Could I be slow or something similar?

LegacyUser

Sorry for the unusual thread name.
Basically I am almost 30 now and I always feel a bit behind my peers. All through my school life I was always a bit slow at picking things up. I always there in the end. I didn't cause trouble and the teachers never caused me any hassle.
I managed to go to college but it simply didn't work out because I wasn't fast enough in work placements and essentially I failed college. After a few attempts I just dropped out.
The head of my department even said to me ''Your a lovely fella but your just a bit slow''(That stuck with me for years to be honest).
I'm currently working in sales after a long term of unemployment and I really like it. I sort of work at my own speed tough and I get on fine.
I can do things fast correctly at times but if I rush things I tend to make mistakes. I don't have that same briskness that some people have. I might be a tad fuss tough.
I had a speech impediment as a child and I'd have been assessed for things. I did see one report and it said I was average.
However if I mention anything like this to my mother she get's very cagey with me. I don't know is she lying or looks at me through rose tinted glasses.

I'm currently learning to drive and that's why issues are playing in my head again.(I know it takes time but I really doubt myself).

I know I'm not thick or stupid.

Basically is there anyway I can see was there any report done on me as a child by the HSE,(Probably was The Southern Health Board then) or get something done now?
Is this a common feeling?
Any advice would be very welcome in anyway.

I know this is a silly and trivially thing and the answer may not solve my problem.

Airyfairy12

That was a horrible thing for your head of department to say to you, what did you respond to her with that statement? No matter your talents or intellectual ability nobody ever has the right to speak to you that way or to condescend to you. Some personal development in assertiveness, self esteem and confidence would be a good option for you I think, look into some courses in these areas and consider getting counselling.

Regarding whether or not you're a 'bit slow', school has an awful way of making people feel stupid. I left school at 16 thinking I was thick, it took me another 16 years to realise that im not and im sure many young people leaving school feel the same, school values one type of intelligence. You can't judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree.

What course did you study in college? Might it have been something just not for you? I wonder if you studied something more inline with your own talents and interests? something like Retail management or communications maybe? Id also wonder how well you were applying yourself?

Its very difficult to get diagnosed as an adult but you could go to your doctor and ask about it, as for information regarding tests that were done on you as a child again you could ask your doctor about this, they might have a record.

Faith

I presume you can request access to your medical records, where there should be a record of the report written. That being said, things will have changed a lot in the time between the testing being done and now, and the report isn't likely to be very useful or applicable now.

You could get updated testing done privately, but this would be very expensive.

That being said, maybe it's more about working to your strengths and focusing on areas that don't rely on speed, rather than worrying about areas that are more difficult for you?

LegacyUser

Airyfairy12 wrote: »

That was a horrible thing for your head of department to say to you, what did you respond to her with that statement? No matter your talents or intellectual ability nobody ever has the right to speak to you that way or to condescend to you. Some personal development in assertiveness, self esteem and confidence would be a good option for you I think, look into some courses in these areas and consider getting counselling.

What course did you study in college? Might it have been something just not for you? I wonder if you studied something more inline with your own talents and interests? something like Retail management or communications maybe? Id also wonder how well you were applying yourself?

The comment the head of the department said to me really knocked me to be honest. I didn't really reply to it but I sort of felt the life going out of me.
I think those courses may be a good idea if anybody had any suggestions.
My results in the course were about average with the class. I could have done better in some areas but It's just generally working is my issue. I just can't keep up with the flow. I do sometimes find my mind sort of wonders even when I'm trying and this could also effect my attention to detail.

Faith wrote: »

That being said, maybe it's more about working to your strengths and focusing on areas that don't rely on speed, rather than worrying about areas that are more difficult for you?

Yes, I understand this.It just can be hard to pick these out for me. There just always seems to be somebody better. Being a nice and friendly person doesn't really help in life to be honest.

