Metrosexual Schoolboys

Hyperbollix

Had the afternoon free and decided I might get a quick trim at the barbers since it's a good 2 months or more since I've been. Bad idea.

There seemed to be what can only be described as a shambling zombie horde of already perfectly coiffed schoolboys making their way toward any and all available barbers. My usual place was a sea of wine jumpers and matching ties, so I hotfooted it over to another barbers, where two young lads were in the chair.

To my untrained eye, they looked like they were about finished because neither of them had much hair left apart from the 'teenager standard issue' mop on top which almost meets the eyebrows, the rest a No1 all around. Great, I think. I'll be in here in a moment or two.

15 minutes later and both of them are still in the chairs. To say the women cutting their hair were being meticulous would be an understatement. You wouldn't see a surgeon being more careful with a scalpel. I observed her with both hands on the clippers, nipping and chipping at this 14 year old's head like she was about to be judged in a hairdressing competition. I'd say in the time I was there, she relieved him of an egg cups full of gruaig.
There was another two of these kids waiting ahead of me, with obviously no hair growth to speak of since their previous visit, probably last Tuesday afternoon, so I went on my way with an audible huff which I'm sure was noted and many shíts were given about.

Ok, admittedly I'm an old hasbeen of 38 but what has the world come to when young lads A) appear to visit the salon more than their mothers and take longer than their mother's when in the chair. Have they withdrawal symptoms after the lockdown? Getting in as many as they can before they once again have to........let it grow a small bit! :eek:

It's a bloody disgrace Joe.

dxhound2005

There are two sorts of time, normal time and slow time which you get when you are waiting for something. Also shambling zombie horde is probably not the only way you could have described those fellow humans.

cj maxx

I see them . Getting fades or something, getting a commentary from their pals about what they should get etc. A long long way from what I was at that age !

cj maxx

cj maxx wrote: »

I see them . Getting fades or something, getting a commentary from their pals about what they should get etc. A long long way from what I was at that age !

I go when me hair look sh1te and there are these lads in the waiting areas with hair shorter than mine when I go out the door after my hair cut.

I wouldn't mind but they all get the same stupid half a hair cut. I mean if you are going 4 time as often as you need to the least you could do is get a full haircut.

Too much money, the feckers. In my day....

JasonStatham

Definitely a bollix.

Pauliedragon

Hyperbollix wrote: »

Had the afternoon free and decided I might get a quick trim at the barbers since it's a good 2 months or more since I've been. Bad idea.

There seemed to be what can only be described as a shambling zombie horde of already perfectly coiffed schoolboys making their way toward any and all available barbers. My usual place was a sea of wine jumpers and matching ties, so I hotfooted it over to another barbers, where two young lads were in the chair.

To my untrained eye, they looked like they were about finished because neither of them had much hair left apart from the 'teenager standard issue' mop on top which almost meets the eyebrows, the rest a No1 all around. Great, I think. I'll be in here in a moment or two.

15 minutes later and both of them are still in the chairs. To say the women cutting their hair were being meticulous would be an understatement. You wouldn't see a surgeon being more careful with a scalpel. I observed her with both hands on the clippers, nipping and chipping at this 14 year old's head like she was about to be judged in a hairdressing competition. I'd say in the time I was there, she relieved him of an egg cups full of gruaig.
There was another two of these kids waiting ahead of me, with obviously no hair growth to speak of since their previous visit, probably last Tuesday afternoon, so I went on my way with an audible huff which I'm sure was noted and many shíts were given about.

Ok, admittedly I'm an old hasbeen of 38 but what has the world come to when young lads A) appear to visit the salon more than their mothers and take longer than their mother's when in the chair. Have they withdrawal symptoms after the lockdown? Getting in as many as they can before they once again have to........let it grow a small bit! :eek:

It's a bloody disgrace Joe.

Social media. It's no coincidence we have a massive surge in steroids and teens waxing their arse and the rise of social media. 18 year olds walking around shirtless showing off the muscles in 10 degree weather. 1000% rise in steroids confiscated in the last few years by customs.

It's an outrage.. what's the story with them not wearing feckin socks too?..

_Godot_

Men and lads are allowed to look good too.

smellyoldboot

It's a sick world we have created. Everyone must strive to look perfect at all times, the caricature of the perfect life must be posted on Instagram/TikTok, one can be seen to look like a Ponce but never a povvo. These are the new rules and frankly, you can stick em up her hole.

Also went to the barber yesterday, Turkish lads around the corner. In and out in 15 mins and they did a grand job altogether

Sardonicat

_Godot_ wrote: »

Men and lads are allowed to look good too.

