This is the end..my lonely friend, the end

Porklife

Hey Guys,

So, I've finally decided to hop off the merry-go-round because as we all know, it's not as much fun as it sounds. Without going into too much detail,I know my time has come to take my sobriety seriously. I've had way too many rock bottom moments or at least moments that should have been rock bottom (losing relationships, quitting jobs so I could continue the session, waking up in random places including outside). the most frightening part to date is that nothing that has happened thus far has been enough to make me stop. I come from a broken home with alcoholic parents so didn't have the easiest time of things but no more excuses. My drinking has reached crazy heights and it needs to stop. I don't even enjoy it anymore. I feel ashamed, guilty, anxious and unhappy when I drink. My hangovers are terrifying too, I'm talking night terrors, sweating, anxiety, can't sit still, deep fear of death, itchy skin, the works.

I'm now on day 9 of sobriety and I feel really good. I'm sleeping better, feeling way more focused at work, I'm calmer and happier all round but I'm worried how I'm going to sustain this. I've been to AA in the past but it wasn't for me (one of the members followed me after a meeting and hit on me and it really scared me). I know you don't have to be religious and I think the ethos and 12 steps and mantra are very wise but it's just not for me.

I guess I'm just posting here for some support cos this is a really tough path to go down and I respect each and every one of you who have managed to achieve it.

Thanks for reading.

A Summer In Provence

Porklife, I want to wish you well as you start your alcohol free journey.

I stopped drinking almost a year ago and it has brought about some very positive changes to my life. I didn’t have a serious drink problem but I did have crippling anxiety and panic attacks and drink wasn’t helping. A few glasses of wine would take the edge off things temporarily but I would always feel 100 times worse the following day.

I started by changing my diet and I soon realized there was no point in eating healthy food if I was going to continue drinking. I still suffer from anxiety occasionally but its well managed. My personal and professional life has gone from strength to strength too. The best thing is not waking up at the weekend with the dreaded fear and a hangover. I enjoy my weekends far more now as they’re way more productive. You might was to check out The 28 Day Alcohol Free Challenge book, the lads also have a FB support group/podcast called One Year No Beer.

Best of Luck to you!!

runningbuddy

Well done to you Pork. Keep it going x

Porklife

Thank you lads. I'm now on day 14 and it's the longest I've gone since I started drinking. I feel great and I've already seen many positive changes. I've always been into fitness but I'm usually too hungover to do anything but last week I joined a kickboxing club and have been going every day. I think it's vital to fill the void and keep busy. I've stopped romanticizing booze too, there's
nothing sweet or romantic about it. One thing I've noticed is that my sweet tooth is through the roof. I'm constantly craving sugar. Maybe it's because my body is used to getting loads of sugar from wine and now it's like...heyyyy what gives?! Where's me sugar?!! I'm seriously eating boxes of biscuits and tubs of ice cream. I'm hoping that calms down but regardless, it's better than downing two bottles of wine a night!
Thanks again for the support

A Summer In Provence

The lads that do the One Year No Beer podcast cover things like sugar cravings and improving the diet. It’s early days, don’t be beating yourself up.

When you make small (gradual) changes to your diet combined with some daily excercise you’ll be amazed at how quickly your body changes when you’re off the booze too.

I don’t miss booze these days and I never ever thought that would happen. I’m completely addicted to feeling well and I love having energy. For me eating “clean” unprocessed food and daily exercise is critical. Another major plus is the money you save, I treated myself to a brand new car, something I wouldn’t have been able to afford if I was still drinking.

You’re on the right road, you’re doing great Porklife - keep going.