My siblings are also very bright 550 points plus, degrees, masters,etc great jobs. I'm happy for them however when you've family friends, relatives who basically say your thick or what happened to you. It's very off putting.

Sorry for ranting.

Rubberchikken

Look at the positives - you're in sales, not the easiest job. You're doing it well. You like it.

So what if you're working at your own pace. Everyone does in fact but it not fair to compare yourself to anyone else.

The department head was thoughtless and unkind to say such a thing to you and in time you'll realise it's not worth remembering.

hayoc

I dont do things quickly. I need to do things at a measured pace. Especially when Im picking them up for the first time.

I think thats normal for most people. It gets compounded by a bit of anxiety to be learning something new too. I know lots of people (including myself) who are slower when they start doing things but then as they relax and get used to it its grand.

The Head of the Department that said that to you was wrong. Plain and simple. I had a teacher tell me Id end up serving in McDonalds because I didnt apply myself enough. She was wrong too. Just because they were adults, doesnt make them right.

College doesnt work out for lots of people for a whole variety of reasons - most of them nothing to do with being smart.

In terms of "proof" - what are you looking for? An old HSE report done with the standards of the past and the ignorance that they had back then wont be much use to you now.

What you are experiencing is not trivial in any sense though because its bothering you. It sounds like you have self esteem issues or a sense that you are not good enough. Have you thought about therapy for this? I think it would help you a lot.

OP, you could be 'slow', sure

I'm very 'quick' myself. Unfortunately I have the attention span of a gnat and a memory no much better.

But I know myself and I work as best I can in different situations to play to my strengths and organise around my weaknesses.

Sounds like you already do the same to an extent. You have work, you know what you're at.

Rather than focus on a clumsy (at best) criticism/verdict from years ago, why don't you focus on yourself, looking at what you think you do well, what you could be better at, and keep working at it.

If there's someone in a supervisory position at work that you feel comfortable discussing such things with, maybe its an idea to invite feedback from them too.

Speed/raw brainpower covers a multitude of sins but most of the people I would have valued in a work context over the years had other characteristics like steadiness, attention to detail, good social awareness, reliability.

Takes all sorts.

TP_CM

You're probably not as slow as you think OP. In my experience, the 3 main things which make people slower to learn are:

Lack of confidence
Bad trainers (teachers who don't know how to teach)
Lack of interest.

I am only good at learning anything which is immediately and importantly required in my near future. If someone asks me to learn the football teams in the Premier league, I'm not so good. But if someone tells me a recipe, or a faster way of doing a task which annoys me, I take it on board with relative ease.

Our education system is flawed in the sense that too much emphasis is placed on the sciences and not on the arts, and the way we find out how "smart" we are, by taking exams, is not like anything in the real world. You might be highly creative, a fantastic chef, artist, or something which you just haven't explored yet.

I'd recommend trying out as many things as you possibly can, read as much as you can, and if there is anything in particular you'd like to be good at, repeat repeat and repeat it. Speed comes from repetition.

cannotlogin

The only way to find out is to seek professional help which is more difficult and expensive as an adult but is this really causing issues for you in a practical sense?

You have a good job in sales which you do well at. Sales isn't easy and doesn't come naturally to a lot of people. You have to be personable, credible, charismatic etc. If you are doing well in sales, I don't suspect you have any serious issues.

One experience, i.e. college, doesn't define you as a person, a lot of people struggle with college life, some may be due to something like dyslexia, or for others their strengths like in a different area.

I am academically quick, do well in exams with little effort etc but my practical skills are fairly poor. Anything creative is a struggle for me, anything with co-ordination is worse. It took me a lot of time to learn how to drive. If you judge me on how many times I sat my test, I could be considered slow but I'm not it's just something that didn't come naturally to me & my parallel parking is never going to be something I'm proud off. Some people can also buy & sell me with street smarts etc.

My point is we are all different. Your former head of department sounds like an idiot and is certainly slow in terms of emotional intelligence to say the least.

