People who stick up for themselves impressively

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Have you ever witnessed anything like that?

Six or seven years ago, on a hot, sunny day in Dublin, I was drinking with friends at Grand Canal Dock. There are berths there and there were groups dotted around them with an adjacent pub selling cans. There were also gangs of teenagers in wetsuits jumping into the water and blatantly intentionally soaking the drinking groups as they were jumping in. I know how dirty the water in the Grand Canal basin is so it was disgusting.

They kept doing this and people were getting pissed off. Next thing, a woman confronts them. Not Irish. I think she was maybe German or Polish. I thought “She doesn’t know what she’s getting herself in for”. She told them she knew exactly what they were doing and to stop it. There was a brief back and forth argument with plenty of backchat from the teenagers. I thought “Great, they going to ramp up their splashing efforts” but they stopped. They made a few weak parting shot comments but they actually stopped. I could only look on in awe at the woman.

The second time I witnessed something as impressive was on a train from Galway to Dublin a few years ago. There was two lads in our carriage sitting across from each other, drinking. I’m not against people having a few drinks on the train if they don’t bother anyone. But these guys were bothering people. They were making loud, rude comments about everyone who walked past them, they were grabbing at people, they were especially bothering those across the aisle from them. Finally, a woman across the aisle from them (again, not Irish, Southern European) starts shouting at them “Shut up. You think you are so funny but you just sound stupid. Just shut up!”. Again, a bit of resistance from them but then not a peep out of them for the rest of the journey.

Again I was in awe and it got me wondering, are some cultures more forthright? Are Irish people too meek?

Anyone got any similar tales?

I did a dumb ass thing awhile back but I am glad I did it. I would not do it again or recommend anyone else do it. Probably get your injured or killed. Probably should have gotten me injured or killed.

It is not a short story but I have told it a few times ago and shortened it as much as I can. Basically there was a well known short cut in my area with a low wall. Some teens - mostly lads - started sitting on the wall. Drinking. Smoking. Some weed by the smell too. Leaving an absolute mess. But worst of all they were aggressive bordering on violence with passers by - especially those who used the short cut directly. Even to the point of following one little old lady up the road carrying bags too heavy for her. Telling her they were gonna hurt her and kicking the bags in her hands a few times.

Police were called but did nothing every time. And most residents who complained seemed to do nothing either. But one common theme was that all the people complaining were using words like "scrote" and "irredeemable" and basically suggesting these kids were a lost cause. Just scum - always scum - always will be scum.

I agreed with them for a long time but it was not sitting right with me inside emotionally. I said the words but could not believe them - that mere kids could be beyond reach. Beyond redemption.

So one day - almost without thinking about it and I probably would have thought better of it if I had - I decided to walk past them directly through the short cut. I walked in a way I thought would attract their "attentions". I dressed in a way that made me stand out a little. And when they predictably started in on me I gestured at them without even looking back in a way that I knew would make them come for me.

And they did. And I fought them when attacked. And thank Fk for me I won. Then instead of running off or enraging them further I did a kind of "Morpheus" from the Matrix on one of them where "morpheus" leans over "neo" and said "How did I beat you?". I basically reached down and helped the guy up and said "Dude you are seriously strong for your age I almost didn't beat you there. But do you know why I think I did???".

He was so taken aback by this he asked me how. So I basically started directing him. Saying "Right well stand like you were before - and when you swung in like this what I did was - " and I started giving him/them a little martial arts lesson. For about an hour. Then sitting in the grass after it I just got talking to them like they were people. And when I parted from them I said "Here if I'm coming back this way tomorrow do ya wanna learn anotehr few moves??"

And it went from there. I started training them and talking to them and treating them like actual people. And as I talked to them I occasionally brought up their behaviour with them and suggesting they were being dicks and slowly they opened up about that too.

I still work with them. I developed a "Jedi Curriculum" for a "Jedi School" with a few of my mates and we basically give them a Jedi Training now. I even jokingly call them my Little Jedi now.

And since then they have been helping the same little old lady carry her shopping home. There is another lonely old lady they call over to sometimes too. They get cookies and listen to her go on about her life. Do work in her garden for her. Its nice. When I travelled to Russia for the World Cup and came back they had done up a huge welcome back sign for me and waited for me in the Airport. And when Covid-19 hit we started delivering shopping to people who were high risk and couldnt go to the shops themselves.

