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Think I need to get out - where to start?

  • 06-08-2019 9:08am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I've been with my husband for almost a decade, married for around half that and we have two young children. Things were great before our children were born, but it's been steadily getting worse since our first child was born. It's all about him - he puts his own needs and wants above just above everything else, including the kids. He has been sexually coercive towards me and he is manipulative, I feel like I'm in a bit of a prison with him sometimes. I am at a point now where I need to get out, but have no idea where to start. I'm drained and feeling incredibly low and I cannot go on like this.


Comments

  • #2
    hawley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,322 ✭✭✭hawley


    MamaShark wrote: »
    I've been with my husband for almost a decade, married for around half that and we have two young children. Things were great before our children were born, but it's been steadily getting worse since our first child was born. It's all about him - he puts his own needs and wants above just above everything else, including the kids. He has been sexually coercive towards me and he is manipulative, I feel like I'm in a bit of a prison with him sometimes. I am at a point now where I need to get out, but have no idea where to start. I'm drained and feeling incredibly low and I cannot go on like this.

    Sorry to hear that MamaShark. Have you considered going to Women's Aid or the Rape Crisis Centre. If he is sexually abusing you, then you need to get out of there as quickly and as safely as possible.


  • #3
    Xterminator
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,782 ✭✭✭Xterminator


    hi mamashark.

    here is a website that lists steps to take in preparation,

    https://esme.com/resources/domestic-violence/leaving-an-abusive-relationship, the links are not irish ones, but the steps are practical ones.

    here is the irish information page with links to irish organisation that can help, not sure their plan is as good!

    http://www.cosc.ie/en/COSC/Pages/WP09000002

    look after yourself and your children & be safe.


  • #4
    Honeydew3456
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 107 ✭✭Honeydew3456


    Hi mamashark,

    Great links above, I feel for you.

    It's so horrible to be put in that position where you are left with no other option but to leave. Been there done that. It's sad when you walk down the aisle expecting one life with the person you love and they deliver you the opposite.

    I have no other practical advice to give but want to wish you all the very best of luck and I remember once the dust settled, I felt like I had walked from the darkness into the light and found myself again. No doubt this will happen for you too.

    Remember to try to take care of yourself, sleep and diet so important through all this as you will need to be mentally strong for the manipulation coming your way.

    Somedays you will wonder should you, but if you feel like you are in prison now, through no fault of your own, you definitely should.


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