Perhaps, it's as simple as just it took you a long time to find what you are best suited to. It sounds like you have so put all your effort into what you are good at, it will yield better results than putting effort into things that you will never excel at.

If it's not causing you significant issues, let the past go, do what you love and are good at. No one should be made felt inferior simply because no one is, we all bring different things to the table.

Augme

If you have not heard of it, you should look up a SWOT and considered doing one on yourself and what you think of your abilities in a work/professional capacity.

Too often people focus on their negatives and don't focus on their positives or potentials. Everyone has things they aren't good at, the best people I have worked with are the ones who know their strengths and pkay to them and who also know their weaknesses and actively avoid situations that expose their weaknesses.

bitofabind

To echo others, if you’re doing well in a Sales environment then you’ve got skills far greater than many others. Sales takes a certain set of skills and 80% of people can’t sell and won’t survive in that world. (I say that as a Director who manages a team of reps). Could you start with analysing why you like the job and identifying how you’re playing to your strengths in the role and go from there?

Try to watch the narrative you’ve created here about your own capabilities. The education system is built for people who can do well in exams almost exclusively and bad teachers are everywhere. The most powerful and successful people I’ve met since leaving school are not, almost overwhelmingly, the A students. Try not to use these negative experiences to inform your self esteem and instead focus on what you’re good at in the here and now.

Bobtheman

Look up gardner's 7 types of intelligence. Also read anthony de mello awareness

Merkin

Your post is well written and you’ve made your point well so I don’t think you’re ‘slow’ at all (I hate the term incidentally).

I do think you should access your medical records though, particularly if your Mum was a little cagey.

Something like dyspraxia has only relatively recently been given the attention it deserves. I’m not saying you are dyspraxic but there may be a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why you struggle with some tasks and it would benefit you enormously both personally and professionally if you could find out why.

Wishing you the best of luck 🙂

I am me123

I can really identify with your post. I too, have been 'labelled' in a similar way in both part of my academic & working life. In my past jobs, I was the only one of the staff who had a 3rd level education and in that field it was pretty rare to have gone to college. It seemed this seemed to bother a lot of people I worked with..I dont know why. In their minds it was like 'Whats an idiot like them doing with a degree?' I, like you also do things a measured pace at work. Nothing to do with any form of impairment. It is just called being conscientious - actually taking the time to do a good job of a task as opposed to rushing through with a litany of mistakes to clear up after. Most times people only see what they want to see in a situation to justify not liking a person.
I feel, in hindsight, anyone who could ever openly label someone in such derogatory terms, without any real medical background/ proof or formal diagnosis is either ignorant ( in the sense they have no self- awareness that telling someone something like that is rude) or just plain jealousy at its worst.
Remember, its your opinion of yourself that should matter most. Who is so perfect in this life that they see fit to judge someone else?

Airyfairy12

I am me123 wrote: »

I can really identify with your post. I too, have been 'labelled' in a similar way in both part of my academic & working life. In my past jobs, I was the only one of the staff who had a 3rd level education and in that field it was pretty rare to have gone to college. It seemed this seemed to bother a lot of people I worked with..I dont know why. In their minds it was like 'Whats an idiot like them doing with a degree?' /QUOTE]

You'll often come across people that project their own insecurities at anyone with college level education, theyre the type to post memes and statuses on social media about how 'stupid people' go to college and having a degree doesnt make you intelligent which is true but I think people with a degree know this but For some reason it intimidates some people.
Imagine being the type of person to make someone else feel bad for achieving something because their achievement makes you feel insecure.

OP, I feel that confidence plays a big role, having low self esteem can make you look and act 'stupid' (I hate that word) when in fact youre not at all you just make mistakes because youre low in yourself.

