Will moving abroad make me happy

LegacyUser

I feel stuck in a rut the past few years, I am unsure why. I have been trying to work on myself and work through stuff from the past. I have been getting counselling for the past year, I have a lot of work done but there is still a long way to go. This process has taken a lot of my energy and been draining. However side by side with this I have felt that there is something missing from my life. I rent my own flat, have a nice work environment even though I find the job boring, the people are nice. I have my own car so no long commute to work. But there is a feeling that there is more out there for me. I would love to move abroad to live and work. But that phrase 'wherever I go there I am' springs to mind, am I naive to think that moving abroad will give me this happy exciting life? At present love life opportunities are limited where I live and all my friends are married and having kids. I am early 30s

Kitty6277

No one can answer the question of whether it'll make you happy, only you.

Just bear in mind that the grass isn't always greener somewhere else.

hobie21

Yes

Noo

Whether it will make you happy or not is impossible to tell. But making such a drastic change will force a new perspective and it may become clearer what element in your life is causing you to be unhappy.

zapper55

Moving abroad wont automatically improve your life. Could you move city to improve your social life?

BrokenArrows

7654/sdfgh wrote: »

I feel stuck in a rut the past few years, I am unsure why. I have been trying to work on myself and work through stuff from the past. I have been getting counselling for the past year, I have a lot of work done but there is still a long way to go. This process has taken a lot of my energy and been draining. However side by side with this I have felt that there is something missing from my life. I rent my own flat, have a nice work environment even though I find the job boring, the people are nice. I have my own car so no long commute to work. But there is a feeling that there is more out there for me. I would love to move abroad to live and work. But that phrase 'wherever I go there I am' springs to mind, am I naive to think that moving abroad will give me this happy exciting life? At present love life opportunities are limited where I live and all my friends are married and having kids. I am early 30s

Whats the worst that can happen? Your in your early 30's and you have another 30ish years of your life left working.

The time to make drastic changes to your life is now. It will only get harder the older you get.

Try moving abroad, and if it doesn't work out then who cares. You have a few stories to tell and have experienced something new. If it works out then amazing, you will have improved your life.

cloudatlas

If you move abroad with unresolved problems those problems will remain and you will have new practical problems, forming new relationships, finding a job, apartment. You'll likely be lonely for a while and take some time to get settled down. The grass is not always greener on the other side, it can be good but it takes some time to set up a new life. Don't expect everything to be hunky dory immediately but if you really want to move then be realistic and don't treat it like the fix all solution.

arainagusime

BrokenArrows wrote: »

Whats the worst that can happen? Your in your early 30's and you have another 30ish years of your life left working.

The time to make drastic changes to your life is now. It will only get harder the older you get.

Try moving abroad, and if it doesn't work out then who cares. You have a few stories to tell and have experienced something new. If it works out then amazing, you will have improved your life.

I wish I could like this post 18 times.

My family thinks I am crazy for uprooting at 31 but I had no man or kids tying me down so why not! I have no regrets. I made friends at work. Go for it, OP

daithi7

This goes without saying but Don't just move abroad to move abroad,there's a world of difference between London and a Paris for instance.

E.g. Paris is further, has a language barrier and a much bigger cultural barrier to climb so you are likely to be lonelier for longer.... And that's a huge consideration.

Instead, figure out what exactly you want to change in your life and for what e.g. do you want to live in a warm climate, learn a new language, discover Oz, move to vancouver so that you can ski at weekends, etc etc, etc

Is only when you weigh all that up, that y you'll be able to make a good decision for you as to where to move to, for what job and for how long etc.
Get busy with it, even planning it and considering your options should be cathartic. Good luck Op.

funkey_monkey

I was having issues with the same question. I'd always longed to move and despite being unhappy here I never did and it was always something wistful and a source of regret until I went to counselling.
I've not gone away - I had deeper problems that would have just followed me.

The thing is there is no point going abroad unless the underlying issues are resolved - you can't run away from you problems. If you did go to a new country what different would you do there to make your life better that you cannot do here? How would you meet people in say London or Toronto? Why can you not do that here?

You say you commute to work and that you rent. You also say that you love opportunities are slim where you are. As a first step could you rent in a more urban area where opportunities for socialising etc are more plentiful and take the commute as a trade-off.

My concern for you is that if you do more abroad as you state yourself - 'wherever I go there I am'.

Also, what is your reason for moving abroad? Is it because of stories from friends? Genuine interest in living/life in the location. Job opportunities? or hoping that all missing parts of your life fall magically into place?
If you are not making an effort to interact and socialise now, what would be the reason for you being the social butterfly in a new location?