These "irredeemable scrotes" turned into upstanding good people in our community and they are continuing to. And all they needed was a grown up to listen to them - give them a little guidance and attention - and a little care. And it has really affected me emotionally and my world view since. It has given me this awful liberal hippy feeling that this world we are in really could be a better place. If only there was a little more love and effort and a discernable path from "here to there". I do not have the answers. Just this deep and discombobulating certainty that there is a crack in humanity that we could fix if only we could look at it clearly.

Then again - I could have been murdered that day. It was - despite the outcome - a dumb ass move of sheer stupid bravado and hope. And my post should not be taken as a recommendation anyone rush out and try and save the world

Deleted User

Deleted User wrote: »

I did a dumb ass thing awhile back but I am glad I did it. I would not do it again or recommend anyone else do it. Probably get your injured or killed. Probably should have gotten me injured or killed.

It is not a short story but I have told it a few times ago and shortened it as much as I can. Basically there was a well known short cut in my area with a low wall. Some teens - mostly lads - started sitting on the wall. Drinking. Smoking. Some weed by the smell too. Leaving an absolute mess. But worst of all they were aggressive bordering on violence with passers by - especially those who used the short cut directly. Even to the point of following one little old lady up the road carrying bags too heavy for her. Telling her they were gonna hurt her and kicking the bags in her hands a few times.

Police were called but did nothing every time. And most residents who complained seemed to do nothing either. But one common theme was that all the people complaining were using words like "scrote" and "irredeemable" and basically suggesting these kids were a lost cause. Just scum - always scum - always will be scum.

I agreed with them for a long time but it was not sitting right with me inside emotionally. I said the words but could not believe them - that mere kids could be beyond reach. Beyond redemption.

So one day - almost without thinking about it and I probably would have thought better of it if I had - I decided to walk past them directly through the short cut. I walked in a way I thought would attract their "attentions". I dressed in a way that made me stand out a little. And when they predictably started in on me I gestured at them without even looking back in a way that I knew would make them come for me.

And they did. And I fought them when attacked. And thank Fk for me I won. Then instead of running off or enraging them further I did a kind of "Morpheus" from the Matrix on one of them where "morpheus" leans over "neo" and said "How did I beat you?". I basically reached down and helped the guy up and said "Dude you are seriously strong for your age I almost didn't beat you there. But do you know why I think I did???".

He was so taken aback by this he asked me how. So I basically started directing him. Saying "Right well stand like you were before - and when you swung in like this what I did was - " and I started giving him/them a little martial arts lesson. For about an hour. Then sitting in the grass after it I just got talking to them like they were people. And when I parted from them I said "Here if I'm coming back this way tomorrow do ya wanna learn anotehr few moves??"

And it went from there. I started training them and talking to them and treating them like actual people. And as I talked to them I occasionally brought up their behaviour with them and suggesting they were being dicks and slowly they opened up about that too.

I still work with them. I developed a "Jedi Curriculum" for a "Jedi School" with a few of my mates and we basically give them a Jedi Training now. I even jokingly call them my Little Jedi now.

And since then they have been helping the same little old lady carry her shopping home. There is another lonely old lady they call over to sometimes too. They get cookies and listen to her go on about her life. Do work in her garden for her. Its nice. When I travelled to Russia for the World Cup and came back they had done up a huge welcome back sign for me and waited for me in the Airport. And when Covid-19 hit we started delivering shopping to people who were high risk and couldnt go to the shops themselves.

These "irredeemable scrotes" turned into upstanding good people in our community and they are continuing to. And all they needed was a grown up to listen to them - give them a little guidance and attention - and a little care. And it has really affected me emotionally and my world view since. It has given me this awful liberal hippy feeling that this world we are in really could be a better place. If only there was a little more love and effort and a discernable path from "here to there". I do not have the answers. Just this deep and discombobulating certainty that there is a crack in humanity that we could fix if only we could look at it clearly.

Then again - I could have been murdered that day. It was - despite the outcome - a dumb ass move of sheer stupid bravado and hope. And my post should not be taken as a recommendation anyone rush out and try and save the world

I really hope this is true.

gmisk

I would tend to let things slide.

Unless it is in the cinema....I have lost it quite a few times with people talking, eating or using their phone.

