Loosing a young dog

AryaStark

Had such a heart breaking time a few weeks ago. Our 1 year old dog managed to get out of our garden and got hit by a car... I was in the garden playing with both my dogs at the time and Gandalf got over excited and somehow jumped over the fence (over 6 foot and he had never jumped so high before). We live beside a main road so are very paranoid about keeping the dogs in.
Just after he jumped I heard the bang (I can't stop hearing it)...

It was horrible - the car that hit him didn't stop (though it wasn't their fault obviously)- I was with him within a minute and he was already gone. ( a car stopped and a lovely guy helped me and drove me into the vet just in case, although I think we both knew he was already gone) He was only 1 and 5 months. I am not coping well without him and can't stop crying and wishing he was still here.

My problem is now my poor girl Nymeria - she is 5 and not coping well either. She was there when it happened and they were so close. She is pining away and really missing him. She wants to stay in bed all day - they both slept in my bedroom and in the mornings I have to put a lead on her to get her out of bed and she will try to get back there all day unless block the door.
I am trying to be ok for her because I am sure it is not helping me being depressed.

There is no way I could get another dog yet (it would feel too much like I was replacing him and wouldn't be fair on the new dog) so I am wondering if anybody has experience of this kind of grief in a dog and how to handle it.

cocker5

God heart breaking to read your post OP... beauftul dog x no words of wisdom .. just so sorry and thinking of you at this difficult time x

Charles Ingles

Tears streaming down my face after looking at pictures after reading post.
Sorry for your loss sad times

DBB

Oh my god Aryastark, I've a lump in my throat reading your awful news... I always enjoyed reading your posts about the journey you were going through with your new pup, and looking at the your photos.
What a terrible accident, it's completely understandable that you feel utterly traumatised and so grief-stricken. Do you think it might help you to talk it all through with a bereavement counsellor? It just might help you to somewhat come to terms with events, which can be pretty hard to process all on your own.
Thoughts are with you

AryaStark

DBB wrote: »

Oh my god Aryastark, I've a lump in my throat reading your awful news... I always enjoyed reading your posts about the journey you were going through with your new pup, and looking at the your photos.
What a terrible accident, it's completely understandable that you feel utterly traumatised and so grief-stricken. Do you think it might help you to talk it all through with a bereavement counsellor? It just might help you to somewhat come to terms with events, which can be pretty hard to process all on your own.
Thoughts are with you

Thanks for your kind words.... I will think about it. Ill do anything to make my girl feel better and maybe processing things myself will help her.

She is very sensitive and I guess she is feeling my pain as well as her own.

Choc Chip

I've no advice or anything helpful to say AryaStark, I'm just so sorry. Please look after yourself.

I have a foster dog who is with me because she jumps 8ft easily and needs to be on a lead unless being worked. I'll be cuddling her extra tight tonight. That's such a tragic accident that could happen so easily.

AryaStark

Choc Chip wrote: »

I've no advice or anything helpful to say AryaStark, I'm just so sorry. Please look after yourself.

I have a foster dog who is with me because she jumps 8ft easily and needs to be on a lead unless being worked. I'll be cuddling her extra tight tonight. That's such a tragic accident that could happen so easily.

It is so hard to keep a Husky contained... when I got my girl I lived elsewhere but had to move home to be a carer for my Mam. After moving home I spent over 1000 on a large fence and it keeps my girl contained perfectly. It also worked for Gandalf right up until it didn't work - he jumped onto his dog house roof and just bounded of the fence and over.

I can't get the bang out of my head and am now so paranoid about letting my girl out (have moved the house and anything else that could be used to jump) even though she has never been a big jumper (more of a digger).

dragona

I am so terribly sorry x

Gael23

Don’t blame yourself is the first and perhaps most important thing I’ll say.
Time does heal and it will get better, there is no right or wrong time to get another one.

