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How to forget somebody

  • 13-10-2019 6:16pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Going unreg for this.

    3 years ago, I met a guy at work. Both not long out of relationships and neither were looking for anything. I'm a few years older than he (both 30's). We became friends and long story short, started sleeping together. He transferred to his home county after getting a promotion. Since then, we spend one in five or six weekends together.

    We meet up go to gigs or restaurants and have a great time. People always say we seem like a lovely couple. We split bills, he's always affectionate and we just get on. He is on instagram and I'm sure there is no girlfriend but I don't like the thoughts of him being with other girls. We never talk about that.

    Recently I have started to want more. We last met last week. After one glass of red too many, I commented how people always assume we are a couple. I'm not sure if he didn't hear me or intentionally choose to ignore what I said and spoke about something completely different. I didn't bring it up again.

    So I know if a guy is interested, he will chase and make his intentions clear, it's obvious he doesn't want a relationship with me. I have decided to not meet up anymore for my own sake. Problem is, I live in very rural Ireland where there are no classes, college etc. within a big radius. I don't have a big social circle and I know by stopping contact, I'm going to really miss him. I don't have anybody to talk me out of contacting him when I'm feeling lonely.

    Best way to forget somebody??


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 217 ✭✭Skibunny77


    Don't try to forget him.
    Consciously remind yourself of what you want (a relationship where you feel loved and valued) and remind yourself of all the reasons why you are walking away from this. Yes it will be hard and lonely and tough at times, but it is better than feeling as you do now - that essentially you're good for fun, but not for commitment from this guy. You've tried that, it doesn't make you feel good about yourself and you're walking away. Having the self respect and esteem to do that should make you feel good about yourself, you will get through the hard parts.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,223 ✭✭✭✭Dial Hard


    Or you could have an open an honest conversation about what you want and see where that gets you?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Skibunny that's great advice and a post I think I'll be reading over and over again for the next while.

    Dial hard, I did try recently but as I said I don't know if he didn't hear or didn't want to hear. After 3 years, I think he would have said if he wanted anything more.

    It's best I try move on, I know I will find it very hard in time when I'm not seeing him.


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