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'Family flowers only please' - Why?

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  • 13-01-2021 3:21pm
    #1
    JimFin
    Registered Users Posts: 118 ✭✭


    Most funeral notices nowadays list "family flowers only please". Why is this? I can't understand why any family would have a problem with some well intentioned friend/neighbor etc. bringing flowers to a funeral, it makes no sense.

    My own theory is that most families don't in fact request this but it is put in by the undertaker to cut down on the amount of work they have moving them from home to church to graveyard etc.

    Any thoughts on why this now seems the norm??
    Post edited by Sephiroth_dude on


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    #2
    runawaybishop
    Registered Users Posts: 9,500 ✭✭✭runawaybishop


    Because they would prefer to have their own, organised, floral display and don't want people wasting money on random flowers that will be chucked.


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    #3
    Pamsteer
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭Pamsteer


    JimFin wrote: »
    Most funeral notices nowadays list "family flowers only please". Why is this? I can't understand why any family would have a problem with some well intentioned friend/neighbor etc. bringing flowers to a funeral, it makes no sense.

    My own theory is that most families don't in fact request this but it is put in by the undertaker to cut down on the amount of work they have moving them from home to church to graveyard etc.

    Any thoughts on why this now seems the norm??

    They often ask you to make a donation to a charity in lieu of giving flowers which is fair enough but no flowers and no alternative offered is a bit inconsiderate of those that want to show their sympathy.


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    #4
    Abel Ruiz
    Registered Users Posts: 887 ✭✭✭Abel Ruiz


    JimFin wrote: »
    Most funeral notices nowadays list "family flowers only please". Why is this?

    Are you for real?
    Sure this last year, only 10 people can go to a funeral.

    who gives a fluck about poxy flowers?


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    #5
    Abel Ruiz
    Registered Users Posts: 887 ✭✭✭Abel Ruiz


    Pamsteer wrote: »
    They often ask you to make a donation to a charity in lieu of giving flowers which is fair enough but no flowers and no alternative offered is a bit inconsiderate of those that want to show their sympathy.

    Its the family's wishes.
    Maybe you should be more considerate.
    At the moment, unless very close family member. All you can do is write a nice message on rip.ie


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    #6
    Pauliedragon
    Registered Users Posts: 2,469 ✭✭✭Pauliedragon


    JimFin wrote: »
    Most funeral notices nowadays list "family flowers only please". Why is this? I can't understand why any family would have a problem with some well intentioned friend/neighbor etc. bringing flowers to a funeral, it makes no sense.

    My own theory is that most families don't in fact request this but it is put in by the undertaker to cut down on the amount of work they have moving them from home to church to graveyard etc.

    Any thoughts on why this now seems the norm??
    I would imagine Covid has something to do with it.


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    #7
    seamus
    Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    The family chooses the message, so it's unlikely undertakers would be adding this to the message without the family approval.

    The reality is that nobody wants a big mound of random flowers, however well-meaning it is.

    A message and if you feel like a gift, a contribution to a charity is far more meaningful than flowers to most people these days.


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    #8
    HeidiHeidi
    Registered Users Posts: 28,818 ✭✭✭✭HeidiHeidi


    My parent died a couple of years ago, and we requested family flowers only. IMO it's a huge waste of money (and flowers) to have them piled deep at the funeral, and all will be dead within a week. We had three or four beautiful bouquets on the day, and asked that if people wished they donate to a charity related to the cause of death (that was nearly an afterthought though, just so people had an alternative if they wished).

    Definitely not covid related. More and more common these days (hence the thread i suspect!)


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    #9
    phormium
    Registered Users Posts: 3,295 ✭✭✭phormium


    I don't know the reason other than the massive waste of money they are! I know florists must make a living too but I'd much prefer people gave a donation to some charity than buy flowers that a week later look even sadder as they wither away on the grave.


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    #10
    The Tetrarch
    Registered Users Posts: 2,092 ✭✭✭The Tetrarch


    To avoid competitive flower giving.


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    #11
    Pamsteer
    Registered Users Posts: 29 ✭Pamsteer


    Abel Ruiz wrote: »
    Its the family's wishes.
    Maybe you should be more considerate.
    At the moment, unless very close family member. All you can do is write a nice message on rip.ie
    No need to get all bent out of shape! Just give people an alternative that's all I'm saying, it can be a donation, a book of condolences, a message on rip.ie etc.


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