Sheepdish1

I'm so sorry for your loss. So sad. It sounds like you are such a caring owner and your dog was lucky to have such a lovely owner. It also must have been very traumatic experience for

A guy I know saw his dog scale over a 6ft high gate recently. He is a very experienced owner and only for the fact he witnessed it there is no way anyone would have thought it was possible. I think it jumped on something first and then scaled the fence. He couldn't believe it.

I wonder is your dog trying to find comfort staying in your bed if that is where she feels safe and at ease. I would keep trying to give her plenty of attention which I am sure you are already doing. It sounds like you are doing all the right things so hopefully she'll improve in time. I think you are right about holding off on getting another dog until you are ready. It will take time. Take care of yourself.

the_syco

Sorry for your loss

i acknowledge that this seems like advice after the horse has bolted from the barn, but perhaps angle the fence inwards (lean-in fence) at the top of the fence, to help prevent a re-occurrence?

AryaStark

Gael23 wrote: »

Don’t blame yourself is the first and perhaps most important thing I’ll say.
Time does heal and it will get better, there is no right or wrong time to get another one.

It is so hard not to feel responsible... I wish he had gotten a chance and I can't help feeling that I should have been faster or stricter with his training.
He was just learning recall but was never off lead outside the garden so I was a bit relaxed about it.

He came from the pound in January 2018 at 12 weeks and had been a christmas present who was unwanted by the 3rd of January. Poor boy was so wanted here and made me smile and laugh every day... so unfair.

AryaStark

the_syco wrote: »

Sorry for your loss

i acknowledge that this seems like advice after the horse has bolted from the barn, but perhaps angle the fence inwards (lean-in fence) at the top of the fence, to help prevent a re-occurrence?

Most of the fence has flower baskets or drains with strawberries growing in them to block getting a grip ... Ive changed where he jumped and have added some fence to the top of the wall so you couldn't get a grip of jump on.

While my girl would never jump and is now almost 6 I am so paranoid that she will so am watching like a hawk and have added fence and moved anything you could jump on

cocker5

AryaStark wrote: »

the_syco wrote: »

Sorry for your loss

i acknowledge that this seems like advice after the horse has bolted from the barn, but perhaps angle the fence inwards (lean-in fence) at the top of the fence, to help prevent a re-occurrence?

Most of the fence has flower baskets or drains with strawberries growing in them to block getting a grip ... Ive changed where he jumped and have added some fence to the top of the wall so you couldn't get a grip of jump on.

While my girl would never jump and is now almost 6 I am so paranoid that she will so am watching like a hawk and have added fence and moved anything you could jump on

Possibly move kennel away from fence.. against the house instead so no leverage to jump up and over?

AryaStark

cocker5 wrote: »

Possibly move kennel away from fence.. against the house instead so no leverage to jump up and over?

Done.. there is no nothing near the fence now..

There is one place that might be vulnerable but somebody is coming this weekend to build it up for me...

cocker5

AryaStark wrote: »

Done.. there is no nothing near the fence now..

There is one place that might be vulnerable but somebody is coming this weekend to build it up for me...

all you can do is your best OP - horrible situation for you

Sheepdish1

AryaStark wrote: »

It is so hard not to feel responsible... I wish he had gotten a chance and I can't help feeling that I should have been faster or stricter with his training.
He was just learning recall but was never off lead outside the garden so I was a bit relaxed about it.

He came from the pound in January 2018 at 12 weeks and had been a christmas present who was unwanted by the 3rd of January. Poor boy was so wanted here and made me smile and laugh every day... so unfair.

It sounds like you gave him a very happy life, some animals never get to feel that kind of comfort or love so he was lucky to have experienced that with you.

This is one of those very unfortunate and unlucky things to happen. it sounds like you did so much to contain them, it really is unfortunate. Even if he had strong recall he would have been over the fence and out too quick imo so try not to blame yourself, recall would't have been a guarantee to stop this happening imo.