'Good' is a relative term.

Quantum Erasure

2 on the back and sides, 4 on top. In and out in less than 10 minutes, job done

Sardonicat

[Deleted User] wrote: »

It's an outrage.. what's the story with them not wearing feckin socks too?..

Cold ears and cold feet, are they made of tougher stuff than previous generations?

OP, if you were the same age you now you would either be doing exactly the same thing or growing your hair down to your arse as an anti-fashion statement. And do it has always been and ever shall be.

tastyt

Best thing that happened me in lockdown is buying an electric razor.

All that ****e in the barber pissed me off too, now I know il never go back

Blade 1 all round , 5 min job and your done. Looks better too as I was losing it a bit

Panthro

Going to a barbers on a Friday?
You're mental OP.

Monday evening is the only way.

Church on Tuesday

Deleted User wrote: »

It's an outrage.. what's the story with them not wearing feckin socks too?..

They are wearing no show socks.

utyh2ikcq9z76b

_Godot_ wrote: »

Men and lads are allowed to look good too.

Go way ye pansy

Sardonicat

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

They are wearing no show socks.

The point of which is to make it apoear they aren't wearing socks. What's wrong with socks, anyway? I remember when the greatest fashion faux pas a nab could make was to wear white socks. Are all socks shameful now? Give me a hairy bloke in boots, please.

Church on Tuesday

Sardonicat wrote: »

The point of which is to make it apoear they aren't wearing socks. What's wrong with socks, anyway? I remember when the greatest fashion faux pas a nab could make was to wear white socks. Are all socks shameful now? Give me a hairy bloke in boots, please.

It's because of the cuffed jean or trouser which creates a cleaner look. Not a fan of it myself but can understand why it's a thing.

odyssey06

I lost all respect for the OP when he walked out of the place leaving anyone left alive.

TheBlackPill

The fades thing is really annoying. Takes longer than a perm.

Sardonicat

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

It's because of the cuffed jean or trouser which creates a cleaner look. Not a fan of it myself but can understand why it's a thing.

Those cuffed trackies look like baby clothes.

Sardonicat

TheBlackPill wrote: »

The fades thing is really annoying. Takes longer than a perm.

Are you speaking from experience?

McGinniesta

We used to be able to batter these people when I was in school.

Now everyone is in touch with their feelings and sh1t.

Disgraceful.

Galwayguy35

I'd have thought the queue wouldn't be that bad these days in barbers, around here its appointment only.

TheBlackPill

Its all a reflection of increased vanity and narcissm in society and the more suggestable teens going with the flow. I would say any teen that gets his haircut quaterly and doesn't buy into any metrosexual behaviour probably very popular

McGinniesta

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

I'd have thought the queue wouldn't be that bad these days in barbers, around here its appointment only.

See. Blokes making an appointment for the hairdresser and buying make up and grooming products.

Get a crew cut.

Galwayguy35

McGinniesta wrote: »

See. Blokes making an appointment for the hairdresser and buying make up and grooming products.

Get a crew cut.

No its because they have to social distance.

Never go to a barber myself but a few people have told me thats the way its done since they re opened.

Annasopra

_Godot_ wrote: »

Men and lads are allowed to look good too.

They are. But lets face it this is really once again capitalism gone mad trying to make money off selling men the idea of what perfect male bodies are. The ensuing result will include eating disorders, mental health issues etc

auspicious

Pauliedragon wrote: »

Social media. It's no coincidence we have a massive surge in steroids and teens waxing their arse and the rise of social media. 18 year olds walking around shirtless showing off the muscles in 10 degree weather. 1000% rise in steroids confiscated in the last few years by customs.

To be fair 10 degree weather is fairly tepid, but I agree with everything else.
Social media, especially the likes of Instagram -best side out only muck- or tiktok where your pics and content can be viewed and critiqued/ criticised at any time create expectant levels of accepted esthetic standards which put huge pressure on their generation to conform or lose out. It's only going to get worse.
So get yourself a Philips series 5000 to avoid those queues .

Potential-Monke

My sisters son is 14 and autistic. He wanted to fit in so requested those skinny jeans. After a week he wasn't wearing them anymore. His mother asked why. His response: "They squash my balls. How does anyone with balls wear them?". My thoughts exactly!

I used to be a once every 3 months visitor to the barber, then started shaving my own head. Only went back in the last few years because beard. But now I'm not going again because I don't want someone who touches other peoples heads all day to be touching my face/beard.

The best we got as kids/teens was a bowla. And we had no choice in the matter.