Porklife

Thanks a million, I'll check those lads out. 28 days would have seemed so daunting to me a mere 2 weeks ago but now I've the confidence to do it. It's crazy what a difference no alcohol makes to your entire outlook on life. I feel so much more positive and hopeful about everything. I've loads of energy and can't wait to go to my fitness class later. That said, it can also change very quickly. Over the weekend I was getting sporadic but intense cravings. The voice in my head telling me to go to the pub/off licence was torture, it was literally giving me a headache.
I had pangs in my tummy and waves of dizzyness from the urge to drink. That just goes to show you how powerful and evil alcohol is. I also keep getting these thoughts of 'ah **** it, who am I kidding, my dad was a drinker, my family are all drinkers, I'm just a boozehound, might as well embrace it'. Then I shake myself out of it. I never used to be a big drinker. In fact, I was always health conscience and into fitness.
A few tragic events happened and I turned to alcohol and it just spiraled. It's so insidious, like a snake. It lays low in the grass for a long time and only occasionally trips you up so you think it's your friend, right there by your side when you need it then BAM! When you're guard is down it slides right up and ****in chokes you!! I almost hate it now in a way but I know that won't last. I guess moreso, what I hate is the power it has over me. I hate that it keeps winning the battle in my head. This time though I'm tenacious and I'm armed with a network of support, good reading material, a better knowledge of my addiction and a damn good attitude to turning the tables once and for all!

Absolute best of luck to anybody else fighting the good fight. Respect to to all, it is far form easy but it's worth the fight x

A Summer In Provence

Porklife, Try not to put yourself under too much pressure. One thing that I found very helpful was not announcing to family and friends that I had given up drink.

I did the 28 Alcohol Free Challenge to see if I could stay alcohol free for that time. When that was completed I said I’d do another 28 days, then three months, six months.....it’s coming up to a year now.

I can’t begin to tell you the amount of satisfaction I got from all the first “alcohol free” events that I crossed off my list. First night out with family/ friends, Birthday, Summer BBQ, Christmas, Weddings & work night. I was particularly dreading Christmas and the weddings but there are so many non alcoholic drinks out there now, it was actually grand.

One very big positive was being able to go work nights out. For years I completely avoided them out of fear I would say or do something that would damage my career. I was always lucky that it took a lot to get drunk, I was never messy or aggressive but on the occasions that I did get drunk I had a very embarrassing habit of declaring my luv for people I wasn’t in love with. This created problems with one very dear friend :o:o

I was promoted at work recently and I don’t believe that would have happened over a year ago. Being alcohol free, fit and healthy has helped my focus, attention span, problem solving - I feel significantly fitter - physically and mentally.

In my day to day life I wouldn’t be actively encouraging people to give up drink because I thoroughly enjoyed being a drinker for years - However, if you have stopped enjoying it and it’s no longer fun or you’re prone to anxiety, panic attacks or depression it worth giving the 28 day challenge a go and if that helps, keep setting targets until you’ve hopefully convinced yourself that your life has been greatly enhanced by being a non drinker.

Porklife

Well done Summer, that’s absolutely brilliant and your achievement is an inspiration. I know what you mean about work nights out and worrying you’ll do something stupid. I’m the same in that I have a large capacity for booze and can put it away without getting messy.. to a certain point obviously and then I’m a train wreck but I’d be good at keeping it together at events. My trouble was that once the event ended, most people go home to bed but I’d always have a ‘night cap’. I’d put on sad music and get all melancholy and morose. I used to be a lot of fun drinking and to some extent I still am but I can tip over into sadness very easily.
My hangovers are where the real problem is though. They’re just a f*cking nightmare!! I always end up having a cure (or 6). I’m just so sick of feeling guilty, ashamed, low, anxious, pointless, hopeless etc. It’s not normal and it’s also not real. If I don’t drink for even a couple of days I’m bright, happy, positive and a smiley person but throw a few pints into me and I’m crying to Fix You by Coldplay… and the worst part is I’m not even a fan!!!!! 

I stopped drinking over a year ago and it's still a bit ****. :P
I didn't beat myself up over the diet and despite it being worse I put on no weight. Once I'd gotten kinda set I addressed the diet and weight is coming off really easily now.

