting out the unknowns.
- If you're not sure about something, or you've asked a question and the instruction isn't clear - say you don't understand. Make them explain it over again and if that still doesn't make sense, tell them.
- If you've taken a task that made sense at the time, but now you're worried about it, go to the person who gave you that task and say you're worried about it. They should take that off you.
- Push back. When something feels like your responsibility, it shouldn't. Unless you're the best-paid college student ever, you're not getting paid enough for this stress. Make it clear to people that your problems are their problems.

If you start pushing back and saying you need more help, and you don't get it, something has gone wrong, either a bad/stressed manager or a bad/stressful workplace. Find someone you can escalate this to - perhaps the person who arranged the placement for you, HR, or team lead. If you don't have that person, at the very least confide in some of your colleagues and they might be able to help find a solution for you.

This is all excellent advice - a college placement is not a real job, you should not be taking on responsibility.

That said, if if's so bad that you're in tears, there's possibly an issue with your stress reactions too - which wouldn't be that surprising, given the ****ty year we've had. Visit your GP to discuss: you need to know if it's feasible for you to work in this field long term.

Adviseme

true-or-false wrote: »

OP you said you've worked in jobs before - were they similar skilled professional roles?

With college placements, you really should be getting instructions about what to do, rather than having to make decisions yourself. Decision-making can leave you feeling responsible for things. Responsibility outside your capability will leave you stressed out.

Your employer is going to want to utilise you as much as they can, and if you're stepping up and taking on whatever's given to you, and getting through it, that can act as an indication to them that they can keep giving you more. The better you do, the more they trust you, but the more they trust you, the more you might feel responsible for living up to that trust.

If you're struggling, it's important to indicate that to management. Start by:
- Making sure that when someone gives you instructions that aren't clear, or that leaves decisions up to you, that you ask them what THEY want you to do about X, Y, Z. Don't take on responsibility for sorting out the unknowns.
- If you're not sure about something, or you've asked a question and the instruction isn't clear - say you don't understand. Make them explain it over again and if that still doesn't make sense, tell them.
- If you've taken a task that made sense at the time, but now you're worried about it, go to the person who gave you that task and say you're worried about it. They should take that off you.
- Push back. When something feels like your responsibility, it shouldn't. Unless you're the best-paid college student ever, you're not getting paid enough for this stress. Make it clear to people that your problems are their problems.

If you start pushing back and saying you need more help, and you don't get it, something has gone wrong, either a bad/stressed manager or a bad/stressful workplace. Find someone you can escalate this to - perhaps the person who arranged the placement for you, HR, or team lead. If you don't have that person, at the very least confide in some of your colleagues and they might be able to help find a solution for you.

Not related to this post but I’d like to thank everyone for taking the time to give me a few words of wisdom.

True or false, thanks for your advice. I’m really struggling in this job. It’s the first time I’ve worked in this sector but I’ve worked in other areas such as construction with no issues at all so I think I just might not be cut out for this job/sector in all honesty.

I’ve made contact with the college with my issues and was told to give it a few more weeks, but I’ve worked many jobs before and I just know this isn’t for me and I won’t last the 8 months. My fear is that if I leave it too long that I will have no choice but to defer a year and return to college next year.

My stomach is in knots with the thought of returning on Monday and I’ve had a headache for days, maybe deferring isn’t such a bad idea!

siblers

What exactly is causing the stress?

Is it too hard? Too high a work load? Demanding colleagues or clients?

NSAman

Sounds like the issue is with you and not the job. No offence.

Why are you stressed? It makes no difference. You are a new person in the company. What pressure can you honestly say is being put on you? I think you are the person putting pressure on yourself.

While I understand that the sector may not be for you, at least give it a chance.

Ask people in your team, ask the manager/owner/responsible for direction if you are floundering.

Don’t take it all so seriously, it’s a job at the end of the day. Nothing is worth it, but just calm down. Getting sweaty palms thinking about it, means that you are WAY over thinking it all.

Adviseme

siblers wrote: »

What exactly is causing the stress?

Is it too hard? Too high a work load? Demanding colleagues or clients?

Systems that are completely not user friendly, as the weeks go on the work load will be increasing and will be expected to juggle multiple tasks at the one time with each task having a certain time in the day to be completed for administrative purposes. Clients calling throughout the day which pulls you from the other tasks. It’s a small employer with other employees in just single digits including the owners.

It’s hard to explain it without writing a small novel, but hopefully I’ve explained it a bit there. I’ve never worked in this environment before and I’m completely out of my depth.

