weird thing happened in a club last night

Snorlaxx

Hey All , Long story Short:

Dated a girl for 5 years, we broke up 6 years ago(bad break up, we now cant stand each other), we're both mid 30's now.

She was always a loner but since we broke up she has stuck around my friends i.e. I was out with them all Stephens night and she was there, but none of her own friends, however that's not the issue.

I was in a club last night and she had a night out with work colleagues, I didn't know she was going to be in the same place.

One of her work colleagues came over to me and said "Welllll, how are you(I said grand, your looking well), we are all here and were out with <insert x GF name here> in case you want to come say Hi"

I just said no thanks and that was the end of that, it took me a few secs to even guess who the work colleague was cos I havent seen her in about 6 years and she's changed her appearance.

Am I over analysing this or is it just weird?????

Discuss :-)

The chan chan man

Huh?!

Seamai

Snorlaxx wrote: »

Hey All , Long story Short:

Dated a girl for 5 years, we broke up 6 years ago(bad break up, we now cant stand each other), we're both mid 30's now.

She was always a loner but since we broke up she has stuck around my friends i.e. I was out with them all Stephens night and she was there, but none of her own friends, however that's not the issue.

I was in a club last night and she had a night out with work colleagues, I didn't know she was going to be in the same place.

One of her work colleagues came over to me and said "Welllll, how are you(I said grand, your looking well), we are all here and were out with <insert x GF name here> in case you want to come say Hi"

I just said no thanks and that was the end of that, it took me a few secs to even guess who she was cos I havens seen her in about 6 years and she's changed her appearance.

Am I over analysing this or is it just weird?????

Discuss :-)

Is it the ex or her work colleague has changed her appearance?

4Ad

Thats so weird..Wow !!

HeidiHeidi

So you haven't seen her since you broke up 6 years ago, but she was out with you and your friends (but not hers) on Stephen's night, but you wouldn't have recognised her last night?

I'm confused tbh.....

pinkyeye

You're over analysing it. :rolleyes::rolleyes:

BlondeLou

HeidiHeidi wrote: »

So you haven't seen her since you broke up 6 years ago, but she was out with you and your friends (but not hers) on Stephen's night, but you wouldn't have recognised her last night?

I'm confused tbh.....

I’m guessing he means the colleague..

Teyla Emmagan

That's not remotely weird.

punisher5112

Stop going out.....

That or change friends

Mongfinder General

Well, if she's mid thirties like you she's probably seen most of her friends settle down and get knocked up during the period since you both broke up. She therefore has no party friends and is probably hunting for a mate so that she can settle down and have kids.

I'd stay out if the way and let her do her thing.

Snorlaxx

Seamai wrote: »

Is it the ex or her work colleague has changed her appearance?

Work colleague

Snorlaxx

We prob see each other five times a year at birthdays etc.
I suppose its wierd cos it was a real bad break up and cos her work place is so small, her work colleagues automatically hated me after it.

So why after this long when they know we dislike each other would they tap me on the shoulder and make a point of saying shes out with them.

Again, I'm prob over analysing

Snorlaxx

punisher5112 wrote: »

Stop going out.....

That or change friends

I prob should clarify, when I say friends these are lads I was in primary/secondary etc with and past work mates. So why would I change friends?

bitofabind

They probably said that because they know you know each other? What else did you think they could possibly mean? Do you still have feelings for your ex?

Snorlaxx

bitofabind wrote: »

They probably said that because they know you know each other? What else did you think they could possibly mean? Do you still have feelings for your ex?

At a high level I think its because I cant decide if they were taking the mick or actually been sincere. I know their a tight nit group so it could be either. Last time a few years ago I was in the same bar as them and I got ate for "following them"

Deeper Blue

I’m assuming OP that you still have feelings for your ex and hence you’re trying to assess whether she wants to get back together?

Otherwise I can’t see what the issue is or why you’d be thinking so much about it

Lily_Aldrin7

I’d say just the colleague was making a conversation, I don’t think the x made her come and say this to you. If this got into your head so much I’d say you’re hoping she wants you back

Faith

CMod note: I have deleted some posts that were below the standard expected in PI.

racso1975

Maybe work friend was being a wagon and wanted to stir it by inviting you over. Maybe your ex harps on about you and still has feelings. Either way we'll never know cause ya didn't go over... And that was the perfectly correct decision to make.

Snorlaxx

racso1975 wrote: »

Maybe work friend was being a wagon and wanted to stir it by inviting you over. Maybe your ex harps on about you and still has feelings. Either way we'll never know cause ya didn't go over... And that was the perfectly correct decision to make.

My thoughts exactly

Snorlaxx

NDWC wrote: »

I’m assuming OP that you still have feelings for your ex and hence you’re trying to assess whether she wants

No, no feelings at all. It was trying to understand their motive for telling me she was out in the first place when we dont talk

Gerianam

Snorlaxx wrote: »

We prob see each other five times a year at birthdays etc.
I suppose its wierd cos it was a real bad break up and cos her work place is so small, her work colleagues automatically hated me after it.

So why after this long when they know we dislike each other would they tap me on the shoulder and make a point of saying shes out with them.

Again, I'm prob over analysing

It is Christmas, season of good will and all that...You are over-thinking this...

Deeper Blue

Snorlaxx wrote: »

No, no feelings at all. It was trying to understand their motive for telling me she was out in the first place when we dont talk

In that case my advice would be to forget about this. You are 100% overanalysing. Who cares what their motives were? I wouldn't waste another second thinking about it.

lainey_d_123

Not remotely weird. Woman you once knew recognised you, said hello (as is polite) and mentioned she was out with your ex, which is how she knew you in the first place. Told you to come over and say hi (again polite social convention) and you declined.

There's literally no story here.

banoffe2

Hi OP
I think this situation is just a normal approach after a few drinks and the time of year thats in it from a friend, work colleague or acquaintance. No point in wasting time or energy trying to analyse or figure out the motive, the important thing to be responsible for is our own behaviour and decisions. It was good that you and the colleague were civil with each other. If you had a bad break up it sounds like a chapter you don't want to re open. Best of luck for 2020

ILoveYourVibes

Do you think she tells them you are still together?

I was just thinking if you broke up 6 yrs ago why they know who you are?

The_Honeybadger

The only thing I find weird is that she was out with your friends on Stephens night? Is this wholly a group of lads? How did that come about, or is she friendly with some of their WAG’s?

Snorlaxx

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Do you think she tells them you are still together?
I was just thinking if you broke up 6 yrs ago why they know who you are?

This had crossed my mind yes.

When we were together we did go on some of her work nights which included bring a partner, so I would have known them through that format.

Snorlaxx

The_Honeybadger wrote: »

The only thing I find weird is that she was out with your friends on Stephens night? Is this wholly a group of lads? How did that come about, or is she friendly with some of their WAG’s?

This was a whole group of lads apart from one girl(married to one of the lads).
This girl however would be very gullible and is easy to lead on.

When we broke up my ex bought her a €400 Gucci handbag and a watch so they immediately became friends, hence I will see my ex when the wife is out.

We were also both made god parents to their second last child two years ago, which you can imagine was a very awkward situation.