Porklife

How do you guys feel about non alcoholic beers? I'm a bit torn. I think breaking the habits associated with booze is a wise move but then again, I actually like the taste and ritual of drinking beer (cracking off the lid, pouring it into a glass, watching it settle... ah who am I kidding, I slug straight from the bottle!:pac:)
but I feel like this may be a slippery slope.
One part of me thinks it's genius, you get to drink without drinking in a way but another part of me thinks jaayssuss, just stop with the bloody alcohol and alcohol related items for gods sake!
Yeah... torn for sure about whether to try this route or not.. if you drank, say 5 of them, would you feel okay the next day?

K.Flyer

Porklife wrote: »

How do you guys feel about non alcoholic beers? I'm a bit torn. I think breaking the habits associated with booze is a wise move but then again, I actually like the taste and ritual of drinking beer (cracking off the lid, pouring it into a glass, watching it settle... ah who am I kidding, I slug straight from the bottle!:pac:)
but I feel like this may be a slippery slope.
One part of me thinks it's genius, you get to drink without drinking in a way but another part of me thinks jaayssuss, just stop with the bloody alcohol and alcohol related items for gods sake!
Yeah... torn for sure about whether to try this route or not.. if you drank, say 5 of them, would you feel okay the next day?

Well done and the best of luck.
I gave it up for good over 12 years ago and haven't looked back. I didn't have a "problem" but I recognised that it was a better life choice for me, especially after realising how much I was drinking.
Yes, it takes a while to get used to the idea of "that's it, finished with it", but it gets easier as time goes by and much easier as years go by.
I'm not going to say I haven't nearly been tempted, I have, but I just turn away and distract myself with something else and remind myself of how well I feel by Not Drinking.
I will not even try non-alcohol drinks, just in case the taste creates too strong a temptation for the real thing.
It took a little while to get used to the idea, but now it not a thing anymore.
Don't make it a "thing", if offered a drink, its a simple " no thanks, I'll have a (---) instead please"
If people ask why not, just tell them you just aren't bothered for a drink at the moment and change the subject. Don't allow it to be made into a discussion, especially if it may be one where there is no moral support, where people start slagging or making a big deal about it.
Yes, you can still have a good time, Yes, you will feel better, Yes, you will save yourself a lot of money, Yes, you will be happier in yourself and glad you gave it up.
Best of luck.

Gerry T

Best of luck, great that you decided to do this and you followed through.
For me, I'd leave out the non-alco beers, too risky.
Just drink water, some good flavoured water out there...spoil yourself with a sparkling water...just dont go drinking coke or fanta.
Also you will need to try hard after the yr, if that's your target. Dont say to yourself...sure it's only 1 beer, if you do then your back on it.
Lastly, if you do have a moment of weakness, the next day dont beat yourself up but DO go off it again that moment, dont say, I'll go off it after the weekend. Do it straight away.
Best of luck, we're all cheering you on.

I haven't touched a non-alcoholic beer. I love sparkling water so that was easy for me. Some of the Tesco/Lidl flavoured sparkling waters are lovely (plenty of choice) and cheap. San Pellegrino is fantastic as well.

Other than that there's a lot to work through and it'll be different for everyone. Not lying in on the weekend is a big one for me, I can have a load of stuff done and ticked off before anyone anyone is texting me while they sleep off their hangovers. :P Boredom can be an issue so as silly as it may sound; get a hobby. Whether it's something alone or something in a group setting have something. Learn to enjoy peace and quiet as well. :P

Porklife

Deleted User wrote: »

I haven't touched a non-alcoholic beer. I love sparkling water so that was easy for me. Some of the Tesco/Lidl flavoured sparkling waters are lovely (plenty of choice) and cheap. San Pellegrino is fantastic as well.