Also, €15 to shave my head?! Feck right off.

One eyed Jack

Hyperbollix wrote: »

Had the afternoon free and decided I might get a quick trim at the barbers since it's a good 2 months or more since I've been. Bad idea.

...

Ok, admittedly I'm an old hasbeen of 38 but what has the world come to when young lads A) appear to visit the salon more than their mothers and take longer than their mother's when in the chair. Have they withdrawal symptoms after the lockdown? Getting in as many as they can before they once again have to........let it grow a small bit! :eek:

It's a bloody disgrace Joe.

Did you go to a barbers, or a salon?

Wouldn’t be unusual seeing metrosexuals in a salon alright, but wouldn’t find too many of ‘em in a barbers.

‘‘Twas explained to me by a barber once, a girl as it happens, that there’s a few differences between barbers and salons or stylists. I can’t remember any of ‘em but apparently salons are geared more towards styling and colouring, barbers are more geared towards cutting hair.

I made the mistake too of going to a stylists or a salon once, it was like she was almost afraid to cut my hair at all and was styling it all sorts of ways and asking me do I like it this way, that or the other... eventually I had to ask her could I just leave because it wasn’t what I wanted at all

Alejandro68

What is metrosexual? Makes me think of a train, which makes me think of activities done in the 70's/80's.

Strumms

I was waiting on a cut a week ago, the barber whose services I normally avail of wasn’t around, it was only one barber a quite young girl, and the apprentice doing the sweeping / cleaning and till work....

There was one kid about 18/19 getting a cut ahead of me and his little metro muppet friend who despite not in the process of getting a cut, was sitting in the adjacent barbers chair, giving very rude directions to the barber. She was polite but ignoring him or trying. Lad getting the cut thinks its hilarious, keeps turning his head mid cut to acknowledge / nod / laugh at his ‘mate’ or whatever the fûck it was to him... barber pleading with them but they just keep pissing around
... pre covid I’d go to a barber in the city and that shît started the perpetrator would be made pick a window...

Wouldn’t mind they both walked out looking girly as hmmmm.

Dank Janniels

Is that the "Meet me in Mcdonalds" look: short back and sides with Sideshow Bob on the front? The shtate of them!

Women have clothes, make-up, bags, shoes, jewelry etc. Men have hair, and they might only have it for a decade. Let them do what they want with it.

ILoveYourVibes

They are insecure.

That's all.

Its hard being a guy too you know.

StupidLikeAFox

You are 38. So 20 years ago, in 2000 (when you were 18) did you give a **** what people were doing in 1980? How would you have reacted if a 38 year old came to you in 2000 and said your haircut was crap and back in 1980 we all had long hair and your short hair is a joke? You are now that 38 year old

Time moves on, culture changes, what is and isn't cool changes. I don't understand how shocked you are that the young people of today aren't following the norms of 20 years ago. I hate to be the one to break it to you op, bit you are not cool

The Simpsons said it better than I ever could:

Kaybaykwah

How come cartoon characters only ever have 3 or four fingers?

Potential-Monke

Kaybaykwah wrote: »

How come cartoon characters only ever have 3 or four fingers?

Incoming blatant copy/paste

It turns out there’s not one concise answer, but a whole bunch of different factors that influenced the four-finger aesthetic. For one thing, it simply makes hands easier to draw. In the era of hand-drawn animation, having one less digit on every character in every cel could potentially save animators a ton of time, which, in turn, saved companies a ton of money. But there are other factors as well. A lot of early animation featured a rounded character design made up largely of circles (think Felix The Cat and Mickey Mouse). That didn’t leave a ton of room for rounded fingers on a rounded palm. As Walt Disney put it, “Using five fingers would have made Mickey’s hands look like a bunch of bananas.”

But there are even more factors at play too, like the fact that so many cartoon characters are animals, who we don’t necessarily associate with having five digits anyway. Plus four fingers strikes the perfect balance between a character looking alien, as they can with three fingers, and crossing over into the uncanny valley, as they can with five. The video also digs into the similarly complicated set of factors that influence why Japanese anime characters generally do feature hands with five fingers. That includes everything from superstition to Yakuza tradition. And ChannelFrederator explains how an ancient Japanese caste system still has a long-lasting impact on animation in Japan today, one that’s even caused Disney to pay retribution to lobbyist groups to avoid controversy over their four-fingered characters.

Omackeral

Sardonicat wrote: »

What's wrong with socks, anyway? I remember when the greatest fashion faux pas a nab could make was to wear white socks. Are all socks shameful now?

