Sudden preoccupation with looking horrible in photos?!!

LegacyUser

I've always taken pride in my appearance and always sort of had the idea that I was an attractive woman. Compliments over the years, a fair amount of male attention, how people respond to me, that kind of thing.

I'm in my 30s now and well groomed, hair, skincare, nails, clothes, the usual. I also get botox regularly, work out, in shape etc. More recently I've been seeing photos of myself and been devastated at how I look. I don't know if I'm just looking more closely now or if it's that I'm not generally photogenic - but all I see in any photo of myself recently is that my nose is all over the place, big chin, thin lips...I don't look like the "me" i have in my head, if that makes sense?

It's brought me to a place where I'm avoiding photos, trying to overcompensate with makeup, excessive use of filters, seriously considering a rhinoplasty whereas I never even thought about my nose before...I'm trying to figure if this is a perception thing, as it doesn't make any sense that my face would suddenly have changed to that point overnight! I also recently lost a bit of weight (a stone...nothing major) and am wondering if this is making me overly scrutinous with my appearance or if I actually do have a bigger/fatter nose and bigger chin now....?

In general I wouldn't be an overly anxious person, but I am quite self critical of myself, always have been. I'm wondering if this is something that will change if I work on improving my self esteem (which I wouldn't consider as being massively low?) or what else could possibly be going on here.

Has anyone else ever felt this way about themselves suddenly? Or am I just an unphotogenic person and should take what the camera shows me with a giant pinch of salt?!

Sardonicat

OP, where do you get your sense of self worth from?

You mention that you don't consider yourself to have low self esteem so was wondering how you develop your sense of self. Is it based solely on your appearance or do you also take into account personal achievements, intelligence, kindness, humour etc?

Do you judge others on appearance as harshly as you judge yourself and do you hold them to the same standards as you hold yourself?

IMO, botox in your 30s is unnecessary and points to an unhealthy preoccupation with appearance to the detriment of other aspects of your self.

Realistically, no one gives a sh1t what other people look like in photos. We all age and change as a result, while its possible to mitigate against the worst of that now with intervention (if that's your kind of thing) we can't hold back the aging process forever. We all have to come to terms with that, it's not the end of the world. After all, we each of us are far more than what we look like to others.

HamSarris

I'd go see a therapist or talk to your GP about your anxiety. You seem quite obsessive in your need to find reassurance about your attractiveness - if left unchecked this can develop into body dsymorphic disorder, an eating disorder or an addiction to plastic surgery. If your weight starts to fall further be very careful as it could lead down a black hole of anorexia from which it's very hard to recovery.