Alcohol is killing my family and it's OK for off licenses to supply them?

Sounds

This may mean nothing to some people, but it means a lot to me.
I just want to get a few things off my chest when I have a clear head.

Spirits in my opinion is worse than many drugs, I've seen what damage it does to people, how they become and many end up dead because of it.

Alcohol kills 100's of people every year in Ireland.
Breaks up families, destroys lives and leaves loved ones behind to deal with the aftermath of losing someone they care about, your friends, your family.

I'm kind of embarrassed typing this because I know people just accept that alcohol is one of those things you either deal with, or you don't. You're on you own to deal with your daemons in most cases. And many try to get help with their issues but deep down they can't quit or don't really want to quit, alcohol addiction is a horrible sickness that leads to health issues, mental health issues, brain damage, heart attacks, liver cancer, and most likely injury and unfortunately for many, disability and death.

What kind of country am I living in, it's not just Ireland I'm aware of that.

You can crawl into a supermarket or any off license sick as a dog and purchase alcohol (spirits) that may be the cause of your downfall, that is just sad.

I've been in supermarkets where the staff knew of people who ended up in care from falls related to alcohol bought on their premises, I feel like smacking someone when they ask how's your friend or family member doing in hospital, when they probably know the cause of their disability, it's so wrong.

You're entitled to a drink if you want, nobody can make you stop.

Think about this, if your friend or a family member got sick or died from any other drug, their supplier would be hunted down and put in jail where they belong right? If they were lucky. So why are supermarkets and off licenses allowed to fuel people's addictions? it's wrong and they hold no responsibilities even when they're providing the substances that destroying people's lives.

I see it all the time with friends and family, people buying drink at lunch time. You just give up on life and that's not good. You become what some might call a retard, you know what I mean, people try to talk to you, get angry with you to no avail and all you can do is make up excuses, lie and slur your words.

It's upsetting for anyone to look at, even if you're on your last legs you won't stop, but the off licenses will keep serving you, until you eventually die from it.

I blame our government, I don't care if someone wants to try tell me "but you don't have to do it, it's your own fault" that's not true at all. People lose control of their lives, give up on themselves and lose any form of contact from loved ones, maybe the only ones that can help them, or at least try.

I've been there myself, with drugs and alcohol addiction in my younger years. When I use to smoke I never drank and I know if it was legal, half the country would quit drinking and that has to be a good thing. But our government are too stupid and ignorant to give it a go and see if it actually helps people, they're only interested in the taxes they make from these unfortunates.

I stayed off alcohol for 5 years, after Christmas 2015 I had enough and said I'd try keep sober, I started having the odd beer again this year, after a few drinks at Christmas, I usually only drink when I'm out, and I love going to gigs, but I don't enjoy it and I never really drank for the taste. Even TV ads use to make me want a drink, I couldn't shake it, but it made me sick, I don't want to feel like that ever again, I have good and bad days like everyone.

Nobody known what I went through because like many, you don't tell anyone or even admit to yourself that you have a problem. Of course there are many that would try convince you and themselves you never had issues, I tend to give people with that mentality the cold shoulder, because you know they haven't a clue. The kind of people that probably think you're beyond help and better off dead, but how could you blame them when you're messed up like that, I guess you find out who your friends are when you need them, if you're lucky or capable of finding help, lots of people are not in that position.

But I'm not talking about people that go out for a few sociable drinks, I'm talking about people that have gone over the edge and they can't stop.

I use to know a lot of smokers in my day and none of them were ever in any danger of injuring themselves, they just got stupefied and chilled out, talked, listened to music, played games and enjoyed each other's company. Not saying drugs are good for anyone, they're not, but alcohol will literally destroy your life and those around you that still love you. That won't stop an alcoholic.

I do know what I'm talking about because I've been around it my whole life, I went to the stage where I couldn't stand being around drunk people, I still can't, except if I'm out with a girl, then it's just having a few drinks and a buzz with you woman, or friends, a lot of people don't have good friends either.