Adviseme

NSAman wrote: »

Sounds like the issue is with you and not the job. No offence.

Why are you stressed? It makes no difference. You are a new person in the company. What pressure can you honestly say is being put on you? I think you are the person putting pressure on yourself.

While I understand that the sector may not be for you, at least give it a chance.

Ask people in your team, ask the manager/owner/responsible for direction if you are floundering.

Don’t take it all so seriously, it’s a job at the end of the day. Nothing is worth it, but just calm down. Getting sweaty palms thinking about it, means that you are WAY over thinking it all.

To be honest I’d agree with you. I think it’s just me struggling rather than the employers piling on the pressure.
I’m just not able for this particular line of work. I suppose the issue is that I know it’s not for me, and I’ve had plenty of other jobs that I’m well able to do, but I feel trapped here because I’m unable to leave without causing issues with my college course.

NewMan1982

Adviseme wrote: »

To be honest I’d agree with you. I think it’s just me struggling rather than the employers piling on the pressure.
I’m just not able for this particular line of work. I suppose the issue is that I know it’s not for me, and I’ve had plenty of other jobs that I’m well able to do, but I feel trapped here because I’m unable to leave without causing issues with my college course.

Don’t throw in the towel just yet.
It could be a bad company or it could be you adjusting to a new type of job.
Maybe look into ways of dealing with stress and worry.
I’d say most new jobs would take people 6-12 months to become competent at.
Ask for advice and take notes in processes.
Plan your next day the evening before and keep a to-do list.
If you do eventually give up then it’s no shame. At least you gave it a shot.

kirving

What is the line of work?

Important to give an idea so people can help suggest things which have helped.

At some point, there will be things out of your control, like customers calling as you mention, which screw up your day.

In my line of work, I could have plans made for weeks to do certain things on a given day, and it all goes out the window because of a customer demand changing, or a machine breaking, or someone is out sick.

It might take a while, but one you realise that it's not your personal problem that the other work has slipped, but the company's problem, you'll sleep much easier. LL you can do it your best, and control what you can.

siblers

Adviseme wrote: »

Systems that are completely not user friendly, as the weeks go on the work load will be increasing and will be expected to juggle multiple tasks at the one time with each task having a certain time in the day to be completed for administrative purposes. Clients calling throughout the day which pulls you from the other tasks. It’s a small employer with other employees in just single digits including the owners.

It’s hard to explain it without writing a small novel, but hopefully I’ve explained it a bit there. I’ve never worked in this environment before and I’m completely out of my depth.

You should speak with your supervisor/manager to see if they can give some additional training or support. See if there is any training documents or manuals available to see if they can help.

jetfiremuck

Always remember you can always leave the job. Life stress can sap any level of enthuaism and life quality from you. I see people who are trying to do something that they are totally unsuited for and are miserable. Could you move to another job that will satisfy the college course requirements? There may be another place that you would really enjoy.

Good luck.

jetfiremuck

jetfiremuck wrote: »

Always remember you can always leave the job. Life stress can sap any level of enthuaism and life quality from you. I see people who are trying to do something that they are totally unsuited for and are miserable. Could you move to another job that will satisfy the college course requirements? There may be another place that you would really enjoy.

Good luck.

What if the challenges the op is experiencing are typical of the sector the op’s course is based in?

Work is not play, most of us have faced challenges and periods of doubt when commencing our careers, if you quit, it can get harder next time. I doubt any employer expects someone who is still studying/just qualified to perform to the standards of an experienced employee, but they do expect you to try, and to stick at it until you learn and become proficient.

NSAman

Adviseme wrote: »

Systems that are completely not user friendly, as the weeks go on the work load will be increasing and will be expected to juggle multiple tasks at the one time with each task having a certain time in the day to be completed for administrative purposes. Clients calling throughout the day which pulls you from the other tasks. It’s a small employer with other employees in just single digits including the owners.

It’s hard to explain it without writing a small novel, but hopefully I’ve explained it a bit there. I’ve never worked in this environment before and I’m completely out of my depth.

Ahhhh so the systems are not user friendly and you have to learn them before the pressure REALLY comes on?

I see an opportunity for you here. Simplify the processes, write them down. Discuss the issues with the owners. They too would love to see someone taking initiative in the process simplification.

Always stay positive. Forget putting pressure on yourself as this is not worth it for you, your colleagues and the owners. It is a small operation, people normally listen in small operations and are really happy when you show initiative.