who to ask to your wedding?

Amprodude

I hope I'm not asking a stupid question but I am a bit stuck on who to ask at work to my wedding? I work in a department with 5 of us on shift and we have 2 supporting officers as well that work on our team even though they look after maintenance. I don't particularly like one of those officers even though I didn't have a falling out with that person i just cant stand that person and don't want to invite this person to my wedding. I get on very well with the other officer and would like to invite that person. Can I invite all my shift team and not the officer that i dislike? or should i not invite the two officers and just my shift team? I get on fine with all of the shift team. It's a nightmare trying to solve this. Opinions be good on the topic.

woodchuck

I think the "all or nothing" approach is best. If you're inviting everyone else, I think you'll also have to invite the person you don't like. If nothing else, I'd be worried about being accused of bullying in the workplace by excluding them (although maybe I'm just a little bit paranoid!).

But just because you invite them, doesn't mean they'll actually attend. If they feel the same way about you as you feel about them, they're likely to decline the invite. Even if they do show up though, if it's a big wedding, you'll hardly even noticed they're there.

AvonEnniskerry

Personally I'd just invite the small few I want there but since you're inviting your whole team leaving out one person is a bit lousy.

Pistachios & cream

Is the person you don't like aware of the issues you have with them and are they reciprocated? If its well known that you mutually don't get on then its possible that not inviting them is fine.

However if they are unaware about how you feel then excluding them solely is going to show them exactly what your feelings are and in a public manner. It's possible that would affect your future work relationship and only you can decide if thats an issue in your workplace and for you.

I found the most diplomatic thing to do is to have a clear policy- so team members but not the 2 supporting/All colleagues/No Colleagues. Everyone has to make decisions about numbers at weddings and work colleagues are often the ones that have to be left uninvited as relations/close friends are prioritised.

lazygal

I invited one person to our wedding even though I had misgivings for a few reasons. I didn't want to make difficulties in a group of friends. I regret it. If I had my time over I'd leave them out and just let people get over it.

bertsmom

I would only invite people to the wedding that you actually want there. If there is someone you dislike I wouldn't invite. Its not a work event its a personal day.
I wouldn't give out the invitations at work tho or be having wedding conversations around this person that may not be invited. Im sure they probably wouldn't think much of it one way or another but if its a big topic of conversation that they are always around but not involved in the chat it may be inconsiderate.
Sum up: invite who you want, dont do invites during work time. Be considerate to the uninvited but ultimately if they have a problem with it they will get over it.

splinter65

Ask them all or don’t ask anyone. First of all she probably won’t go and secondly even if she does, you will be so caught up with everything else on the big day that you’re just not going to even notice.
Your wedding day is not the day to be driving home a point. Be the bigger person.

GingerLily

There was one girl is work that I really didn't like, i invited her anyway to keep the piece and she declined as she had other plans (I suspect as an excuse). Worked out fine for me thankfully

The Crowman

Amprodude wrote: »

I hope I'm not asking a stupid question but I am a bit stuck on who to ask at work to my wedding? I work in a department with 5 of us on shift and we have 2 supporting officers as well that work on our team even though they look after maintenance. I don't particularly like one of those officers even though I didn't have a falling out with that person i just cant stand that person and don't want to invite this person to my wedding. I get on very well with the other officer and would like to invite that person. Can I invite all my shift team and not the officer that i dislike? or should i not invite the two officers and just my shift team? I get on fine with all of the shift team. It's a nightmare trying to solve this. Opinions be good on the topic.

Why would you invite people you work with to your wedding?

endacl

A few of us were invited to a colleague’s wedding last month. The consensus was, ‘oh bollox. A wedding to go to’. Bear that in mind. While they will undoubtedly wish you every happiness for the future, a wedding is an event close friends and family tend to be delighted to attend. For many other people, they can be an expensive hassle.