Trying to stay sober every day becomes impossible for many people, I feel for them but they become something nobody really wants to be around and people fall out over it also, this country has serious issues with alcohol abuse.

I do understand that many people have their own way of escaping the reality of life, for whatever reasons, through drugs or alcohol or whatever else. I don't hold it against anyone. I'm not like that now thank god but there's times when you can enjoy a drink, but not every day of the week.

What really sickens me is the fact that this country is full of alcoholics that would probably come up with excuses to defend this daemon, rather than try come up with positive ways to help people stop killing themselves.

And it's really sad when we all know alcohol destroys people's lives as much as any drug out there, when it's consumed in heavy doses, you become reckless once this drug gets a hold of you, I'm sorry for your pain.

You can say off licenses don't know people have issues with alcohol, but they're the ones supplying the drugs that will kill 100's of people in Ireland every year, why are they not held responsible? Why are there not stricter regulations.

Have you ever sat with someone on their death bed because they lost control of their life due to alcohol? I have and it's not a pleasant experience. Someone you love but you can't do anything to help, all they want to do is go asleep and not wake up, well if you drink enough that may be your ticket out of this life.

Thanks for reading

GoneHome

What in god's name was all that about....... I gave up reading after the first few paragraphs, couldn't make head nor tail of it :rolleyes:

happyoutscan

GoneHome wrote: »

What in god's name was all that about....... I gave up reading after the first few paragraphs, couldn't make head nor tail of it :rolleyes:

It was easy to understand, but don't let that get in the way of you fishing for 'thanks'.

u140acro3xs7dm

Sounds wrote: »

You can crawl into a supermarket or any off license sick as a dog and purchase alcohol (spirits) that may be the cause of your downfall, that is just sad.

I've been in supermarkets where the staff knew of people who ended up in care from falls related to alcohol bought on their premises, I feel like smacking someone when they ask how's your friend or family member doing in hospital, when they probably know the cause of their disability, it's so wrong.

You're entitled to a drink if you want, nobody can make you stop.

Think about this, if your friend or a family member got sick or died from any other drug, their supplier would be hunted down and put in jail where they belong right? If they were lucky. So why are supermarkets and off licenses allowed to fuel people's addictions? it's wrong and they hold no responsibilities even when they're providing the substances that destroying people's lives.

Should employees of shops stop serving calorific food to overweight people ?

As you mention “You're entitled to a drink if you want, nobody can make you stop.” If you are incredibly drunk, then you shouldn’t be served more alcohol, but if you purchase it sober, it’s not the shops responsibility

Sounds wrote: »

I blame our government, I don't care if someone wants to try tell me "but you don't have to do it, it's your own fault" that's not true at all. People lose control of their lives, give up on themselves and lose any form of contact from loved ones, maybe the only ones that can help them, or at least try.

I've been there myself, with drugs and alcohol addiction in my younger years. When I use to smoke I never drank and I know if it was legal, half the country would quit drinking and that has to be a good thing. But our government are too stupid and ignorant to give it a go and see if it actually helps people, they're only interested in the taxes they make from these unfortunates.

You are just blaming other people here rather than talking about people having any personal responsibility.
Prohibition never works, drugs are banned, but the drug problem is worse than ever.

Sounds wrote: »

I use to know a lot of smokers in my day and none of them were ever in any danger of injuring themselves, they just got stupefied and chilled out, talked, listened to music, played games and enjoyed each other's company. Not saying drugs are good for anyone, they're not, but alcohol will literally destroy your life and those around you that still love you. That won't stop an alcoholic.

Smoking isn’t healthy either, especially if you are smoking cigarettes between spliffs. Should we ban tobacco and then nobody will smoke anymore?

Sounds wrote: »

You can say off licenses don't know people have issues with alcohol, but they're the ones supplying the drugs that will kill 100's of people in Ireland every year, why are they not held responsible? Why are there not stricter regulations.

The Government are constantly trying to implement more restrictive measures, and they don’t seem to be working. Prohibition, minimum pricing, shorter hours – none of it will work. We need to educate our younger people properly, not bate them with a stick.

