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One partner abroad

  • 07-08-2019 10:51am
    #1
    sc9736
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭


    Hi all

    need some advice please - I've decided to separate from my husband. (We tried for the past 3 years and this was my decision. I moved abroad recently for work and will not be moving back to Ireland.

    It was agreed that before I took the job, the kids would stay in Irish school and we decide on what to do after Xmas. Now thats all changed.

    I want my daughter (8)to go to school over here (UK) next year. My son is starting in secondary so not sure if he will want to come over next year but will be more than happy to have him over with me or will spend summers etc over there.

    In the meantime, i will be travelling back most weekends.

    I am happy not to sell the family home until after the kids are 18 but want to buy my own house over here in the next few months. Both of us are doing ok financial wise but I will need to get a deposit

    What are my rights / options. I'm trying to sort this amicablly but he has already not agreed for them to come over for holidays this month.

    My parents / family are destroying me saying I have abandoned them etc but this move has been a long time coming on my part.

    Whats 1st option - mediation? whats costs involved with this?

    TIA


Comments

  • #2
    Xterminator
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,792 ✭✭✭Xterminator


    Hi Op

    mediation is good, i would say its worth a shot because if it doesn't work you end up going down the legal route anyway, and its worth a try.
    The independent mediator can make different parties think about their own positions. It is also free

    https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/birth_family_relationships/separation_and_divorce/family_mediation_service.html

    for instance your husbands reticence to let them holiday with you is the kind of thing a mediator may be able to intercede in.

    i have to ask, do you honestly think uprooting your daughter from school and friends and removing from father and brother and possibly extended family too is is her best interest? I personally believe the child interests should be the primary concern, and this perspective can be sometimes lost in the emotional fallout of breaking up.


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