Only allowed to wear socks of colour now.

I'm jealous about how self-indulgent and vain their generation socially sanctions itself to be. When I was their age it was very much not ok to be considered to be concerned about your appearance, even though I'm sure most were as concerned about theirs in private as I was about mine. Meanwhile my brother would cut my hair every 2 months and so I'd spend half the year looking totally awful, but I knew nothing else and anything better would have felt unacceptably preening.

Their fashions are way more aesthetic than those of the 2000s. And note that the fashions haven't changed in like seven years - they have refined what looks best and aren't willing to alter it. There are also fewer of them overweight than when I was their age, and the average height is much taller - due no doubt in part to junk food no longer being the pleasurable novelty to them as it was to teenagers who had been children in the 90s and higher protein diets in families with fewer children competing for more meat.

Another thing I'm jealous of is how open they allow each other to be about mental health stuff - that was total no-go stuff in the 2000s - it would have been nice back then to have felt it was ok to share stuff I had in my mind and Im sure there were plenty like me. I imagine with WhatsApp etc the kids of that age are much less left out or socially out of the loop and parents are much more hands-on that they were even 15 years ago, which could only be good for their confidence i would imagine. They seem much better behaved than when I was their age, much fewer actual scumbags and I wish them well as they definitely have their own different challenges to contend with.

Oink

Sometimes I want to shout “can’t you see how fvckng ridiculous you look you idiot!?!”
And then I imagine someone taking out a picture of me from when I was 15. Loafers with no socks. Print shirts. That bandana... Even my mate felt he needed to have a quiet word with me.

That shuts me up.

Blitzkrieger

Boy could this be a long topic...

It's all relative. I was talking with a bull of a man one time about our dads, and he remarked how his dad would probably see him as "soft" if he were alive today. Next to that fella, I'd consider myself soft. I could (and probably will below) rattle off a few examples of behaviour that would have seemed outright homosexual when I was growing up, but attitudes and fashions change. I imagine there's a lot of pressure on young lads these days to be preening and primping, and as much as women can have problems with body image, I don't see it going a healthy direction.

On topic, I hate going to the barbers, and ****ers like that do annoy me. In and out with the minimum of chat should be the goal! I do try and put it off as much as possible, but I'd say 90% of the men I see at the barbers don't look like they need a haircut at all. It's not just the young fellas.

I suppose we should never shame someone for trying to look good. God help us - most of us Irish men need the help!

dxhound2005

Panthro wrote: »

Going to a barbers on a Friday?
You're mental OP.

Monday evening is the only way.

They're all closed on Mondays.

Hyperbollix

StupidLikeAFox wrote: »

I hate to be the one to break it to you op, bit you are not cool

I was never cool. And at 38, I certainly don't give a shít about being cool now! It's just a shock to see the institution that is the barber shop go from a short back and sides and a chat about the match to something akin to "a bit of me-time and pampering at a spa weekend"

Ain't no one got no time fo' dat, as a wise woman once said.

B.A._Baracus

Ah everyone was vain when young. If your hair is not perfect or if you're not wearing trendy clothes blah blah.

One of the bonuses of getting old I guess that you don't give a boll*cks about that any more.
It is probably worse today than previous generations with social media and internet.

It can be funny today tho as you can see guys who clearly spend an hour to get ready then acting all hard.

Church on Tuesday

Omackeral wrote: »

Only allowed to wear socks of colour now.

I love wearing different colored socks, Black is an overrated color.

micah537

Most towns have an old lad with more hair coming out their ears than they have on the top of their head and nostril hair long enough to be platted while going around giving off to young lads about their appearance. Not to mention the unibrow.





OP have you fully turned into one yet or just getting their?

Galwayguy35

Strumms wrote: »

I was waiting on a cut a week ago, the barber whose services I normally avail of wasn’t around, it was only one barber a quite young girl, and the apprentice doing the sweeping / cleaning and till work....

There was one kid about 18/19 getting a cut ahead of me and his little metro muppet friend who despite not in the process of getting a cut, was sitting in the adjacent barbers chair, giving very rude directions to the barber. She was polite but ignoring him or trying. Lad getting the cut thinks its hilarious, keeps turning his head mid cut to acknowledge / nod / laugh at his ‘mate’ or whatever the fûck it was to him... barber pleading with them but they just keep pissing around
... pre covid I’d go to a barber in the city and that shît started the perpetrator would be made pick a window...

Wouldn’t mind they both walked out looking girly as hmmmm.

Thats why I could never work as a barber or in retail, I'd have no patience dealing with cheeky little tossers like those two.