It's that magical time of year again...

B0jangles

A truly marvellous season - the mornings are crisp but the evenings are still warm, fruit is ripening on the trees, and best of all, the kids are going back to school.

Oh and giant spiders appear on every bedroom wall to strike horror and panic into all.

Met my first of the year last night. I was sitting up reading in bed when I vaguely noticed a movement over by the open window. I glanced over and saw a horribly, HORRIBLY large, black and leggy spider sidling slowly down the wall.

I am not exaggerating about the size - I had to nudge its legs to get it small enough to fit the mouth of a pint glass over it, and it wasn't hugely splayed out at the time. I carried it downstairs to put it on the back hall, as far away from me as possible and just the feeling of it patting on the walls of the glass were nearly enough to set me flapping and squealing like a demented chicken.

I know they are harmless, I know they do a lot of good by keeping the fly population down, I tell myself these things over and over again but my dumb monkey hindbrain doesn't care, it just wants to flee very very quickly while howling in total panic.

Please giant spiders, please leave me alone

jimbobaloobob

I found one hitching a lift on the boot of my car the other day it's a wolf spider from comparing it to the ones online. I swear he's got a grappling hook and ropes and all the climbing gear with him. Has spun a huge web across the spare tyre I don't open the boot now because I don't want to ruin his work. I'd share a pic but not sure it would be appreciated.

honeybear

Having slept in an attic of an old house for years, I’m completely at peace with spiders ... my little nieces have awful fears of them though so Auntie is on dispatch duty a lot

whisky_galore

It's a bloody spider. In this country it won't kill you.

Same with other irrational fears, like why lose your shït over a moth? It's harmless.

B0jangles

I've gotten a lot better over the years at dealing with spiders generally - little ones are fine, daddy long-legses are fine, and I think jumping spiders are really cute. But those big autumn spiders are like a perfect storm of all the things that set off the old terror -they are so big and their legs are so elbow-y and thick and black, and when they panic they skitter around in the worst possible way.

One time my brother was lying in bed half-asleep and right in front of his face, so close it was out of focus, one of them wriggled out from under his pillow. I am extremely glad that didn't happen to me, I think I'd had dropped dead there and then just to get away from it :P

McMurphy

Size of this monster I snapped last night in the bathroom, he crawled out and scared the bejaysis out of me.

**Warning potentially NSFW**

Stevieluvsye

whisky_galore wrote: »

It's a bloody spider. In this country it won't kill you.

Same with other irrational fears, like why lose your shït over a moth? It's harmless.

The devils work

Flibble

I live in a house that they LOVE. I keep lunch boxes in every room to trap them as glasses just don't work. There was a day last year that I caught 8 in one day in my kitchen...

This year I'm minding a ferocious indoor cat and already there's been a couple of mornings I've gotten up to find legs and dismembered torsos scattered across the floor. I'm feeling a little more optimistic about the spider season this year

(Cos if I kill them it's murder... If the cat does, it's nature)

Bobblehats

I love it; best time of year the weather forecasters can save the apologies they should stock up on sunny d if they’re that f*cking needy. Only 10 more weeks til the big one

holy guacamole

If you don't want spiders in your home get some conkers and place them on the window sills and in the corners of the rooms. Spiders smell with their feet and they detest the scent of conkers.

Started doing this a few years ago and haven't seen a spider since.

Call it nonsense if you like, I'll be too busy living in a spider-free environment to care.

Bobblehats

holy guacamole wrote: »

Spiders smell with their feet and they detest the scent of conkers

Whilst they’re busy hearing with the hairs. Weird bastards are just short of seeing with their toes

fineso.mom

holy guacamole wrote: »

If you don't want spiders in your home get some conkers and place them on the window sills and in the corners of the rooms. Spiders smell with their feet and they detest the scent of conkers.

Started doing this a few years ago and haven't seen a spider since.

Call it nonsense if you like, I'll be too busy living in a spider-free environment to care.

Is it just the chestnut part or the spikey outside as well?

fineso.mom

Johnny Dogs wrote: »

Size of this monster I snapped last night in the bathroom, he crawled out and scared the bejaysis out of me.

**Warning potentially NSFW**

Took me a second to see it. Very impressive.

holy guacamole

fineso.mom wrote: »

Is it just the chestnut part or the spikey outside as well?

Just the chestnut.

You don't even need to change them, just get one batch and they'll last you till this time next year.

B0jangles

What if you're also afraid of conkers?

Deebles McBeebles

Just be careful when you get the conkers that a conker spider hasn't stowed away in them.

Stevieluvsye

Deebles McBeebles wrote: »

Just be careful when you get the conkers that a conker spider hasn't stowed away in them.

Googled that thinking you were sincere

Graces7

B0jangles wrote: »

A truly marvellous season - the mornings are crisp but the evenings are still warm, fruit is ripening on the trees, and best of all, the kids are going back to school.

Oh and giant spiders appear on every bedroom wall to strike horror and panic into all.

Met my first of the year last night. I was sitting up reading in bed when I vaguely noticed a movement over by the open window. I glanced over and saw a horribly, HORRIBLY large, black and leggy spider sidling slowly down the wall.

I am not exaggerating about the size - I had to nudge its legs to get it small enough to fit the mouth of a pint glass over it, and it wasn't hugely splayed out at the time. I carried it downstairs to put it on the back hall, as far away from me as possible and just the feeling of it patting on the walls of the glass were nearly enough to set me flapping and squealing like a demented chicken.

I know they are harmless, I know they do a lot of good by keeping the fly population down, I tell myself these things over and over again but my dumb monkey hindbrain doesn't care, it just wants to flee very very quickly while howling in total panic.

Please giant spiders, please leave me alone

I feel sick! gulp.... one thing I am very glad of in this unit is that there have been few spiders... and that my cats love chasing and.... eating... them.. Now I feel really really sick :eek:

Graces7

Johnny Dogs wrote: »

Size of this monster I snapped last night in the bathroom, he crawled out and scared the bejaysis out of me.

**Warning potentially NSFW**

THANK YOU for hiding the photo!

Raconteuse

Every year when this comes up, I never see spiders.

Or seagulls when it's all about them.

Feisar

Johnny Dogs wrote: »

Size of this monster I snapped last night in the bathroom, he crawled out and scared the bejaysis out of me.

**Warning potentially NSFW**

A truly gargantuan beast!

Feisar

B0jangles wrote: »

What if you're also afraid of conkers?

You seen that vid on a certain site involving chestnuts in their spiky shell, a catapult and a Japanese lady; didn't you?

Badly Drunk Boy

Raconteuse wrote: »

Every year when this comes up, I never see spiders.

Or seagulls when it's all about them.

Then you are the spider (or seagull)!! :eek:

Franz Von Peppercorn II

Spiders are alright. They catch flies. Flies are b@stards.

Feisar

Franz Von Peppercorn II wrote: »

Spiders are alright. They catch flies. Flies are b@stards.

Agreed and I'm not going to argue that spiders catch flies however I wonder do they dint the fly population by much?

TheValeyard

Graces7

Bobblehats wrote: »

I love it; best time of year the weather forecasters can save the apologies they should stock up on sunny d if they’re that f*cking needy. Only 10 more weeks til the big one

what big one please? ?

Franz Von Peppercorn II

Feisar wrote: »

Agreed and I'm not going to argue that spiders catch flies however I wonder do they dint the fly population by much?

A fair amount

https://www.livescience.com/58271-spiders-eat-880-tons-of-insects-yearly.html


They eat more bugs than we eat food.