Facing legal seperation....Some questions

Baby01032012

Apologies if my questions have been covered multiple times in this forum and thanks for taking the time to read...


Im a man..married 7 years have 2 small kids family home in joint names although I contributed 100% to the purchase...no mortgage though. I pay electricity gas bins and any large out goings for the kids. My wife isn't working at the moment. I moved out of the family home at Christmas which was my wife's wish. I still love her but I understand/have to accept the marriage is over. I live near by so that i can see the kids. I've been seeing the kids a briefly during the week and at weekend.

My wife now wants to put a proper legal separation in place has asked if i want to do it via mediation or through solicitors. I've read all i can on the citizens information. I'm going to FLAC at the earliest appointment which is 2 weeks time. I may go for priavte legal advice.

I see family mediation service is free but the waiting time for appointment is 20 weeks in my area.

I guess reading the citizens information raised a few questions.

For the family mediation
-are there any charges for this service?
-Is it advisable to still have a solicitor?
-how does this differ from engaging a private mediator?
-I've also heard of collaborative solcitiors
- I understand any agreement is not legally binding unless i go to solicitor to make it a contract or deed of seperation?
-will i be required to produce records showing income and outgoings?

I guess going directly through a solicitor is quicker?

I'm unsure of what maintenance i might expect to agree to pay?

In terms of other assets that i have since before my relationship, will my wife have any claim to these?

I also have concerns I will end up with less access to the kids. I already find it difficult that I'm not there for them all of the time and that I'm loosing touch with what's going on in their lives.

I'd appreciate any similar experiences you may have.

LastStop

Baby01032012 wrote: »

In terms of other assets that i have since before my relationship, will my wife have any claim to these?

I also have concerns I will end up with less access to the kids. I already find it difficult that I'm not there for them all of the time and that I'm loosing touch with what's going on in their lives.

I'd appreciate any similar experiences you may have.

Unless you have a prenup everything you have she is entitled to a share.

get a good solicitor and make sure you are happy with the access agreement.

if you can remain civil you will keep costs down.

I learned the hard way that agreement between you and her are worthless if she changes her mind so best for all to have all done and stamped by court.

Ken.

LastStop wrote: »

Unless you have a prenup everything you have she is entitled to a share.

Prenups have no legal standing in Ireland except as a slight step above the toilet paper we all remember from primary school.

Henry Ford III

It's a ****ty situation OP.

I'd avoid the solicitors if at all possible. They will keep you arguing and keep racking up fees.

See if mediation works.

Your ex will be entitled to a substantial amount of everything - your income, assets, and pensions. That's just the way it is.

Best of luck.

SoapMcTavish

LastStop wrote: »

Unless you have a prenup everything you have she is entitled to a share.

Haha .. someone is watching too much American TV .... no prenups in Ireland.

Work it out and sign it off with yer solicitors - or else you risk the chance of a Judge deciding ....

LastStop

SoapMcTavish wrote: »

Haha .. someone is watching too much American TV .... no prenups in Ireland.

Work it out and sign it off with yer solicitors - or else you risk the chance of a Judge deciding ....

I married outside of Ireland with a prenup....

dubal

I'd go through mediation if you can the wait can be good to let things calm down and both parties hopefully have reached some for of acceptance. Try for a cancellation, might be a little quicker.

Get a solicitor too, to see what you are entitled to, will help inform the mediation process.

Dubal

LegacyUser

LastStop wrote: »

Unless you have a prenup everything you have she is entitled to a share.

Before I got married, I asked for legal advice about this topic. One of the absolute requirements for me to accept getting married is that the other partner would NOT be entitled to any share of any of the assets I had before the marriage. I made it absolutely clear that, if that weren't the case, I would refuse to get into a marriage, under any circumstances.

At the time, I was assured by TWO advisors that, since Ireland doesn't follow the "common assets" rule, anything that would be exclusively in my name would remain such in case of separation or divorce, without any possibility of claim.

Now, the time of judicial separation has come, and I'm told that the other party is entitled to a share of everything, and that such share could even be 100%.

Someone is definitely wrong here, or was wrong back then, but I have no intention of giving up what I earned with my own hard work, long before the marriage was even considered. I'm considering to apply to void the marriage altogether.

SoapMcTavish

Judicial separation - judge decides where the assets go. You're better off working out an agreement together. And it's less expensive than court.