my wife doesn't know my will proposals

sisters

I want to make a will but my wife doesn't . Can I make it without her?
obviously our family home will be divided between our children but I have a few possessions that I would like to leave to one of my children only . my wife wouldn't agree with it so I want to do it myself. However with covid it might be difficult to get to a solicitor. what advise can you give me please.

Hunchback

sisters wrote: »

I want to make a will but my wife doesn't . Can I make it without her?
obviously our family home will be divided between our children but I have a few possessions that I would like to leave to one of my children only . my wife wouldn't agree with it so I want to do it myself. However with covid it might be difficult to get to a solicitor. what advise can you give me please.

You should be able to get to a solicitor to make a will, assuming you have the transportation means. Most solicitor offices are open.

You are perfectly entitled to make your own will and leave those possessions to one of your children. Your solicitor will advise you as to what will happen with the family home, but, if you and your wife own it as joint owners when you die, ownership of it will pass wholly to her on your passing.

sisters

Thank you. I'll ring now to arrange.

sisters

I found a site online called law depot which enables you to do a will online for €20 . Does anyone know if these are legit?

Hunchback

sisters wrote: »

I found a site online called law depot which enables you to do a will online for €20 . Does anyone know if these are legit?

The fee for having your Will done by a solicitor is relatively small. You would be well advised to instruct a solicitor.

Tallan's Solicitors in Drogheda (and they're in Ashbourne too) did a will for free, for us. They just do wills for free as part of their day to day business as far as I know. I'm sure they're not the only ones.

I presume they can charge for the actual execution of the will when the time comes, so perhaps it's a scheme to make money down the line, but it was definitely free when the will was made.

sisters

Thank you that's good to know

Peregrinus

sisters wrote: »

I found a site online called law depot which enables you to do a will online for €20 . Does anyone know if these are legit?

It may or may not be legit but, even if it is, it doesn't mean that it will be suitable to your needs.

You're in a slighly non-standard situation here, as a married person making a will without your spouse making a corresponding will. You need a bit of advice on any pitfalls that might result from this. Plus, your OP suggests that you believe you are in a position to dispose of [a share in?] the family home by will, leaving it to your children; this may or may not be the case, depending on the terms on which the family home is currently held.

So, yeah, talk to an actual live solicitor. Do not rely on a website that goes through a routine set of depersonalised standardised questions.

wassie

All good advice here. Also have a read of the Citizens information website on this topic of if you haven't already.
https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/death/before_a_death/making_a_will.html

Quite a few law firms will also do appointments over video/remotely. It is important that a will is structured to suit your needs and you understand how it operates to ensure your intents will be delivered, especially if you are survived by your wife, if god forbid, something happens to you both at the same time.

CIARAN_BOYLE

sisters wrote: »

I found a site online called law depot which enables you to do a will online for €20 . Does anyone know if these are legit?

I could write a will. I'd be happy with it.

I know my personal circumstances and dont need complex legal advice.

You could probably do the same very easily except you do need legal advice. The fee for a will isnt a drafting fee. It's for the advice.

sisters

thanks for the sound advice everyone. Really appreciate it!

TheBoyConor

sisters wrote: »

............obviously our family home will be divided between our children ..........

So basically you want your children to all fall out with eachother?
That's what happens in these type of wills.

Most vulnerable child gets the house.
Most secure and ahead child gets the least.
Everyone else gets something on a sliding scale in between.

sabat

Discovering a previously unknown will after your death would probably cause a lot of hurt for your wife for the rest of her life. Are the items in question particularly valuable or just sentimental?

Think carefully about leaving something to one child only, which may be seen as favouring them above the others.
Maybe it's something that has no monetary value but is a shared interest between you and this child?
Maybe your other children would understand your reasons?

The fact that your wife doesn't agree with you tells me that you need to have a think about it carefully.
The message that you will be leaving for your other children needs to be considered.

sisters

basically I have a lovely motorhome that I want to give to my son.He is my favourite yes also because he is the only one of them who ever has had any time for me and my wife. Is that so wrong to want to leave something nice to my favourite son.?

It may cause a lot of animosity and resentment, OP.

Do the brothers currently get along?

sisters

They get on well enough but wouldn't be close

TheBoyConor

I wouldn't be too concerned about a motorhome driving an intergenerational wedge. It is only a vehicle and probably not worth a huge amount.

If it was land, then that is a different story. Nothing divides Irish families like a patch of land. It would turn twins on eachother.

