Stressed over Moving and settling into new job

LegacyUser

Hi Everyone,

I am male, 30 years old and I have a problem with settling down in any place ive moved to or worked in so far in my life. Since 2013 I have lived in 5 different places, which involved 5 separate moves to different parts of the country each place with different jobs and that is not including college. And now I may be embarking on another move to a different part of the country again which is causing me to stress about where I am in my life and what I am doing and settling a bit.

This dissatisfaction and lack of ability to settle eventually resulted in me moving home last year to take a job that payed considerably less than my previous role, however, I did it in the hope that I would settle better. Things were OK in this role and I felt I was mixing well with my work colleagues, better I felt than anywhere that I worked before, however, things began to take a sharp downwards turn toward the end of this year when it became apparent that a lot of my co workers became very unhappy in the workplace and wanted to better themselves. Morale hit the floor as one by one a lot of people who I got to know left and I became very unhappy too also feeling that I wanted to leave, however, position in my industry are scarce where I am from.

I have since applied for a position which I have been successful in, but the role will require me having to move again. The role is better with better pay and conditions however I am really stressing about the idea of having to move yet again to another part of the country and trying my hand at settling once again. New people, new place trying to find my bearings, it just feels too much for me. I know if I stay in my current role I will be unhappy but the idea of moving yet again just doesnt appeal to me either.

I really dont know what to do with myself or where my life is going. I feel that I am at the stage where I need to find a career where I can settle and stay in for a few years and hopefully progress. I see some of my peers and they are in the same company for 3 - 4 years now, more settled and getting promotions and moving up the career ladder. I in comparison am moving from a to b to c, very unsettled and loosing out. Im really worried about this move as I feel it has to be a right move for me. I need this to work out. Im wondering did I bounce myself into this move because of other people leaving the company. My head feels like its spinning and im not eating or sleeping well for the last while over this.
I need to calm down I know, should I be stressing so much over this? Is it normal for people to change careers so much over a short period of time? I just feel so sick of moving all the time, I just want one place to stick to and settle in.

Unanimous

Just calm down this time around.
If you don't like this place then move. But when you move you have to be sure you are moving to an area that you could easily get another job if you don't like your job.
Also, try making friends or even dating so that you can settle down.
All the best

Graniteville

You don't seem to be changing careers, just the company and location.

Fairly common in some industries esp IT.

Look outside work for continuity. Possibly something like Toastmasters is ideal for you. You meet local people in a club atmosphere and with the average age in mid to late thirties, it can take the stress away.

My work used to involve a lot of traveling for a week or so and I always dropped into a Toastmasters club in whatever area I was in and made great friends over the years.

Whenever I moved house (dublin, London, France, Wicklow, Kildare) I joined the local club and very quickly felt comfortable.