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11 year old unhappy and wetting the bed

  • 23-11-2020 1:14pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5


    My husband was diagnosed with PTSD and depression following a very traumatic event. He is not on meds but he is attending a counsellor. He is treating out 11 year old son badly on and off not physically but he is being quite hurtful to him when our son doesnt do what he is told. My husband tells him that he cant stand being in the same room as him calls him an idiot and leaves the room in a strop. If I am present I pull my husband up on his behaviour as I see it is really affecting our son. Now my husband says he wont discipline our child because I wont give him the back up. Last night it happened again when my husband left the room my son asked me why his dad hates him. This morning I my son told me he wet the bed. My husband doesn't treat any other of the children like this. Where do I go from here I want to support my husband in what he is going through but I wont let him treat our son this way. So where do I go from here?


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,348 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    This post is less about your son and more about your husband. Does he recognise that he is treating him differently to the rest of the kids? It is important that he sees why your son is a trigger for him and this can be done in counselling.

    To be honest, if there wasn't a pandemic, I would be recommending that your husband spend time staying elsewhere for a while. He is emotionally abusing an 11 year old child and until he can unpack why and stop doing it, I wouldn't really want him unsupervised around your son.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    I have to admit I agree.Your poor son, is this just happening out of the blue?How traumatic for your son too.If your husband keeps at this, your son will need help too to deal with this rejection for no apparent reason.

    This seems to be absolutely your husband's problem and one he needs to deal with through counselling fairly promptly, before he does damage that he cannot undo.

    I would suggest for yourself trying Barnardos maybe to start, I think they have an information line that might help.There is an organisation I have seen called Parentline too, literally a helpline for parents, they might be able to point you towards some good resources or give advice too.Suggest you contact them as soon as you have a chance.


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