Graces7

OP; thank you. a post to read and remember.

Sounds

Thanks for reading, just a few thoughts on the subject of alcohol addiction.

Be well and good health!

Graces7

Sounds wrote: »

Thanks for reading, just a few thoughts on the subject of alcohol addiction.

Be well and good health!

Thank you and hoping it has helped to talk and share?

Sounds

I don't think it will make much of a difference Grace,
People will still drink, awareness is important and it's good to talk about the issues.
We know what the problem is and how easy it is for someone to slip over the edge.
Recovery from any addiction is hard, it's down to the individual if they can get help.
For many people it's just not that simple, it's there only escape for the realities of life.

Spanish Eyes

Sorry to read of the struggles you describe. But there should be no restrictions on the sale or consumption of alcohol. Enough of the nanny State already. The sale and consumption of alcohol is legal, and until it is made illegal, that's where we are.

Alcoholics will not generally accept help unless they reach rock bottom and decide to help themselves. THEN the State should step in and help them for sure.

I doubt anyone would expect that a person in a supermarket or retail off license should be the arbiter as to whether to sell alcohol to someone or not. Obviously if they are messy, and causing trouble, hopefully security will help the assistant.

So it boils down to making sale or consumption illegal going forward doesn't it? PPs have mentioned all the Government initiatives taken so far. Did anything work?

Graces7

Sounds wrote: »

I don't think it will make much of a difference Grace,
People will still drink, awareness is important and it's good to talk about the issues.
We know what the problem is and how easy it is for someone to slip over the edge.
Recovery from any addiction is hard, it's down to the individual if they can get help.
For many people it's just not that simple, it's there only escape for the realities of life.

I know; I was addicted to wrongly prescribed meds. As you rightly say, only the addict can decide and follow through to get clear. I did it with no outside help anyways.

To get my mind back.

There are addiction clinics in a fair number. But nothing will avail without the will to quit

That sounds harsh but that escape of drink is damaging. as the meds I was on were.

Comes down to choice in the last analysis. and it is that simple.

Titclamp

Not everyone who buys spirits is drinking themselves to death.

Adult responsibility. Self preservation.

punisher5112

Unfortunately each person has different needs, thoughts, addictions etc.....

Of course it's sad that people become addicted to drink, gambling, food, not eating, drugs etc etc....

One thing that is in place and should really be enforced is the right to refuse and in bars if they deem someone to far gone if they have a heart will use this.

Shops should be doing this also but the addict can be extremely crafty and easily get around this by getting others to purchase or just go the black market.

Sure I know of taxi drivers supplying drink on order.

Call or text need a slab... €50 or €60 depending etc...

What is badly needed are places that people need to go to to get help.
Rehab but better as even that rarely works.

If we want change then you need to start going and enforcement of the many laws we already have..... Amount of under age drinking is huge and I can see it getting over taken with drugs if it hasn't already.

MSVforever

The problem in this country is that everything evolves around alcohol.
Getting p#ssed every weekend seems to be the highlight of the week for a lot of folks.
While I was enjoying a similar lifestyle for a couple of years I realised that this can't be it.

Becoming a parent was the main reason for quitting drinking alcohol. Firstly we needed to save money and secondly I wanted to be 100% present all the time when my child was born.
I was at plenty of communion celebrations and while this should have been a special day for the child it was all about adults getting wasted and kids being bored.

I have also learned that people can't accept when you made a conscious decision not do drink alcohol. You must be a recovering alcoholic etc...... How can you have fun without drinking etc?

I am not a hypocrite saying don't drink alcohol but don't judge other people who don't drink for various reasons.

I live a very fulfilled live and enjoy all the time with my family and friends.
I was also able to take up a new hobby which I couldn't afford before I quit drinking.
Motorcycling.

You can’t make everything illegal just because some people can’t be responsible.

I worked in finance at one point. Sometimes customers would apply for a credit card. 2 days later they’d call back looking for a limit increase. They’d gambled a few grand in one day and lost it all. Was I wrong for giving them a credit card? Of course not. This happened frequently unfortunately.

