Partner and her ex’s

Jonmur1978

My partner is constantly creeping on her ex’s on Facebook, is that Normal ?
I discovered it by accident trying to find a webpage I had visited about fixing a Hoover.
Her last fella even called to the house when I wasn’t here to get her to dump me and go back to him and he was texting her the same.
I told her to put a stop to it but she admitted they are texting again.
Am I worrying about nothing ??

antix80

You should be worried. She's encouraging it. If she didnt want them texting her she could say so and if they persisted she could block them.

Tell her to make a decision. Them or you.

Augme

Get out. She sounds like an attention seeking head wrecker and she isn't going to change any time soon. If you stay with her you are just committing to a life of stress and worry.

leggo

The fact you even know all of this says a lot, the main thing it’s saying being “run away fast”. She’s not particularly trying to keep this a secret, she’s actively telling you these things. This isn’t someone who wants to give you a happy, secure relationship or someone who even cares about your feelings or happiness. You are but a prop to this person, a way to ward off boredom and try build up low self-esteem. If you left, they wouldn’t be sad you were gone, they’d feign sadness because it’s probably become a game to them to see just how much they can get you to put up with and if they can reel you back in when you go too far.

Don’t take it personally. This isn’t a reflection of you or your worth. This isn’t the best you can do or how you deserve to be treated, nobody deserves that. But it is worth asking why you’re putting up with this and why you’d settle for someone who’d have this little regard for you? That’s for the long term though. In the short term, run immediately and don’t look back. Even if it feels rash or crazy, I guarantee you it will not be something you look back on in time and regret.

cloudatlas

I'm sorry I have a different perspective on this. Everyone has a past. She's entitled to be friends with her ex's if she wants. I mean she obviously didn't go back to this guy when he asked her to because she is with you. I don't see the fact that you know about this as a red flag I see it as the hallmark of an honest relationship where she is open about her past relationships and ungoing acquaintance with these guys. We are connected to all kinds of people on social media and we are naturally very nosey as a species.

She isn't responsible for their feelings. In fact I think it's healthy for people to be friends with their ex's and it shows that things ended amicably and there was no bad blood. It shows maturity. Not everything needs to be catastrophised, she's with you not them, but she won't be with you for long if the petty jealously and this insecurity continues.

screamer

Sounds like a drama queen, life’s short and too short to have to second guess your partner, unless of course you’re into that drama ****e. Personally, I prefer the quiet life.

Godeatsboogers

RUUUUUUUUN

Hannibal_Smith

Mod Note

As the OP has closed their account, I'll close the thread there.

Thanks to all who offered help and advice.

HS