Today is World Mental Health Day

Tipsy McSwagger · 10-10-2018 8:42am #1

If you are going through any mental health issues then please talk to somebody. Please seek help rather than bottle it up or feel any sense of shame. Visit your GP, talk to someone in work, call a helpline. You will start to feel better once you make that first step of reaching out.

https://www.mentalhealthireland.ie/need-help-now/

Mookie Blaylock · 10-10-2018 8:43am

Time to beat the black dog

Hector Savage · 10-10-2018 8:44am

It's a tough one, reaching out ? - I don't think it's a good idea to reach out to colleagues at least - people can be really cruel -truth is people don't wanna know and don't give a ****, thats the sad truth in all of this.
Best reaching out to professionals.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 10-10-2018 8:48am

Hector Savage wrote: »

It's a tough one, reaching out ? - I don't think it's a good idea to reach out to colleagues at least - people can be really cruel -truth is people don't wanna know and don't give a ****, thats the sad truth in all of this.
Best reaching out to professionals.

Was about to post something similar: how many people reading this would welcome (or know what to do) if a close friend admitted to having suicidal thoughts?

myshirt · 10-10-2018 8:50am

What do you do if you've done all this and no one still gives a sh't?

Mookie Blaylock · 10-10-2018 8:51am

myshirt wrote: »

What do you do if you've done all this and no one still gives a sh't?

Find someone that does

wexie · 10-10-2018 8:53am

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

how many people reading this would welcome (or know what to do) if a close friend admitted to having suicidal thoughts?

Not many perhaps, but I'd like to think that if it was a friend and you didn't know what to do you might try to help find them someone that does?

wexie · 10-10-2018 8:56am

myshirt wrote: »

What do you do if you've done all this and no one still gives a sh't?

Contact a mental health charity, your GP, the local mental health team, a helpline, online resources.

I know it's not easy but there are people you can talk to that will try to help.

The important thing to remember is that when you're talking to professionals no matter how fucked up you think things are there is every chance they've heard and dealt with worse and they will not be shocked or upset or anything by whatever it is you have to tell them.

Try_harder · 10-10-2018 8:56am

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

Was about to post something similar: how many people reading this would welcome (or know what to do) if a close friend admitted to having suicidal thoughts?

Surely being told is preferable to the alternative?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 10-10-2018 8:58am

Try_harder wrote: »

Surely being told is preferable to the alternative?

Well, the alternative some people will see is, "why the hell didn't you bother someoene else with this?"

wexie · 10-10-2018 9:04am

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

Well, the alternative some people will see is, "why the hell didn't you bother someoene else with this?"

Well then they aren't friends are they?

Try_harder · 10-10-2018 9:23am

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

Well, the alternative some people will see is, "why the hell didnt you bother someoene else with this?"

Not much of a friend then. If anyone reached out to me, the least Id do is give them information of people/places that can help. Prob refer them to their GP in the first instance. Let them talk if they want to talk. I cant imagine any friend as selfish as to lash out at someone asking for help

Try_harder · 10-10-2018 9:25am

People who may need help who read this are seeing some very negative unrealistic posts. The vast majority of friends would try to help.

wexie · 10-10-2018 9:29am

Try_harder wrote: »

People who may need help who read this are seeing some very negative unrealistic posts. The vast majority of friends would try to help.

Even just listening over a cuppa is helping, which certainly most people would.

Try_harder · 10-10-2018 9:32am

wexie wrote: »

Even just listening over a cuppa is helping, which certainly most people would.

Sometimes that is all that is required by a friend. A friend in need is a friend indeed

LirW · 10-10-2018 9:35am

I think the problem isn't suicidal thoughts, I see the creeping mental health issues as a far bigger problem.
Different people cope differently with things yet it's expected that we all perform the same. In a very expensive dog eat dog economy depression, anxiety and burn-out are a huge problem and while suicidal thoughts are an extreme that requires urgent attention, it's also very tough to talk to people that you are not alright, that you can't cope, that you're burnt out. If they've never been there many won't understand how bad it is. Often the people suffering from it don't even realise because the tension is part of their life by now and often they aren't told that in fact that is not normal.

If you feel tense, can't sleep, are very irritable and full of negative thoughts: go and seek help, it is out there and you're not admitting defeat. Do it for your own sake and for your future. Nobody needs to suffer.

xzanti · 10-10-2018 9:38am

myshirt wrote: »

What do you do if you've done all this and no one still gives a sh't?

If your GP doesn't give a sh1t, then you need a new GP.

Also, there's a group called www.aware.ie

They hold regular meetings in various counties.

I've heard they are quite a good resource for people who are struggling.

Failing that there's the Samaritans.

ChikiChiki · 10-10-2018 9:43am

Be careful and chose wisely who you reach out to. I known for a fact there are many who won't emphatise and workplaces that will view it negatively.

Having lost immediate family to suicide and being prone to bouts of depression myself in the past I certainly can empathise with people and would listen and offer counsel but that does not go for everyone. Its a tough tough and lonely place to be.

wexie · 10-10-2018 10:00am

ChikiChiki wrote: »

Be careful and chose wisely who you reach out to. I known for a fact there are many who won't emphatise and workplaces that will view it negatively

This is so so true, many workplaces with all the resources and policies in place will lend a sympathetic ear and pay lip service to helping and the moment you're out the HR door the 'damaged goods' stamp goes on your name.

ChikiChiki · 10-10-2018 10:16am

wexie wrote: »

This is so so true, many workplaces with all the resources and policies in place will lend a sympathetic ear and pay lip service to helping and the moment you're out the HR door the 'damaged goods' stamp goes on your name.

When I was going through my very rough patch I confidentially divulged quite a bit to HR who obviously were reporting same to senior management a lot of stuff I really didn't want them to know. The same organisation promotes a huge internal wellness programme. Needless to say my manager at time and still very good friend told me that senior management upon hearing began making moves to terminate contract.

I have come out the other side but that period was the lowest I've ever been.

indioblack · 10-10-2018 10:37am

Try_harder wrote: »

People who may need help who read this are seeing some very negative unrealistic posts. The vast majority of friends would try to help.

It's probably better to seek professional help. You can open up to someone who is effectively a stranger and non-judgmental in a way you would not do with friends and relatives.
Most people won't admit to their fears - so a person who does and seeks help is to be applauded.

LirW · 10-10-2018 10:47am

The problem with confiding in friends or family is that many have never been at this place and can't relate. It's not uncommon that the best advice you'll get is "Well if you're sad, then stop being sad and be happier".
Many people still think that people exaggerate or want attention. This of course is really counterproductive.

I've had a horrible depressive episode many years ago when I finished school, I did attend school in an entirely different system than in Ireland and I was 20 since you stay in that particular school longer than the average plus I was raising a child on my own. Shortly before leaving cert I had a total breakdown and I couldn't cope anymore. When I tried to reach out to any of my friends they all turned away.
I came out at the other end of it, I cut ties with them though and I know I never wanna go back to this dark place again.

The most important thing to remember is though that you're not alone. There is support out there. You don't need to be ashamed to seek help.

myshirt · 10-10-2018 11:04pm

Does anyone here volunteer with the Samaritans or has in the past? I'm from Limerick. Friend of mine volunteered, but tried to ring in sick one evening, and they talked him out of it. That's how good these people are.

I'd recommend them to anyone. Just pick up the phone guys, especially my fellow men out there as there is a significant issue with male mental health. Pick up the phone lads. You are not alone.