I did see a man in New York at a play take a woman's phone off her she was near the front and on it the whole time and had been asked politely to put it away... He put it on the ground and smashed it with his shoe!!!

freshpopcorn

I know a man before and he was being a bit of a prat and somebody stood up to him and he went quiet and behaved himself. The thought they were great.
However when there back was turned he took his dick out and rubbed it all over there food!

ILoveYourVibes

Well if you do see this ...in future ..it might be me...i apologize.

Wombatman

Guy on a train arguing with a woman sitting in the seat he booked.

His position: I booked this seat. You are sitting in it. Please move.

Her position: I arrived early to get a seat and sat here. Then the carriage filled up completely. Irish Rail didn't show that the seat was booked in the display so I assumed it was free. I'm not moving now because I won't get a seat. Your problem is with Irish Rail not with me. If they displayed the booking details I would have sat on another free seat. Go take it up with them.

Cue unholy back and fourth that got as heated as it can without getting physical.

I had to admire her for sticking to her guns. I guess she might be branded a Karen in some circles.

ILoveYourVibes

Wombatman wrote: »

Guy on a train arguing with a woman sitting in the seat he booked.

His position: I booked this seat. You are sitting in it. Please move.

Her position: I arrived early to get a seat and sat here. Then the carriage filled up completely. Irish Rail didn't show that the seat was booked in the display so I assumed it was free. I'm not moving now because I won't get a seat. Your problem is with Irish Rail not with me. If they displayed the booking details I would have sat on another free seat. Go take it up with them.

Cue unholy back and fourth that got as heated as it can without getting physical.

I had to admire her for sticking to her guns. I guess she might be branded a Karen in some circles.

I karen that pony home! Im just not racist!

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Wombatman wrote: »

Guy on a train arguing with a woman sitting in the seat he booked.

His position: I booked this seat. You are sitting in it. Please move.

Her position: I arrived early to get a seat and sat here. Then the carriage filled up completely. Irish Rail didn't show that the seat was booked in the display so I assumed it was free. I'm not moving now because I won't get a seat. Your problem is with Irish Rail not with me. If they displayed the booking details I would have sat on another free seat. Go take it up with them.

Cue unholy back and fourth that got as heated as it can without getting physical.

I had to admire her for sticking to her guns. I guess she might be branded a Karen in some circles.

As somebody who really needs the seat I’ve booked on trains, this scenario fills me with dread. I’m with the guy here. The seat number would have been printed on his ticket too. She wasn’t in the right there. She punished the guy, not Irish Rail.

ILoveYourVibes

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

As somebody who really needs the seat I’ve booked on trains, this scenario fills me with dread. I’m with the guy here. The seat number would have been printed on his ticket too.

Well then here is a tip..ask someone from irish rail to show you to your seat.

And if you can't remind her...if she has no ticket for that seat ..when they come to check tickets they will notice hers is not a pre booked ticket etc. So what she is doing is pointless.

Otherwise offer her your lap to sit on.

Alternatively sit on HER lap.

maxsmum

I was outside eating my lunch the other day in an area with plenty of benches and grass to sit on. A well to do looking guy sat on a bench beside a young girl, maybe 20 or so. She looked at him and said 'is there nowhere else for you to sit? have you been WATCHING the news in the last 3 months?'
I thought it was weirder that he sat on a bench when there were other ones free, never mind Covid 19, but fair play to her, she gave him a look of death and he scooted off.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Well then here is a tip..ask someone from irish rail to show you to your seat.

And if you can't remind her...if she has no ticket for that seat ..when they come to check tickets they will notice hers is not a pre booked ticket etc. So what she is doing is pointless.

Otherwise offer her your lap to sit on.

Oh, I would if I had to. I have a damaged spine and would have little patience with some nitpicker keeping me out of my seat on a technicality.

ILoveYourVibes

maxsmum wrote: »

I was outside eating my lunch the other day in an area with plenty of benches and grass to sit on. A well to do looking guy sat on a bench beside a young girl, maybe 20 or so. She looked at him and said 'is there nowhere else for you to sit? have you been WATCHING the news in the last 3 months?'
I thought it was weirder that he sat on a bench when there were other ones free, never mind Covid 19, but fair play to her, she gave him a look of death and he scooted off.

maybe he liked her fair play to her tho

gmisk

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

As somebody who really needs the seat I’ve booked on trains, this scenario fills me with dread. I’m with the guy here. The seat number would have been printed on his ticket too. She wasn’t in the right there. She punished the guy, not Irish Rail.