Other than that there's a lot to work through and it'll be different for everyone. Not lying in on the weekend is a big one for me, I can have a load of stuff done and ticked off before anyone anyone is texting me while they sleep off their hangovers. :P Boredom can be an issue so as silly as it may sound; get a hobby. Whether it's something alone or something in a group setting have something. Learn to enjoy peace and quiet as well. :P

I've taken up kickboxing and I really like my own company so that's a good start. I'm into dance too and cooking, although I associate cooking and food with booze. One of my favourite things on a Friday night is buying some lovely food, sticking on music, pouring a glass of red and totally relaxing.
Last Friday I struggled with that. Making dinner with a glass of water just wasn't as much fun. I gotta remember though that waking up on Saturday and going for a swim with a clear head and a positive attitude was amazing!!
The feeling I get from being sober, the natural high and sense of self worth is so much better than the fleeting fraudulent feeling of well-being that I get from a glass of wine.
This is hard. One minute I'm determined and feeling absolutely great and the next I'm flooded with waves of what's the point, just give in, no way am I fighting this battle FOREVER.
Gotta take it step by step. Gotta breath. Gotta stop believing that alcohol is the answer. It has tried to kill me so many times, how can I still like it?! If alcohol was a person I'd ****ing hate them by now. i'd unfriend them on facebook immediately

K.Flyer

Porklife wrote: »

This is hard. One minute I'm determined and feeling absolutely great and the next I'm flooded with waves of what's the point, just give in, no way am I fighting this battle FOREVER.
Gotta take it step by step. Gotta breath. Gotta stop believing that alcohol is the answer.

At the Beginning it is hard, but it gets Easier the more you stick with it, like anything in life.
I know plenty of people, including myself, who have gone through exactly the same as you have posted above, they are still off the drink, some are 20 plus years off it.
Keep up the good work.

Porklife

Thank you and I know you're right. Logically it seems like a no brainer, on paper it's as clear as crystal that this is the right path. If this decision or dillema or whatever you want to call it was an illustration, one path would be paved with golddust and covered in rose petals with the sun beaming down upon it and the other would be dark and creepy with danger lurking behind every bend and storm clouds looming overhead. Only a moron would go down the dark path.
It really is one day at a time. This morning I was positive and energetic. Now I feel empty and fragile. Alcohol will not fill that void. That void is inside me when I drink too, in fact, I feel even more lonesome when I drink so it's widening the void. Jesus this is a right bitch.
It helps to write things down here cos I know nobody judges and everybody empathises and understands. You're a great bunch!
I was just thinking about it there too... the concept of rock bottom. I mean, I've been arrested, woken up in a park, lost jobs, lost relationships, lost friendships, missed holidays, broken bones, Christ!! If those aren't rock bottom what the hell is!
And.. the moment that made me stop recently wasn't even that bad. It was just a 3 day bender that made me feel so ridiculously ashamed that I thought to myself... who the **** have you become. STOP. I had wine in my hand, unopened and I just ****ed it away.
I can beat this. I'm a strong person and I know that I can but today is really tough.

Porklife

One other thought that I'd really appreciate opinions on (this may be wishful thinking) but how do you feel about 28 days to break a habit?
So apparently it takes 28 days to break a habit so if you go 28 days without alcohol, you can then pause and reassess and perhaps go back into it with a new found respect for alcohol, new boundaries and rules for yourself. However, the caveat is, if you fall before the 28 day mark, then you can never drink again. Absintence is the only way forward for you cos you proved you couldn't even go 28 days.
Is that nonsense.. now that I write it down it seems bit immature and silly

K.Flyer

Porklife wrote: »

One other thought that I'd really appreciate opinions on (this may be wishful thinking) but how do you feel about 28 days to break a habit?
So apparently it takes 28 days to break a habit so if you go 28 days without alcohol, you can then pause and reassess and perhaps go back into it with a new found respect for alcohol, new boundaries and rules for yourself. However, the caveat is, if you fall before the 28 day mark, then you can never drink again. Absintence is the only way forward for you cos you proved you couldn't even go 28 days.
Is that nonsense.. now that I write it down it seems bit immature and silly

Ok, not wanting to sound too harsh, but that very, very rarely works out well.
I've seen a lot of people try it, and fail miserably, only to find themselves thinking they're failures and beating themselves up over it.
Stopping means just that, you have taken the first steps and have got this far, now keep going and the path will get clearer.
Don't give up, you Can do it!
Find something that can be your distraction for when you find yourself thinking about things too much, going for a walk, a drive, music, movie, a hobby, posting on boards, whatever it is.
It does get easier, but from the decriptions of what you posted earlier, I think you are better off just staying off it completely.
Stay strong.

