Lonely

KathleenGrant

I am very sociable and I love talking to people who are family/at work/ on committees etc.
I am working 2 jobs to pay rent/ college fees etc. so my free time was little enough for last while. For last 3 months I have had to share caring role for an elderly relative which means I do 2 days and 5 nights.My weekends are gone and my nights free from work. Any time off I have I need to sleep. It looks like this committment will continue for at least the next 3 months. I am happy to do my bit to care for this person but feel stressed and lonely.


I just realised I didn't really ask a question. Sorry.

punisher5112

Tough situation but fair play for helping as I'm sure you would like the same if needed.

Obviously if it gets too much reach out for help and there are many institutions and charities that could help if needs be.

Strumms

Would it be possible to have a care package approved for your relatives ? Could be as many or as little hours as you need... no point in overdoing things and compromising your own health where you wont be of use to anyone yourself included... go visit your GP, tell them what you've told us and enquire about obtaining some help for you and them...

Sureitlbegrand

Wow that sounds really tough you should be so proud of yourself. I hope your situation improves so you can have some goodness in your life. All you can do is try your best and hope for a break. Things will get better they always do. Keep the chin up and be proud 🙂

Wayne Jarvis

I'm very sorry to read this Kathleen. I have always been a fan of you and your posts. I think you are very funny and sound.

I am trying to be delicate with this question and statement, When you say lonely do you mean for a relationship to have someone to come home to or just more of a bit of fun as a stress reliever? There are dating apps for those and you seem confident enough to use them, I think you have before in fact if my memory is correct.

Or do you have time to meet up with friends for coffee and chats? They can be great in times of stress to help get things off your mind.

Or could you maybe squeeze in something like a Saturday morning fitness class/jogging etc..? Something to again release stress and maybe get you out of any routine you might be in? If that is possible.

Again I'm sorry to hear about your stress and I wish you the best of luck with it Kathleen.

KathleenGrant

Guy Person wrote: »

I'm very sorry to read this Kathleen. I have always been a fan of you and your posts. I think you are very funny and sound.

I am trying to be delicate with this question and statement, When you say lonely do you mean for a relationship to have someone to come home to or just more of a bit of fun as a stress reliever? There are dating apps for those and you seem confident enough to use them, I think you have before in fact if my memory is correct.

Or do you have time to meet up with friends for coffee and chats? They can be great in times of stress to help get things off your mind.

Or could you maybe squeeze in something like a Saturday morning fitness class/jogging etc..? Something to again release stress and maybe get you out of any routine you might be in? If that is possible.

Again I'm sorry to hear about your stress and I wish you the best of luck with it Kathleen.

Thank you for your kind words. I am not lonely for a relationship at all. I have just finished a relationship and the end saddened me. If another one happens it won't for quite a while. I don't have that many friends but I could meet up with someone now and again. I suppose I just feel isolated or something. And mourning the relationship even though I ended it. I think the idea of a jogging class or dancing or something would help. Exercise helps.

cannotlogin

Have to agree with Guy Person in that your posts are great and you have a great sense of humour.

It does seem like a lot of your time is accounted for but could you pick even two or three hours a week that are just for you. Same three hours and build it into your routine like everything else so that you can make plans for you during this time - whether it's a class, coffee with someone or some hampering, but it's your time. Don't feel bad for looking after yourself too - you do a lot for others so it's not selfish.

KathleenGrant

Thank you for the people who commented. I spoke to the gp and the district nurse and they were a bit concerned. They have organised for my mother to go to respite for 2 weeks to give myself and the other care giver a break. They have organised for us to apply for a care package as they feel it is necessary considering her needs and our work commitments. The doctor is a little concerned about me and suggested I take a week's sick leave next week and use that time to rest but also to plan a break in the week for myself going forward. He also gave me words and sentences I should use when speaking to other family members about getting a break every week for myself and my brother.

I am really grateful to you all for your comments and suggestions.