Lied to gardai in statement

Admldj

Hi folks, so, to jump straight into it, my ex partner came to my house one afternoon while I was out with the children, she tried to get into the house and when that didn't work she smashed the windscreen on my work car and damaged the side gate.

When I got home, I called the guards and gave them cctv of her clearly doing it.

She was arrested yesterday and told the gaurds she paid me for the damages. This is completely untrue, I haven't had so much as an apology from her and in fact, took out a protection order on her within days.

I suppose my question is it can't be this easy to get out of a crime can it? Surely a judge will see she has no proof of this and dismiss it, my feeling is if she continues the lie into court she will perjure herself which is even worse for her.

What do you good people think?

Lenar3556

Admldj wrote: »

Hi folks, so, to jump straight into it, my ex partner came to my house one afternoon while I was out with the children, she tried to get into the house and when that didn't work she smashed the windscreen on my work car and damaged the side gate.

When I got home, I called the guards and gave them cctv of her clearly doing it.

She was arrested yesterday and told the gaurds she paid me for the damages. This is completely untrue, I haven't had so much as an apology from her and in fact, took out a protection order on her within days.

I suppose my question is it can't be this easy to get out of a crime can it? Surely a judge will see she has no proof of this and dismiss it, my feeling is if she continues the lie into court she will perjure herself which is even worse for her.

What do you good people think?

Sad situation, hope there can be some meeting of minds to help move on.

In answer to your question on the legal query, if the Garda decide to prosecute her, the charge is likely to be one of criminal damage. Whether or not she made a payment by way of compensation thereafter it not terribly relevant except perhaps in mitigation. Making a false claim to the effect that she made such a payment will quickly be seen as such and will damage her credibility.

coylemj

Admldj wrote: »

She was arrested yesterday and told the gaurds she paid me for the damages. This is completely untrue, I haven't had so much as an apology from her and in fact, took out a protection order on her within days.

If they went to the bother of arresting her, they're not going to drop the case simply because she says she paid you off. Which, as the previous poster has pointed out, won't get her off the hook on the criminal charge.

Admldj wrote: »

I suppose my question is it can't be this easy to get out of a crime can it?

The Gardai are not that dumb. She will be prosecuted, based on your CCTV footage.

eastie17

She probably wont get off, but you can be damn sure she'll get off a lot lightly than if the shoe was on the other foot.

Presuming you are a man that is of course.

Admldj

eastie17 wrote: »

She probably wont get off, but you can be damn sure she'll get off a lot lightly than if the shoe was on the other foot.

Presuming you are a man that is of course.

I am and I have no doubt this will be the case, the guards took over 2 months to actually arrest her, if it hadn't been for the constant calls and emails to the station I don't know if anything would ever have came of it!

ThewhiteJesus

Very unusual behaviour for a girl, rare even. In relation to court she can lie but it won’t do her any good, if she was an x is there no way to resolve it sounds awful bitter on both sides

JustAThought

ThewhiteJesus wrote: »

Very unusual behaviour for a girl, rare even. In relation to court she can lie but it won’t do her any good, if she was an x is there no way to resolve it sounds awful bitter on both sides

Victim blaming much.

banie01

ThewhiteJesus wrote: »

Very unusual behaviour for a girl, rare even. In relation to court she can lie but it won’t do her any good, if she was an x is there no way to resolve it sounds awful bitter on both sides

It's also funnily enough unusual behaviour for a man.
What's your actual point there?

That women are somehow less violent and should be afforded more leeway?

JustAThought

banie01 wrote: »

It's also funnily enough unusual behaviour for a man.
What's your actual point there?

That women are somehow less violent and should be afforded more leeway?

Luckily for you OP you have the cctv - its a miracle the police bothered at all - it might not get to court ( lost files/ other priorities/ guard sick on the day etc) . It mihht be worthwhile making a formal declaration/ statement to them being clear that she dis not pay a penny - otherwise they might drop it. Ask them to get a sworn statement from her as to when & how she said she paid it - if she says she dropped it to your house you will have her again on cctv - not doing it! I lived next door to violent unpredictable people for years and it was a nightmare - you always knew when things might kick off when there was a ‘special occasion’ or visitors or heavy drinking going on. It must be a total nightmare to have it within the family or arriving at your dor unpredictably.

Im not sure what the child minding / custody arrangement are but you could consoder having a barring order made against her in terms of your house. This may not be practical in terms of picking up/ dropping off kids but it also might help. You will get zero support from the gaurds if she sticks a knife at you or slashes your wheels - their salaries and pensions will still be paid - its you will be left paying for her lunacy and violence everytime. Nobody should have to endure this.

+ because you are a man you are worse off should you ever react even if you are afraid of her or what she might do. You can be sure if you ever hit her or react she will make every legal effort to use that to have the kids given to her and to paint you as a violent monster. You can also guarantee the courts would favour her.

Shame on the people victim blaming on this thread. If you were a female there would be people all over you like a rash manhating & offering emotional support. Some women out there are psychotic - there is not enough talk aboit it - and some of the worst violence on the streets from my cosy officeblock has been from women.It’s shocking.

You have my sympathies.
I’d also say you can choose to loosen or weive the terms of a barring order but without one as a man you have little back-up if things get worse. You should strongly consider it. I doubt she would hesitate.

There are also organisations that are funded to help people in your situations - they provide guidance and practical support on how to obtain barring orders, court support and appearances etc. They support victims of violence and families where there is a violent partner. Unfortunately although they offer support to both sides they are called things like Womens Aid. Go figure. Government funded. I have seen them at work and seen men win custody and house rights and the wiman barred from the family home so they do support men. They agonise over their name too. There is a great group in Bray who operated out of a private victim support room in the district court there. A call to Bray District Court might get you some contact details. They also offer emergency crisis protected / sheltered accommodation to both men or women with families in risk who have to leave suddenly becUse of violence or fear of their partner. But I guess as you have a home and your partner:wife is not in it this should not be needed as it is exactly that - a room shred with bunkbeds for your kids - a far cry from home.

01 6788858 is their office number. You are more likely to get a sophisticated male centered response from there than their helpline which is manned by mostly female volunteers. Although I coild be wrong in that. Their frontline staff are fantastic and do help men with barring orders, court appearances etc. Despite their name!

snickers

Just wondering is she just plain crazy or did you wrong her in some way things maybe a little raw for her if for instance you had cheated on her or something like that and the break up was recent to the events emotions may have gotten the better of her not excusing what she did but I have a kid with an ex and when we first split up f she went a bit crazy but after a few months things are much more amicable now remember she will always be the mother of your children and probably best for all party’s involved if there was anyway to iron out your differences good luck with it I don’t envy you.