I was learning to drive last year, I was so nervous that even after 3 months I couldnt even start the car properly.
Because of the nerves and lack of confidence in my abilities, no matter how hard I tried I could not learn how to drive. This came across as 'stupid' to other people, A parent and my first driving instructor, separately of each other knocked my confidence by telling me I was probably never going to be able to drive and i'll never drive a manual car.
I changed instructor and stopped practicing with that parent and after many months of practice and gaining confidence ive my test booked in a manual car.
If my first driving instructor could see me know lol. I know if I had continued taking lessons with her I probably would have gave up and left feeling 'stupid', incapable and not as good as other people.

You said youre good at working in retail so this must be an area where youre confident in your abilities. I wonder if a new manager started tomorrow and started criticizing you and your abilities in work what would happen? Ive no doubt you would start making mistakes, you'd work slower and you would have difficulty remembering to do tasks.
When youre low in confidence youre not able to fully concentrate on the job at hand because youre constantly worrying about not being good enough, even if youre not consciously aware of it.

If you go to a local counselling service they sometimes have information on personal development courses you can do but in the meantime, id recommend you buy the book 'CBT for Dummies' - That's not meant as an insult btw, it is literally my bible, I have a copy beside my bed and I read it every few weeks.

qwerty13

From my experience, there could be a few things at play:

Firstly, schools (and probably colleges) only measure a certain ‘conforming’ type of ‘intelligence’ - which generally relies on a lot of learning by rote. To me, an ability to do that isn’t necessarily a mark of intelligence. It’s a very useful skill - but just because someone can parrot something off doesn’t make them ‘intelligent’.

Secondly, communication: lots of people can have a great memory for stuff, or good powers of logic / reasoning/ figuring things out - but not convey that well. I think this takes confidence - and I’ve read enough on this forum to know that there are courses that can be done to help this (which got a few mentions in this thread).

Thirdly, play to your strengths! Which you do seem to be doing. I think anyone who claims or thinks that they’re good at everything is full of it. I won’t list my bad areas - but I know what they are, and that’s fine with me. I guess you could I’m lucky that I ended up in a job where my strengths marry with it - but it sounded to me as though you’ve done the same.

Fourthly, leave your past behind. The diagnosis that you may have got as a child is going to be so very out of date. And that professor, what a truly bad educator he was (and probably still is).

Could you be dwelling too much on the past because of a lack of confidence? What if you just focused on the now? Could you try to focus mainly on the good things about your job, and put concrete names on what you’re not ok with, and find a course or reading material to address that?

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice.
I suppose I really doubt myself about things.
Especially when I start something new.
When I got my job I was unemployed(Working on a family farm) for years. I had almost forgot how to talk to people.
I just applied for something on a whim and talked myself into it.
I was terrified and wanted to run away and I got used to it and now I get on with customers, I'm not afraid to talk, I can sell items,often have good sales, have product knowledge, deal with complaints. Yes the odd thing goes wrong and you've to deal with a tricky customers but it all works out. I do worry about something going badly wrong but that's just me.

However if I bump into certain people. They'll really speak down to me and be very patronising about where I am in life compared to my siblings,etc. I just bit my tongue and say nothing but I often feel like saying ''At least I know how to speak to people'' or Something similar but for keeping the peace I'd say nothing.

I've just started to learn to drive after a failed attempt years ago and that's when all the negativity is in my head again now. I've just started. So, I'm just moving off, going into 2nd gear, stopping, etc but It's improving, it goes wrong sometimes and I'm just trying my best to stay focused.
I know if I bump into certain people and they'll know I'm learning to drive. They'll make loads of stupid comments and keep on asking have I passed my test yet,etc. So, that all adds to my dread.

I suppose they might be something up but lots our issues, quirks, etc and it's mainly other people who make us feel bad about things.
I'll look into things that have been mentioned in the thread.

PS.I can take a joke and sometimes when you do something wrong it can be hilarious among friends. However on forums message boards such as this try and not put people down about spelling, etc because it can really put people down.(Ye seem sound tough).