28 days to break a habit is BS. There are a lot of fat people who dieted for a month or 6 then slipped back. I've done it myself numerous times.

It's about figuring out what works for you at the end of the day. Maybe you will at some point be able to have a drink or two but that shouldn't be on your mind right now. I still sometimes think I might get pissed drunk on my own at some point (my favorite way to drink) but I'm not planning to.
We all have our own circumstances and I know if I went back on the drink I'd be tortured by several people to drink with them. That would end up meaning drinking every second weekend for a few months.
You'll have to stop with the negotiating with yourself about it. If you have a drink or two yeah, odds are it'll be no big deal that time. But it removes a line in the sand. Why wouldn't you have a couple next time you're out or at a wedding? Why not have 2 after work, sure it was fine on Friday. Why not get pissed one time when someone is home and wants a night out? Sure you've not got drunk in ages.

This is all just from my perspective and it all comes down to you in the end. I have a few mates struggling with things and drink/drugs are a part and not helping. They'll take a step, listen to experience a bit then decide they know better. 3-6 months later it's start again with a fanfare then they're tired after work and the cycle continues.

Porklife

I've seen this first hand myself Button with a very close friend of mine recently. He has a serious problem with booze and he's trying everything in his power to stop; AA, self help books, counselling, CBD oil instead, running and all to no avail... well not no avail, what happens is exactly as you said. He will go 6 weeks without drinking and he'll be flying it. I'm so proud of him but then he'll think he's fine and he'll 'treat' himself to a pint. He will literally just have the one and then he won't drink again for a week. Way-hey! He's cured! Let's celebrate!! He'll then up the ante to two pints... then two pints and a chaser of whiskey (he loves whiskey) and lo and behold he's in absolute pieces and on a continual bender. Back on the unmerry-go-round.
My last bender, the one that made me put the glass down, was with him as it happens. We've decided that we can no longer drink together. We're really good friends and can hang out but not in pubs and not anywhere near booze because we are each others trigger. That makes me sad.

I know in my heart I can't do moderation. I can't do it with chocolate ( one square = entire bar), music (I like a band I'll become obsessed with them), fitness (if I'm getting fit then I'm training for a marathon) and certainly not booze (if I'm drinking then I'm giving Shane MaGowan a run for his money).

I guess I'm an extreme person. My dad was the same and booze killed him in the end. He told me countless times that it's fools gold and a mugs game. He also tried the moderating approach and failed.

Writing here is helping, the advice is invaluable. I'ma lone drinker too, that's my favourite way to drink but I've just got to find replacements and keep on truckin' without the sauce.

Thank you all so much.

Foweva Awone

There's an AA analogy that goes something like, you can't turn a pickle back into a cucumber. You can maybe stop the pickling process in the early stages, but once the cucumber has been pickled (or the problematic alcohol dependence has been established) it's futile to think you can go back.

My addiction psychiatrist has explained this to me before with lots of complicated evidence about permanent changes to the neural pathways and synapses in your brain. However I still went back time and time again, the reasoning been that I've done absolutely tonnes of counselling and psychotherapy and group therapy and DBT and CBT and everything else, so surely I wouldn't have to drink alcoholically any more. I was mentally well and happy and stable, and sober a very long time. Every time, despite my best intentions, I went back drinking just as hard as before and with all of the terrible consequences as before.

My experience is similar to the vast majority with similar thinking; if you are wise you'll get the learning from this without have to directly experience it for yourself, like i stubbornly insisted on doing!