Pawwed Rig

sisters wrote: »

They get on well enough but wouldn't be close

I worked on a case a few years ago that the value of the Estate was reduced by 80% by the time it was distributed due to the wife disagreeing with the husband (post mortem) and the 3 sons not liking the way the mother divided the assets.
I guarantee that even a few years later none of the sons are talking to each other.

Why not put the motor home in their name now? Then there is no need to be going behind anyone back?

salmocab

I wonder if you pass first is the motor home yours alone to give to your son? Seems to me you wife probably already or possibly owns half of it.

@OP

@OP are you intending to die soon?

I ask half in jest and half in earnest. If I’m to assume that you get on well with your wife, except for the disagreement on this issue, I’d be inclined to leave well enough alone. There’s nothing stopping you offering the motor home at a greatly discounted rate years from now, to your chosen son- while your still alive and have finished with it.

I would consider how your wife may feel after your death. There are other ways you can express your gratitude to your son while your still alive.

ldy4mxonucwsq6

sisters wrote: »

I want to make a will but my wife doesn't . Can I make it without her?
obviously our family home will be divided between our children but I have a few possessions that I would like to leave to one of my children only . my wife wouldn't agree with it so I want to do it myself. However with covid it might be difficult to get to a solicitor. what advise can you give me please.

You really need to get advice on this, it's not that straightforward. In the case of a family home your wife will inherit your interest automatically making the house completely hers if you die first.

She will also be entitled to her share of your 'estate' whatever that is comprised of.

Get proper professional advice.

TheBoyConor

salmocab wrote: »

I wonder if you pass first is the motor home yours alone to give to your son? Seems to me you wife probably already or possibly owns half of it.

it is a vehicle. it is owned by whoever is named on the vehicle licence certificate or tax book. You can't have 2 people on it.

TheBoyConor

if you want to give it to him you don't need a will. Just sell it to him for €1 and get the change of ownership form sorted with Shannon.

It is not a quarter acre of boggy land that men will fall out with their family over we are dealing with here. It is a vehicle that will probably be chinese razor blades scrap in 20 years one way or the other.

Pawwed Rig

TheBoyConor wrote: »

if you want to give it to him you don't need a will. Just sell it to him for €1 and get the change of ownership form sorted with Shannon.

Doesn't work like that. Transfers between related parties are at market value so a 'sale' for €1 will be a gift at the MV less €1 less small gift exemption thereby reducing the group A threshold by a (possibly) significant amount for that child.

screamer

TheBoyConor wrote: »

if you want to give it to him you don't need a will. Just sell it to him for €1 and get the change of ownership form sorted with Shannon.

It is not a quarter acre of boggy land that men will fall out with their family over we are dealing with here. It is a vehicle that will probably be chinese razor blades scrap in 20 years one way or the other.

It doesn’t take much for kids to feel wronged by wills. Personally I’d never have a favourite child they all mean the same to me, and if one is to be favoured over the others in a will, then at least leave some context as to why, so the others can reconcile themselves with it. Wills are easy someone to make, they won’t be around to see the fallout, but the repercussions can destroy the family left behind.

No matter what you opt to do in your will, someone will have a better idea. OP, you know your family better than the rest of us. Do what you see fit to do, personally, yourself.

Mrs OBumble

TheBoyConor wrote: »

if you want to give it to him you don't need a will. Just sell it to him for €1 and get the change of ownership form sorted with Shannon.

Doing this may cause problems when he comes to insure it.

St. Westy

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

Doing this may cause problems when he comes to insure it.

i dont see how? i have a car i rarely drive and sometimes i forget to sign it off the road, so instead of paying back tax i change ownership or *sell* it to my father, so its taxed as a new purchase and no back tax, and never a issue with insurance?

op why dont you just sell it to your son now, tell your son to express interest in it in front of your wife and play along with it, far easier

sisters

so do you mean sell it to him now and i continue to drive it for the time being?

St. Westy

sisters wrote: »

so do you mean sell it to him now and i continue to drive it for the time being?

well what's stopping you having a convo with your son about your thoughts, you never know, your son might not even want it, and then that's your answer,
going behind your families back , will cause unneeded stress when you pass,
if your son does actually want it, then put it in his name and drive it with your open drive, its a more reasonable way then sneaking around, in my opinion,
best of luck whatever you chose

sisters

yes you are right. That's probably best for everyone