HildaOgdenx

Sounds like you're doing well so as others have said, try to put the past, where it belongs, behind you. I'm not sure there would be a lot to learn from reports from when you were a child, but that's something only you can decide. I don't know what the pathway is to look for a diagnosis of some sort, as an adult, but it might be worth researching and you could decide if it is something you want to pursue.

For now, keep on with the driving, and ignore what others have to say. It's none of their business, and think of it as, they must have very empty lives, if they have time to pass comments on you. You can't control what others say, but what you can control is how you react. So, you decide, am I going to let some 'joker' get to me, or am I just going to think, to hell with you, what's it got to do with you anyway, whether I have passed my test or not.

Believe me when I say, everyone doubts themselves. Most people cover it up, and I know the expression is overused but 'fake it 'til you make it'. Lastly, you do come across as a really sound person. That's not something to dismiss, it's a strength in itself.

Neyite

Bumping into certain people seems to be your main stumbling block. There are some people in life for whom the only way they can feel good about themselves is to put others down. I bet if you thought back to many more encounters you'd see a pattern, particularly around times when you did something great. And once you see that it's them, and not you, it helps a lot when the digs come flying.

You are skilled at sales. Do you know how hard that can be for many people? I'm awful at it, and there's others that would be having panic attacks at the thought of being in a sales role. And Sales is about thinking quickly on your feet, that doesn't sound slow to me.

You also sound skilled at conflict resolution and customer complaints. Again that takes a particular skill that not a lot of people have.

There's a quiz I took years ago that I found really good at identifying soft skills I didn't even know I had. It was called "now, discover your strengths" All too often we just plug away at the stuff identified as our weaknesses when really we are all weak at stuff, and should really focus on where we really shine. It's well worth a look.

B.A._Baracus

'Your a lovely fella but your just a bit slow'' - no other way to take that but as an insult, op. I can see why that stayed with you for years. Even if it was said in a nice soft, smiley tone.... only a pr*ck says that.

For what it's worth you ain't slow. You sound like you lack some confidence and a lot of people can have that. The problem is when you have that you second guess yourself, even when things are going alright you start to think... overly think... then doubt. Then that effects.

I am a firm believer in having a baseline level of self-worth. Like you don't let people use you, you don't let people treat you like a fool, you don't think you're a piece of thrash / idiot I could go on. It's a paradigm that consists of various things. So believe in yourself more

KerryConnor

You are obviously a very articulate, intelligent person going by your posts. And empathetic because you re good at sales. But maybe you do process things slower than others. And nothing at all wrong with that. We all process at different speeds. There are advantages to being able to move slowly and think deeply.
My son struggled for years in school. For example he found learning to read very difficult but it wasn't dyslexia. We eventually met this amazing psychologist who assessed him and said while parts of his IQ (fluid reasoning, verbal, visual spatial) were very high, other parts (his processing speed and working memory) were very low.

It was so great getting this knowledge because suddenly we were able to help him in the right ways. Suddenly the fact that he often doesn't know what time or day it is for example made sense. We were able to find strategies to help him and we had much more patience when helping him organise himself. The self awareness he gained made him feel a lot more confident. He is lovely, witty, clever teenage boy who has good friends but his confidence was being worn away because he can find it hard to follow what people are saying and he finds organisation and planning really difficult.

As a psycholist said to me when assessing my son, he might not be the "surgeon" but he might be the "radiologist" , ie someone who needs to move slower to ensure they are correct.

Both me and my husband also process slowly and difficulties Ive myself had in the past suddenly made sense. As you say, it takes a while to pick things up but you eventually get there. Perseverance is a fantastic quality that not everyone has, particularly "quick" people.

Now your situation may be different but a few things you said rang a bell.

I read a super book about slow processing called "bright kids who cant keep up". You might find it interesting . The message was to learn about yourself, accept the way you are and find strategies to adapt.

You ve already found a job that you re good at and enjoy. Most people find sales really difficult and many people sadly dont enjoy their jobs at all. Very well done to you on that!