I agree but there is something at least on the enterprise if you have a booked seat you are meant to turn up 20 minutes before departure
I have turfed a few people out of a booked seat on that train, but the majority of times they have name above seat so pretty hard for them to argue

I want to be that assertive person who stands up for all that's good and right regardless of the possible risk. Working on it.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

gmisk wrote: »

I agree but there is something at least on the enterprise if you have a booked seat you are meant to turn up 20 minutes before departure
I have turfed a few people out of a booked seat on that train, but the majority of times they have name above seat so pretty hard for them to argue

It’s on the ticket too. The name display isn’t the only place it’s noted. The person refusing to budge just looks petty. If that scenario happened to me, I’d have to disclose why I really need the seat which I shouldn’t have to do.

maxsmum

Candie wrote: »

I want to be that assertive person who stands up for all that's good and right regardless of the possible risk. Working on it.

I feel ya. I was in Penney's earlier and there were two kids flying around the shop floor on scooters! With their mother! I wanted to have the balls to tell her to cop on when one of them came to a screeching halt 1cm away from my toes... she was on another planet

tdf7187

I have to say, a propos of nothing, kids from working class areas (not that there's anything wrong with being from a working class area of course) being able to afford wetsuits is pure first world problems. twasn't like that in the 1970s and 1980s anyone can from the area could tell you.

Mostly our way is to do nothing and grumble about it afterwards to someone else. That’s why so many people do that they like and successive governments walk on us. We’re pathetic.

maxsmum

maxsmum wrote: »

I feel ya. I was in Penney's earlier and there were two kids flying around the shop floor on scooters! With their mother! I wanted to have the balls to tell her to cop on when one of them came to a screeching halt 1cm away from my toes... she was on another planet

You’d want to accidentally bump the scooter and hopefully send them to the dentist.

gmisk

gmisk wrote: »

I would tend to let things slide.

Unless it is in the cinema....I have lost it quite a few times with people talking, eating or using their phone.

I did see a man in New York at a play take a woman's phone off her she was near the front and on it the whole time and had been asked politely to put it away... He put it on the ground and smashed it with his shoe!!!

Why do I still feel sooooo lukewarm about revisiting the silver screen again when I can.
Whenever.

newbie18892

I was babysitting my younger siblings once years ago when I was maybe 19 and heard all this roaring and laughing outside at the front of the house. Looked outside through the hall window and saw a group of young lads sitting on the front wall blasting music and drinking cans and kicking a football around. I vaguely knew them but they wouldn't usually hang around like that if my Dad was there I ignored them and went about my evening. Later, after I put the kids to bed, I was watching TV and I could still hear them. I didn't want the kids to wake up. I went into the hallway to check and they sounded closer than before, like they were fully in the front garden.

I don't know what came over me as I'm usually not into confrontation, especially not with groups of lads (as a girl), but I swung open the door. I saw them sitting on the wall and two were in the garden beside my parent's car kicking the football. I shouted "Look lads, would you ever just f**k off out of here. You think you're big hard men but you just look stupid." They heckled back and forth a bit and I said "I'm not moving. I'm standing here until you leave." They all left eventually and I haven't seen them sitting on the wall since. They probably think I was a bit of a b*tch but I'm still glad and surprised I got rid of them

Earthhorse

Not sticking up for himself but I was always impressed with how this guy handled breaking up a fight (NSFW due to language).

KevRossi

I find that if a woman speaks out to boys/men, the woman usually gets some verbals and the men stop.
When a man speaks out to other boys/men, they often take it as a challenge to their dominance and it can quickly escalate. Men also don't want to look immature or 'uncool' in front of women, so they're more likely to stop.

I think we take a lot of crap here off people, but I also think Irish society is more threatening than Germany. I've stood up for things and for people a fair few times, here and when I lived in Germany; Germans are quick to back you up, Irish a lot less so.

KevRossi

KevRossi wrote: »

Germans are quick to back you up, Irish a lot less so.

^^This.

