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  • 16-01-2019 11:54AM
    #1
    teddy6
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28 ✭


    Hi there,
    I am separated for a number of months. I have brought my ex to court for maintenance and that has been granted.
    My question is around access to the children. He doesn't seem to want to see them. He didn't see them for 3 weeks after Christmas and then was late. Is there any way legally that he has to see the children. I am ready to pull access as a strategy for him to man up and take the kids regularly so that they have a relationship with their father and also regular access would offer the children security and avoid them being disappointed.
    My question is.. if he decides not to see them is there anything I can do. It seems only a parents who is being denied access can apply for it through the courts.
    I have a solicitor on the case. I am just looking to see if there is anyone out there who has had a similar experience. And yes I know its incredibly sad that he shows so little interest. I believe that when he left me he also left the children
    Many thanks


Comments

  • #2
    ayux4rj6zql2ph
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,716 ✭✭✭ayux4rj6zql2ph


    I only know what I’ve seem with my sister, she was like yourself wanting the father/child relationship to happen, the father had no interest.

    The court system cannot order a man to see his children if he does not want to, they can order him to pay maintenance which you have secured.

    You need to do what is best for the children, will removing access completely be damaging to them?

    No matter what your opinion is of their father don’t ever speak negatively to them about him or to others in front of them. Were this a separated father with sole custody I’d still give the same opinion.


  • #3
    Xterminator
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,833 ✭✭✭Xterminator


    My question is.. if he decides not to see them is there anything I can do

    you can minimize the impact on the children.

    but as for forcing him to see the children, think that one through. what would the quality of a forced visit be? Even if you could do so, it wouldn't be in the children's best interest unless the parent did so voluntarily.

    Listen we all go through things in our life and clearly this parent is letting his children down. But you can only hope that as he matures/gets over the break up/ goes through life he will take a greater interest and forge a good relationship.

    As the earlier poster said all you can do is ensure there are no barriers at your end to his having a good relationship, and never discuss how you feel about your partner negatively if the the children are present. (not saying you do/would).


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