Blush_01

amislow wrote: »

Thanks for the advice.
I suppose I really doubt myself about things.
Especially when I start something new.
When I got my job I was unemployed(Working on a family farm) for years. I had almost forgot how to talk to people.
I just applied for something on a whim and talked myself into it.
I was terrified and wanted to run away and I got used to it and now I get on with customers, I'm not afraid to talk, I can sell items,often have good sales, have product knowledge, deal with complaints. Yes the odd thing goes wrong and you've to deal with a tricky customers but it all works out. I do worry about something going badly wrong but that's just me.

However if I bump into certain people. They'll really speak down to me and be very patronising about where I am in life compared to my siblings,etc. I just bit my tongue and say nothing but I often feel like saying ''At least I know how to speak to people'' or Something similar but for keeping the peace I'd say nothing.

I've just started to learn to drive after a failed attempt years ago and that's when all the negativity is in my head again now. I've just started. So, I'm just moving off, going into 2nd gear, stopping, etc but It's improving, it goes wrong sometimes and I'm just trying my best to stay focused.
I know if I bump into certain people and they'll know I'm learning to drive. They'll make loads of stupid comments and keep on asking have I passed my test yet,etc. So, that all adds to my dread.

I suppose they might be something up but lots our issues, quirks, etc and it's mainly other people who make us feel bad about things.
I'll look into things that have been mentioned in the thread.

PS.I can take a joke and sometimes when you do something wrong it can be hilarious among friends. However on forums message boards such as this try and not put people down about spelling, etc because it can really put people down.(Ye seem sound tough).

Every time I start a new job, I ask myself if I'm a bit thick or if there's something wrong with me. Everyone seems better, faster, more plugged in, sounds smarter. I'm not a stupid person (my skills are stronger in verbal reasoning, my "performance" is weaker) but I notice how much "better" other people are, because I see all of my work, and only part of theirs.

I hated learning how to drive. I felt like there were too many things to remember to do all the time, like I'd never get it. I have my full license for 10 years now and I was driving 1,000km a week on average before COVID-19. Things will fall into place for you - you might never love it (a friend of mine is a very smart and capable person, highly intelligent, and he's been described my his driving instructor as "not a natural driver"). Not everything comes naturally to us. You just need to ignore the dopes who want to compare you to other people. We all have our own talents. Not everyone can be amazing at everything, otherwise we'd all be dull and uninteresting.

Faith

I have a PhD and I bloody hated learning to drive. It took me years to commit to it, and I still feel anxiety and dread when I think about it. Failed my test the first time. I actually said to my husband the other day, if I had to learn to drive again, knowing how hard it was, I just wouldn’t bother.

Like Blush, I now drive hundreds a miles a week at times, in Ireland, the UK and on the other side of the road in Canada. Finding learning to drive hard isn’t a sign of any learning difficulties!

mikemac2

If you are working in sales and doing it well you have a skill than most people do not have and never will.

For some working in sales would be hell on earth. Cold calling would have them shaking like a leaf.

Fair play OP

LegacyUser

I’m sorry your manager said something like that to you. It may seem small, but comments like that stick with people.

A few years ago, I had a next door neighbour say something terrible to me (not terrible to the average person but I was unknowingly suffering from depression and my anxiety was crippling). I was shy around people that I didn’t know personally, or those whom I felt a bad “vibe” from. Anyway, it was Christmas Eve and she pushed her way through the door (even though nobody liked her, not really as she had an awful personality), was laughing with one of my relatives and turned to me to say this “And [blank], what will Santa be giving you this year? A personality, perhaps.” I found it awfully upsetting.

My point in sharing that story is that people will be nasty just because they can, or because they think you’re inferior. You’re not inferior. Those that feel the need to go out of their way to say something like that really just reveal themselves.

JustAThought

Cbeatty wrote: »

I’m sorry your manager said something like that to you. It may seem small, but comments like that stick with people.

