What Serviing of unsavoury restaurants / takeaways should really be Namedd

Inspired from thread about dodgy restaurants takeaways

For drinks, I'm thinking along the lines of

"Flat Cola" sold with the line "The fizz was never there in the first place"

"Suckit-UP" - "Can't tell whether its Sugar free or original? Neither can we"

BANG BANG coffee - The noise of the the cannister being banged in the best thing about this coffee.

Chips OR Rice:

Get a tin of mostly cooking oil, with some chips / grains of rice swimming about. Mind your fingers the oil may be hot

Captain Red Beard

What?

Ubbquittious

Frankly dishonest coffee

alta stare

Captain Red Beard wrote: »

What?

Yep. Exactly what i just said aloud after reading the op.

TheValeyard

Red Bull: you're probably going to get diabetes anyway, let's speed up the process.

AlphabetCards

Green tea: Here, enjoy a strong homeopathic herbal remedy

Captain Red Beard

Captain Red Beard wrote: »

What?

I'm think the OP is asking people to rename a product or give them an amusing tagline, if you deem them to be poor quality.


Still doesn't explain the chips or rice thing, or fingers in the oil reference. Daytime drinking, maybe.

TheValeyard

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Daytime drinking, maybe.

Hey! Daytime drinking on your holidays when everyone else is running around in the rat race is very relaxing!

RMAOK

Bad grammar/spelling is everyone's enemy.....

Deebles McBeebles

Kale: Enjoy the taste of earth, sucker.

Potato: Don't be a bitch.

whisky_galore

Boards Pidgin English service is now online.

****it Takit or Leave it Crepe:

served cold with a single thing strandvof napkin in wilted floppy tired form as the girl who hands it to you says
NEXT!!..

Church on Tuesday

Kentucky Fried Crap.

Written on the chalkboard: Special Custard Pie.

The "customer" orders and pays for it.

Then has the custard pie thrown in their face. Their nose is actually rubbed in it.

Used to be a device in black and white comedies.

Seems to have become extinct nowadays, millennials have such a poor sense of humour.

PinotNero

Fanta = Nazi cola.

For Forks Sake

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Kentucky Fried Crap.

Your Face

all your base are belong to us

the beer revolu

Pananni.
**** bread, squashed flat.