A well documented case was abuse of a Dublin Bus passenger on the 39 bus a few years ago. No other passenger intervened with the abuser.

Cue the keyboard warriors complaining about the lack of intervention for the injured party here on boards.ie

Thing is, would YOU intervene in a situation like that?

Rodney Bathgate

[Deleted User] wrote: »

^^This.

A well documented case was abuse of a Dublin Bus passenger on the 39 bus a few years ago. No other passenger intervened with the abuser.

Cue the keyboard warriors complaining about the lack of intervention for the injured party here on boards.ie

Thing is, would YOU intervene in a situation like that?

Would shouting ‘Ah here, leave it out!’ count as intervention?

Leg End Reject

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I really hope this is true.

Really? Teaching scumbags how to fight?

Ignoring the Dead Poet's Society element in the suspension of belief.

Risingshadoo

KevRossi wrote: »

I find that if a woman speaks out to boys/men, the woman usually gets some verbals and the men stop.
When a man speaks out to other boys/men, they often take it as a challenge to their dominance and it can quickly escalate. Men also don't want to look immature or 'uncool' in front of women, so they're more likely to stop.

I think we take a lot of crap here off people, but I also think Irish society is more threatening than Germany. I've stood up for things and for people a fair few times, here and when I lived in Germany; Germans are quick to back you up, Irish a lot less so.

This, exactly.

Risingshadoo

maxsmum wrote: »

I was outside eating my lunch the other day in an area with plenty of benches and grass to sit on. A well to do looking guy sat on a bench beside a young girl, maybe 20 or so. She looked at him and said 'is there nowhere else for you to sit? have you been WATCHING the news in the last 3 months?'
I thought it was weirder that he sat on a bench when there were other ones free, never mind Covid 19, but fair play to her, she gave him a look of death and he scooted off.

Nah she's a cow, probably a Dublin cow. She could have just told him politely to observe social distancing. I'd have told her to f off.

Truthvader

Eoghan murphy facing down Sinn Fein Rentamob thugs at the election count in the last election. Know not everyones man but in fairness could not build a million houses in 18 months. Politics regardless displayed more courage than anyone in the mob

andekwarhola

I agree with the person that pointed out that a woman admonishing male teenagers in these situations definitely has a better chance of avoiding a physical confrontation.

pgj2015

Lads holiday in Magaluf a few years ago. we stayed in accommodation mostly full of Brits. anyway about 4 days in this gang of English arseholes moved in, for the next couple of days they were going around trying to intimidate everyone, shouting racist abuse from their balcony, singing songs about how great jimmy saville was etc, just looking for attention.

A group of Irish women moved in around the same time these dregs moved in.

one morning the English pricks were going around roaring and banging on everyones doors at 7 in the morning, next thing we hear one of the Irish girls roaring, "what the fcuk do you fcuking English **** think you are at, roaring and kicking doors at 7 in the morning, go back to your fcukin rooms and stop acting like children you fcukin dickheads"

The lads didnt say a word and that was the end of the noise. I thought it was very impressive for 1 girl to take on a whole group of lads like that and put them in their place, these lads were absolute filth, only there to cause trouble.

They had belted on our door one of the days before, I was near the door and opened it and said what? yer man just looked at me and didnt say anything. They thought they were tough in a group but the girl definitely put them in their place.

uch

Have to say Gearóid Mac Adaim and Martin McGuinness would be top of the league

Rodney Bathgate

uch wrote: »

Have to say Gearóid Mac Adaim and Martin McGuinness would be top of the league

Gerry certainly stood up for his brother, the paedo.

Blush_01

Risingshadoo wrote: »

This, exactly.

Have to agree. Was on a bus in the city centre years ago, some time between 2004-2007, and an older, drunk asshole was picking on an Eastern European woman who had the audacity to speak her native language on the phone.

He called her every name under the sun, accused her of taking people's jobs, blah-de-blah. He was rotten to her.

Telling him to do one was grand until he got physically aggressive and spat at me, then threatened to have me shot (I maybe shouldn't have laughed at him?). Anyway, I was was on my own, and the majority of the other people on the bus were female and on their own too.

I threatened to call the gardaí, rang a friend instead, and he hopped off the bus two seconds later at the next stop. I often wonder how he survived when the recession hit and there were no more jobs for him to pretend someone else had taken. He must have been devo.