A few years ago, I had a next door neighbour say something terrible to me (not terrible to the average person but I was unknowingly suffering from depression and my anxiety was crippling). I was shy around people that I didn’t know personally, or those whom I felt a bad “vibe” from. Anyway, it was Christmas Eve and she pushed her way through the door (even though nobody liked her, not really as she had an awful personality), was laughing with one of my relatives and turned to me to say this “And [blank], what will Santa be giving you this year? A personality, perhaps.” I found it awfully upsetting.

My point in sharing that story is that people will be nasty just because they can, or because they think you’re inferior. You’re not inferior. Those that feel the need to go out of their way to say something like that really just reveal themselves.

I cannot believe somebody said this to you least of all a neighbour. How utterly appalling. And I hope somebody stuck up for you even if it was Christmastime - people like that should be pulled short and told they cannot treat people like that - some people are let away with all
kinds of cruelty and shocking behaviour because they are damaged or hve had a bad past but there comes a time when it has to be stopped or simeone take them to one side and check them. Introverts or quieter people cannot be casually abused like that even if the person has something badly wrong with them.

OP - You sound very articulate and intelligent and have very well thought out logic. Your boss saw your strengths and good character and personal skills and chose you despite you having no experience in sales and they were right - you have proven him right by your successes in work.
It sounds like you hold yourself up and compare yourself badly to your siblings and from all of this comparisons may have a bit of low self esteem. - My brother was a genuis at maths and I was rubbish at it in school - it took years for my parents to realise they couldn’t ‘fix’ this in me and years of grinds, extra classes, investigations and heartbreaking stress and failure in exams - luckily I had some balancing academic things I was exceptional in or it would have been very difficult for me mentally. Ironically I turned out to be exceptionally good at finance and acountancy - people who saw me crucified by maths all those years at school cannot believe how it turned out for me (I changed career much later & retrained) as they saw me struggle for years.

Strengths and successes can come from different perspectives, different focuses in a subject, different teachers and life opportunities/environments etc.

I would absolutely not look back and would focus on what you have and how successful you are at it and build on that and ignore the nattering neighbours and those who are so mean minded and have little else to say thaN to compare you to
your siblings. ( to your face !!?!!!)

You are a different oerson to the person who drifted about on the farm doing tasks, and to the person who you were at college and in junior level student placements. You now have a successful career and a new profession and are good at it. Leave whatever one day half baked report was made about you when you were a teenager where it should be - in an obsolete old filing cabinet drawer covered with dust. Don’t be looking into who you were one day for a specific hour five or ten years ago. You have a new life, a new outlook, a new career aNd a great chance of a brilliant, happy and successful new life - don’t throw a spanner in your success by trying to downplay your hopes and find a reason to suport the nayseighers and prove them right and set yourself up for failure.

We all have had traumas and glitches in our education and negative people slapping us down with a compliment and negative excuse for them not putting in effort or properly doing their job in nurturing and managing solutions. You have a great future ahead - dont go looking for old files in obsolete companies to hold you back and pull you down. Look at how far you have come and how much you have achieved and keep building on your strengths and creating opportunities for growth for yourself. You are doing a great job and growing your future. Keep proving them wrong and narrowminded in their traditional outlooks on what pathways to careers work, and keep being that lovely guy everyone likes who is building his future and not stuck in a mean minded phrase and on some things that didnt go to plan in your past. We all have them - we just have to step over them as obstacles on our road and not hide behind them and let them become excuses and barriers to our journey.

You my friend are doing a great job and are not stupid or slow. We all do things differently and at different paces and in different ways. Remember the childhood fable of the hare and the toirtoise - it is told for a reason. And there are many ways to skin a rabbit too!!! I
think you’re just not allowed use that phrase nowadays as much but it is very true!!!

Keep up the great pathway and successes and don’t let the traditionalists and cranks and past hold you down or keep you back - you are already on your way to success and a bright new future. You are successful and a great guy - everyone says so - believe them - and keep building your bright new future .