I got into finance because I wanted to help people with their finances. I left the industry promptly as I was sick of people screaming at me for their own poor financial choices.

You can become addicted to anything if you have no self control.

Wanderer78

[Deleted User] wrote: »

You can’t make everything illegal just because some people can’t be responsible.

I worked in finance at one point. Sometimes customers would apply for a credit card. 2 days later they’d call back looking for a limit increase. They’d gambled a few grand in one day and lost it all. Was I wrong for giving them a credit card? Of course not. This happened frequently unfortunately.

I got into finance because I wanted to help people with their finances. I left the industry promptly as I was sick of people screaming at me for their own poor financial choices.

You can become addicted to anything if you have no self control.

Addiction is highly complex, shaming addicts is not a particularly good way of approaching the problem

MSVforever

MSVforever wrote: »

The problem in this country is that everything evolves around alcohol.
Getting p#ssed every weekend seems to be the highlight of the week for a lot of folks.
While I was enjoying a similar lifestyle for a couple of years I realised that this can't be it.

Becoming a parent was the main reason for quitting drinking alcohol. Firstly we needed to save money and secondly I wanted to be 100% present all the time when my child was born.
I was at plenty of communion celebrations and while this should have been a special day for the child it was all about adults getting wasted and kids being bored.

I have also learned that people can't accept when you made a conscious decision not do drink alcohol. You must be a recovering alcoholic etc...... How can you have fun without drinking etc?

I am not a hypocrite saying don't drink alcohol but don't judge other people who don't drink for various reasons.

I live a very fulfilled live and enjoy all the time with my family and friends.
I was also able to take up a new hobby which I couldn't afford before I quit drinking.
Motorcycling.

Good post. Fair play on the motorcycling and been a family man.

I’m in a similar position. Used to drink every weekend. Eventually got a bit sick of it. Started saving and improving my life.

Still enjoy the odd session every couple of months. It can be fun once in awhile.

Foweva Awone

I'm an alcoholic in recovery and I have every sympathy for you, it's really difficult seeing those you love suffer like this.

In my opinion though, it's not about the substance. An alcoholic without access to drink will - unless they treat the underlying issues - instead fill that hole with drugs, self-harm, disordered eating, gambling, you name it.

Unfortunately removing the substance will, on its own, not make much difference.

I live right next to an off-licence and pub, and I barely even notice it when I pass it. And I was as hardcore an alcoholic as you can get. But I've done a lot of work on myself and that's why alcohol just doesn't appeal to me any more - I've worked through all the deep trauma that I had been using alcohol to suppress.

Murt10

Price really does effect alcohol consumption.

After they introduced minimum pricing in Scotland, the sale of alcohol plummeted (see BBC video below). Minimum pricing is not designed to nor is it going to effect normal people, drinking normal amounts.

The price of their drinks will remain unchanged. The aim of minimum pricing is to reduce to consumption of the really cheap, high alcohol, drink favored by alcoholics and many young people (potential alcoholics).

There were plans in the last government term to introduce minimum prices both here and in N Ireland at the same time. I really hope that we go ahead with it here. Whether N Ireland goes down the same route is up to them, and the alcohol industry will try every trick in the book to frustrate it's introduction here, but while it may have an adverse effect on those living close to the border, I can't see too many people hopping into the car to drive 20 miles each way to buy cut price alcohol on a whim.

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-48675313

Strumms

If an alcoholic wants alcohol they will get it, there is nothing a shop manager or employee can do.

If I go into my local Tesco every day this week and buy a litre of vodka and a few cans by Friday the manager says... look dude, you are killing yourself, i and Tesco won’t be responsible , you are finished shopping here...I’m thinking...

Monday... Centra

Tuesday... pub off license

Wednesday... Suervalu off license

Thursday...pub #2 off license

Friday... Dunnes off license

Saturday... Centra#2 off license

Sunday... Molloy’s Off licenses