Porklife

Porklife wrote: »

I've seen this first hand myself Button with a very close friend of mine recently. He has a serious problem with booze and he's trying everything in his power to stop; AA, self help books, counselling, CBD oil instead, running and all to no avail... well not no avail, what happens is exactly as you said. He will go 6 weeks without drinking and he'll be flying it. I'm so proud of him but then he'll think he's fine and he'll 'treat' himself to a pint. He will literally just have the one and then he won't drink again for a week. Way-hey! He's cured! Let's celebrate!! He'll then up the ante to two pints... then two pints and a chaser of whiskey (he loves whiskey) and lo and behold he's in absolute pieces and on a continual bender. Back on the unmerry-go-round.
My last bender, the one that made me put the glass down, was with him as it happens. We've decided that we can no longer drink together. We're really good friends and can hang out but not in pubs and not anywhere near booze because we are each others trigger. That makes me sad.

I know in my heart I can't do moderation. I can't do it with chocolate ( one square = entire bar), music (I like a band I'll become obsessed with them), fitness (if I'm getting fit then I'm training for a marathon) and certainly not booze (if I'm drinking then I'm giving Shane MaGowan a run for his money).

I guess I'm an extreme person. My dad was the same and booze killed him in the end. He told me countless times that it's fools gold and a mugs game. He also tried the moderating approach and failed.

Writing here is helping, the advice is invaluable. I'ma lone drinker too, that's my favourite way to drink but I've just got to find replacements and keep on truckin' without the sauce.

Thank you all so much.

Last time I drank I decided to have a bender with a mate, 20 hours+, great fun. :P I'd not been drunk for 6 weeks before that and that time I went all out (not just booze).
I think not being the going-out type has made it easier in some ways for me to stay off the drink because I don't have people hassling me to do it. I only ever went out when convinced to do so. At the same time it means fewer excuses because it's all on me. :P
I found what helped me getting into something like a routine, though maybe it's not the right word. Not necessarily doing the same thing every day but having a few commons points to hit. Whether it's getting up early or bed by a certain time. Or once a week treating yourself to getting home and doing nothing or a big run.
One difference with drinking and losing weight is that you still have to eat. :P But you can kinda apply stuff across different areas. Most people I talk to say they treat themselves once a week when on a diet. I'm closer to once a month, maybe twice. By not setting out treats I can say yes on a spur of the moment (family dinner, someone offers lunch etc.) and am still winning. :P With drinking say no to all the easier ones straight up and it leaves fewer times that you'll be tempted. Instead of hmming and hawing over every offer or opportunity just make sure you say no straight away then it's easier if there's a tempting offer to make the effort to say no that one specific time.

Porklife

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Last time I drank I decided to have a bender with a mate, 20 hours+, great fun. :P I'd not been drunk for 6 weeks before that and that time I went all out (not just booze).
I think not being the going-out type has made it easier in some ways for me to stay off the drink because I don't have people hassling me to do it. I only ever went out when convinced to do so. At the same time it means fewer excuses because it's all on me. :P
I found what helped me getting into something like a routine, though maybe it's not the right word. Not necessarily doing the same thing every day but having a few commons points to hit. Whether it's getting up early or bed by a certain time. Or once a week treating yourself to getting home and doing nothing or a big run.
One difference with drinking and losing weight is that you still have to eat. :P But you can kinda apply stuff across different areas. Most people I talk to say they treat themselves once a week when on a diet. I'm closer to once a month, maybe twice. By not setting out treats I can say yes on a spur of the moment (family dinner, someone offers lunch etc.) and am still winning. :P With drinking say no to all the easier ones straight up and it leaves fewer times that you'll be tempted. Instead of hmming and hawing over every offer or opportunity just make sure you say no straight away then it's easier if there's a tempting offer to make the effort to say no that one specific time.

