Wrong time to fix things with ex-girlfriend?

LegacyUser

I was dating my ex-girlfriend for a year and it was honestly the best year of my life but in the last month of our relationship we got into some heated discussions. We were at a stalemate about a few issues and one night after a long chat I reluctantly suggested that we breakup. She was upset, as was I because I really care for her, but she agreed that it was the best thing to do, but I never thought that it would be the very end between us.

It all happened just before covid hit and I think that the time apart has really let me reflect on things and what’s important to me, as cheesy as it sounds. The issues seem so inconsequential now and I am confident we can work through them. I’m hoping she feels the same way, but I guess I’ll never know unless I ask her.

We went no contact after the breakup, but we started chatting again casually a couple of months ago. The topic of the breakup never came up. I didn’t think whatsapp was the appropriate forum for something like that.

I’m ready to try and fix things with her and work through our issues but I’m worried that now isn’t the right time. I’d love to meet and talk to her in person, but with covid it’s making it impossible. I’m a bit strict on the covid restrictions, maybe overly so and because she is in another county I can’t see her right now and maybe not even for another 6 months if restrictions stay like they are.

I feel like the longer I leave it the less of a chance I have to try and fix things or she finds someone else. I don’t know if she is dating anyone right now or if she is actively looking on Tinder or Bumble.

What should I do? Message her? Call her? Break the restrictions and meet in person? Wait the 6 months? I feel like this is the one chance to make it right and I don’t want to mess it up.

LegacyUser

Message her and ask to meet up in a few weeks...

You may think the issues that arose are inconsequential, you need to find out her thoughts. No reason Covid should stop you moving on this. Love is love. However, is this love..or boredom and no-one else is around? Either way... people just need to speak their truth. Get it out their and see how she feels, or die wondering. Nothing worse for the heart. If she's still in touch she still cares about you at the very least.

Xterminator

i would suggest you ask her to meet up outdoors for a walk and a chat. this is more responsible than breaking covid rules indoors.

if she says no, you have your answer. if she says yes, meet talk in person and see i she also agrees it is worth trying again. life is to short to be passive and wait 6 months.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice. I bit the bullet and asked her to meet. She said that we couldn't with covid but I didn't want this to drag out any longer and asked her how she felt about me. She said that she didn't want to start anything again right now because she had forced herself to move on, but then she said "who knows what the future holds".

To me that sounds like there's no chance of this working and it's time to move on. I'm as bit upset, but it's probably for the best. I can move on now knowing that I did all I could.

LilacNails

At least u bit the bullet and messaged her.... I had an ex get in contact saying similar to you, I did appreciate it but I moved on, I had to.... Just like she did and now u must.

Don't be hard on yourself, it's **** but so many people go through this too, that's just life unfortunately. Move forward.

alexpatt

Maybe you can stay in touch via text or calls. Of course, you have to accept that she moved on, but if she's really important in your life, building a friendship could be something you both should consider.