We have updated our Privacy Notice, you can read the updated document here
Mods please check the Moderators Group for an important update on Mod tools. If you do not have access to the group, please PM Niamh. Thanks!

funerals

Comments

  • #2


    Will this unfortunate virus change our attitude away from the traditional Irish funeral?

    Have a close friend who lost her Dad last week (though not Covid 19), she said she was very happy with the funeral director's handling of the whole thing allowing a few more family members in at different times to spend a few minutes with her Dad, one thing she was thankful for was not having to shake hands with hundreds of strangers (nothing to do with the virus). She reckoned there was a lot to be said for a quiet funeral. I know many people who turn up at removals cars doing it out of respect but is queueing for several hours to sympathise really a good thing? Many are doing it as they feel they should, not because they want to, only to disappear before prayers and maybe not see the relatives of the deceased for months or years again. I'd personally like to see this aspect change. I remember when my own Dad died 30 years ago what I wanted more than anything else but for the duration of the funeral and several days afterwards was some time alone but was denied it.


  • #2


    Personally i just go to funerals if i knew the person who has left us or an immediate family member.
    I think a load of rubbish shaking hands with people you not know.
    I read lately that there online condone thing now which seems like good idea...


  • #2


    personally i would like to have funeral private no one calling and pretending they cared the only people who should attend a funeral are those that attended the deceased during their last years and in most house thats only ever a handful of folk especially when a person is old.


  • #2


    hate seeing people turn up at funerals who wouldn't give the deceased the time of day when they were alive, or hadn't seen or spoken to them
    in years. Worse is the wake, when all and sundry parade past the deceased for a macarbe last look, and to say how lovely or peaceful they look.... weird, weird, weird. Don't intrude on funerals unless i knew the deceased and would have been in regular contact with them. I prefer to send a card than shake hands, which is utterly exhausting on the family, and of zero use. Dignity is so important but TBH the traditional come all yiz of the Irish funeral erodes that.


  • #2


    I have specified in my Advanced Directive /Will that my funeral be minimal and very quiet/private. My next of kin know this and it will be respected. And my doing this has taken the burden off them.

    In the past when I have been too ill to attend I have waited s few weeks then written to the family; it is valued when it has gone very quiet and empty for them.
    NB I am English and wakes are not usually done.


  • #2


    I think it depends who has died. When my eight month old son died, it was an enormous comfort to me when all my colleagues and most of my husband's workplace turned up at the funeral. I had been afraid that his short existence would have gone completely unremarked. It really helped to know that so many people cared.


Society & Culture