We sound quite similar in our drinking style Button. I love having the apartment to myself, lighting candles sticking on a movie and pouring a glass of red. I like pubs too but only quiet pubs and I prefer drinking with just one other person or a very small group.
Typically when I was drinking and feeling lonely there wouldn't be any offers on the table but now that I'm not, there seems to be work nights out, guys asking me out old friends getting in touch for a drink etc. It's almost like I'm being tested!
I have this childish thought in my head too that I didn't get to say goodbye to Guinness or Baileys. I didn't plan on stopping. I didn't forsee not bouncing back from my most recent bender. I can't imagine never having a Guinness or Baileys again but I need to let that go. It's ridiculous

Sigma Force

Porklife wrote: »

One other thought that I'd really appreciate opinions on (this may be wishful thinking) but how do you feel about 28 days to break a habit?
So apparently it takes 28 days to break a habit so if you go 28 days without alcohol, you can then pause and reassess and perhaps go back into it with a new found respect for alcohol, new boundaries and rules for yourself. However, the caveat is, if you fall before the 28 day mark, then you can never drink again. Absintence is the only way forward for you cos you proved you couldn't even go 28 days.
Is that nonsense.. now that I write it down it seems bit immature and silly

It actually takes three months not 28 days but again it depends on the person. Sometimes three months is too far ahead for people. Take it one day at a time, sometimes counting the days helps people othertimes it turns into a countdown till they can drink again it just depends again on the person. You're doing fantastic!

Sigma Force

Porklife wrote: »

We sound quite similar in our drinking style Button. I love having the apartment to myself, lighting candles sticking on a movie and pouring a glass of red. I like pubs too but only quiet pubs and I prefer drinking with just one other person or a very small group.
Typically when I was drinking and feeling lonely there wouldn't be any offers on the table but now that I'm not, there seems to be work nights out, guys asking me out old friends getting in touch for a drink etc. It's almost like I'm being tested!
I have this childish thought in my head too that I didn't get to say goodbye to Guinness or Baileys. I didn't plan on stopping. I didn't forsee not bouncing back from my most recent bender. I can't imagine never having a Guinness or Baileys again but I need to let that go. It's ridiculous

Have you any support for yourself? Like from your GP or another group. I know you're nervous to try AA again and if you're not comfortable with it there are other options like one on one counselling. There's just not enough support nationwide for people it's mostly in the Dublin area. BCAT in bray are fantastic but not sure if you're anywhere near there. They're a life saver they really are. There's other places that do private or subsidised counselling too. Worth looking in to for a bit of practical support. Have you any friends or family that understand what you're going through and that are supportive? Oh and the sugar cravings do ease off. They're crazy at first my bf is two years sober and is only now cutting down on the lucozade lol but that's just part of it. Switching to grapes or spirulina (spelling?) may help but you'll burn it off working out and just remember to drink lots of water. Flavour it with juice if it gets boring. You seem to be in a great frame of mind to do this, just make sure you habe the support it's usually when you least expect it you need it and it's so nice to be able to talk to someone non judgmental or even have a friend you can message Day or night, even if they're asleep you've got it out of your head and you know they'll read it in the morning and respond.

Porklife

Thanks a million Sigma Force and great to hear about your bf and his amazing road to recovery. I admire him and anybody else who manages to even start the journey, let alone complete it. Well, I made it to the 3 week mark then fell off the wagon. Although, I don't really feel like I fell in so far as I woke up that morning and said **** it, I'm drinking after work tonight. It was a Friday and I had friends visiting for the weekend and a possible romantic liaison which I just didn't want to do sober. I decided to jump off the wagon. Back on it now but struggling because of the sunshine yada yada insert excuse here.. this is way harder than I ever imagined it would be.

Chalk McHugh

Any update Porklife? Interesting topic.

Granadino

Gave up a few years back while waiting for a gallstone operation, and haven´t looked back really. I never drank much anyway, but do not miss the hangovers. Fell off the wagon twice in the last year and got badly badly drunk, did some really stupid things, and had a raging hangover for two days.
I spend some time in Spain, and you can get really nice non alcoholic beers here, as well as vino sin alcol (in Granada anyway). It´s a pity it's limited in Ireland for non alco stuff. The Erdinger isn't the tastiest.
I do not miss the hangovers, and embarrassing incidents.
I still go out, maybe a bit less, but still go out, just don't get drunk.
It's since I really stopped that I notice how much lots of things revolve around booze....