Setback

LegacyUser

Myself and my ex-husband split up about 6 years ago. (We possibly got married too young and ended up wanting different things). He moved on very quickly,too quickly and began a relationship with a colleague of his. I went for councelling, tried to become a better person than i was going into the marriage (or at the very least tried not be a lesser version of myself). I've had a couple of relationships since then which didnt work out.
Although we have some mutual friends we haven't actually had much cause to be in each other's company. Until yesterday. We were at a friends party, his partner and their child were there too.
I thought that i was completely over him, my life is good, i have an amazing family and great friends, i am well aware of this. But seeing him with our old friends around got to me, i ended up drinking too much I had a little bit of a breakdown.
Now im left so confused about it all. I honestly didn't think that it would have such an effect on me.

Kidchameleon

AnotherSetBack wrote: »

I thought that i was completely over him

You probably are. It may have just been that you saw him + partner + child and are thinking about what could have been. If that is the case then it will be a hard few days but it will pass. If you are no better in a week or two then definitely more counseling is in order to work through it. Ask yourself this, have you ever really thought about him much in, say, the last five years?

LegacyUser

I do think of him now and then, in a normal way i guess.
It's just that i saw him and had a bit of a catch up. I juat feel so strange about it. How i was feeling, i know that i should have made my excuses and left but i just wanted to be around him.
I think you're probably right about needing a few days to get over it.

joeguevara

Everyone has setbacks. It is probably pertinent that it was one of the first times you had been in his company. Treat it for what it was, a learning experience but if it is having an effect on you still in a week then talk to someone about it. A friend or if you think it will help someone more qualified.

Most people when they see exes, especially around friends have setbacks. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t over them. It just a reminder. Think of how you have grown since you split and be happy with that. Hopefully it wasn’t all negative and he is happy with his new partner. I hope you can get over this and are happy too.

Sometimes out of the blue I get reminders of past relationships. A song, a smell of perfume, a restaurant can remind me. It can hit me like a ton of bricks. But then I pick myself up and realize I am better not being in that relationship.

Stan27

all natural feelings I think. just give it time.